At that time, Lin Xiaolun drove me off his bed. I felt resentful about it and originally planned to sew a little man to curse him. But after I finished sewing it, I gave the little doll to Lin Xiaolun.
I picked up the doll from the garbage dump in the neighborhood, gave it to Lin Xiaolun with a blushing face, and said, "I spent a whole day and night sewing this, and there are 8 small holes on my hand. I'm giving it to you."
Lin Xiaolun covered his nose and said in disgust: "What the hell is this?"
"This is you." I shook the rag doll in my hand and said, "This is called Xiao Xiaolun. It's you. I'm giving it to you now as a gift for our reconciliation."
Lin Xiaolun pinched the doll's legs with her fingertips like a little girl, and then looked at me with a frown.
I looked at him with an expression that said "If you don't accept it, you'll die", and then he turned and left, picking up the doll's leg.
I didn't expect that Lin Xiaolun stayed for so long and washed it so clean.
I should have been happy, but the moment he gave me the doll, I was extremely panicked.
Lin Xiaolun held the doll in his hand and asked with a smile: "Do you remember? You said you sewed this for me, and I hated it at the time. I thought it was dirty, smelly, and ugly."
"Then why do you still stay?" I held back my tears.
"I don't know. You obviously disliked it because it was ugly, but you kept it anyway." Lin Xiaolun handed it to me and said, "I'm giving it back to you."
"Why do you want to return it to me?" I didn't want Lin Xiaolun to reveal what I was thinking, but I was eager to know the answer.
Lin Xiaolun pulled the doll and looked at it again and again, and said, "I don't know what to do with it, so I'll give it back to you."
Give it back to me, this is the truth behind this sentence.
I stood up and said, "If you don't like it, just throw it away. It's very hurtful to give back something I gave you like this."
I walked to the door, opened it, and forced a smile: "The trash can is right at the door."
Lin Xiaolun did not stand up or move, but just held the rag doll in silence.
The light that gathered in my eyes gradually died down, and I said, "Handle it yourself."
Then I closed the door and left everything to God.
Lin Xiaolun is very capable. He can hurt me without being noticed every time. I admire him very much. I don’t have such wisdom.
I didn't want to meet Lin Xiaolun as soon as I went out, so I stayed at home the whole day on Sunday and took the bus back to school in the evening.
March 8th is the day when the "Red Association" holds a party.
I arrived early and accompanied Guo Lu in the activities before the party started. The party officially started at 6pm.
Guo Lu has always been very popular, so many people came to support him. Before the party started, the audience seats were already full. Guo Lu specially reserved VIP seats for me, Lin Xiaolun and Ding Chuchu.
The only highlight of the evening party was probably the pantomime program "I and It". The curtain was painted by Guo Lu and I, and the performer was a little girl invited by Guo Lu. She was wearing a parrot-colored close-fitting dance costume, which made her look beautiful and friendly. Moreover, the dancers accompanying her were not humans, but many well-trained birds.
Guo Lu's ability is here, there is nothing he can't do.
After "I and It" ended, the host announced that it was Guo Lu's solo time. I was surprised because Guo Lu didn't tell me that he had prepared a program, and I didn't know he could sing.
Guo Lu came on stage, dressed very smartly. In his tuxedo, Guo Lu looked like a British gentleman. The girls in the audience could no longer hold back their excitement and started screaming.
Guo Lu stood in front of the microphone, bowed, and said, "Thank you very much for coming to today's party. Guo Lu is not talented , so I will sing a song next, which is dedicated to the girl I like."
The whole audience was in an uproar, and some people who knew about this looked towards me. I was a little nervous, not knowing what Guo Lu was up to.
Moreover, Lin Xiaolun and Ding Chuchu were sitting next to me.
As soon as the prelude sounded, my palms began to sweat. The prelude of this song is so familiar, Eason Chan's "Waiting for You to Love Me", Lin Xiaolun especially loved listening to this song when he was in high school.
Guo Lu closed his eyes, and all the lights in the room fell on him.
"Waiting for you to love me, even just once is enough, waiting for you to love me, maybe just once can make it last forever..."
Guo Lu's voice is very similar to that of Eason Chan. When he started singing, his hoarse and lazy voice attracted screams and applause from the audience.
This is what is meant by "kneeling down upon hearing one's words".
Guo Lu's voice strikes my heart again and again. I am even afraid that the song will stop, because once it stops, I don’t know how to face what happens next.
Such a blatant gesture always requires a response.
I turned my head to look at Lin Xiaolun, he was lowering his head.
I didn't realize when the song ended, but thunderous applause brought me back to reality.
Guo Lu looked at me on the stage , his smile like a spring breeze, warming the winter snow.
"Le Le, I'm sorry to make you feel rushed. I've been waiting for the day when you love me, waiting for the day when you can look back and see me accompanying you. I impulsively thought that I should have waited for it, right? Le Le, we haven't known each other for a long time, but I have truly watched you grow up step by step. Your every smile and frown is treasured in my heart, taking root and lingering. I want to protect you and take care of you. I hope you can give me this chance, just once."
I sat in my seat in a daze, and the whole place was silent.
Everyone was waiting for my answer, but my mind was blank and I didn't know what to do.
Guo Lu's kindness to me, as well as the memories of Lin Xiaolun, all violently attacked my mind, catching me off guard and unable to cope. Suddenly, the figure of Lin Xiaolun in a white shirt when he was young appeared in my mind. I chased him with a smile, and he slowed down to wait for me to catch up, then listened to me silently with a smile.
My eyes moistened, and I turned to ask Lin Xiaolun: "What do you think?"
Lin Xiaolun was stunned, obviously not expecting me to ask him.
"Just think of it as me asking you one last question." I was a little anxious, looking forward to what kind of answer Lin Xiaolun would give me.
