Chapter 8: Dust in the Flame 02
As I expected, Jiang Sijin's case was closed very quickly. She has paid the price for what she did, and there is no need to pursue her criminal responsibility. What makes me sigh is that Li Anran, who was hit by Jiang Sijin, will be paralyzed from the waist down for life because of the serious injury. Perhaps