Lin Xiaolun said softly: "Lele, Guo Lu is fine."
A bitter smile slowly emerged on my face. Lin Xiaolun, should I thank you for not telling me to accept Guo Lu's confession?
You are so tactful and kind.
I wiped my tears and stood up.
In the huge auditorium, I stood out from the crowd, but my mood was very complicated.
Guo Lu was still waiting for my answer, but I didn't want to deceive myself or hurt him.
I asked: "Senior Guo Lu, how many hearts do you think a person has?"
"One." Guo Lu's voice came through the microphone and everyone could hear it.
I smiled and said, "I only have one heart, so I only have one heart to entrust to you, and I can't find a second one for you." When I said the last sentence, I still couldn't hold back my tears.
I didn’t want to hear what Guo Lu was going to say next, so I bowed hastily and fled from the audience in a panic.
The wind outside made my cheeks hurt, and I ran forward desperately, not knowing where the end or the destination was.
I'm just afraid that the people behind me will catch up with me and crush me like a flood or a beast, making it hard for me to breathe.
If I stay in there any longer, I will really die.
I don't know how long I ran, but I gradually felt the pain in my legs. When I rested, I was out of breath.
I looked around and realized I had run off to somewhere unknown.
What was originally an extremely sad thing became particularly childish and stupid at this moment.
The wind on the roadside was particularly strong, which made me a lot more sober.
Sometimes, I inexplicably want to indulge myself, to be wanton, and then find a better reason to justify my recklessness. It is still the same now.
I looked up at the bustling street and found myself walking into a bar street. I looked at the time and it was already 9 o'clock in the evening. Normally, some bars would have opened at this time.
I randomly found a bar and went in, only to see the owner giving a lesson to their promoters on how to effectively promote drinks.
A waiter came over and said politely, "Hello, Miss. It's still 19 minutes before the official opening. Would you like to sit in our lobby first?"
I ignored him and walked straight to the bar: "No, just give me a glass of wine now, the stronger the better." After saying that, I sat on the stool with a firm attitude.
The waiter was a little embarrassed and turned to ask the boss.
I guess the boss agreed, so he asked me to wait.
I seemed to have thought of something, so I stopped the waiter who was about to leave and said, "Tomorrow, three cups first."
The waiter was a little surprised, and then obediently asked the bartender to make it.
I know Tomorrow is very strong. When I was a child, I secretly drank my father's Tomorrow and slept for 16 hours. When I woke up, my mother chased me and spanked me.
Because Tomorrow is very strong, I have to finish it in one gulp. When I wake up, it will be tomorrow. I pinched my nose and drank 3 cups of Tomorrow in one breath. My throat was burning and I couldn't speak.
I cursed myself for asking for trouble, paid the bill, and left in embarrassment. Before I got drunk, I flipped through my address book, trying to call someone to pick me up, but after looking through all the phone numbers, I couldn't find anyone.
It’s impossible for me to find Guo Lu again.
I yawned, and with shaking hands I flipped through Gao Hu's phone number. When I thought of that big, stupid guy, I couldn't help but want to laugh. I found a park to wait in, and called Gao Hu to tell him the address.
I sat in the gazebo, leaning against the pillar, wrapping my clothes tightly, and as expected, I fell to the ground half an hour later.
I don't remember anything, and I don't know when Gao Hu sent me back. When I woke up, there was a hot, wet towel covering my forehead, and my mother and Guo Lu were pacing back and forth in the room.
Fortunately, I arrived home safely.
When I thought about this, I sat up suddenly and stared at the person in front of me: "Guo Lu?"
"Are you awake?" Guo Lu's smile was still so gentle, as if everything that happened last night was just a dream. I rejected him in front of so many people, and now he appeared in my room to take care of me when I was drunk.
"No, why are you here?" I took off the hot towel on my forehead and asked in confusion.
Guo Lu said to his mother, "Sister Qin, Lele doesn't seem to be awake yet, and doesn't welcome me to come over."
"No, welcome." Mom said quickly, "She's drunk and confused, please be considerate."
"Mom, you are confused ." I got up from the bed angrily, but as soon as my feet touched the ground, I fell down.
Guo Lu helped me up and said helplessly: "Can't you just take a good rest?"
I had no face to see Guo Lu, so I had to make up an excuse: "I need to go back to school to thank Gao Hu."
"No need, I'm here. What do you want to say?" Gao Hu appeared at the door wearing a chef's hat and flour on his hands.
Did I travel through time? What on earth is going on?
"Le Le!" As a voice rang out, I was about to collapse. Yang Yang and Pei Ya were here too. Are we skipping class together?
I climbed back into bed and said weakly, "I'm tired, you all should go out."
My mother came over and said to me in a very inconsiderate way : "Lele, it's already 11 o'clock in the morning. I specially invited your good friend to have lunch together, so you have to get up and dress up, okay?"
I covered my head with the quilt and said, "Mom, you are sick."
My mother laughed twice, then stepped out consciously.
Guo Lu hadn't left yet, and I felt the edge of my bed sinking deeper.
"LeLe?" He was calling me.
I didn't dare answer him, nor did I dare to lift the quilt.
"It's okay, Lele." Guo Lu comforted me softly, "In fact, I know what answer you will give me. I don't mind. Time is so long, it's not that I can't wait."
I hid deeper under the quilt, unable to utter a word.
I don't want to let Guo Lu down at all, but the more persistent he is, the more I feel I owe him.
Why can't people just be willing to be together? This one-sided love is confusing, but the authorities still enjoy it.
This is true for me and for Guo Lu as well.
Fate always loves to play tricks on people, but people never obey fate. Fighting against it will either make you physically and mentally exhausted, or you will see the light.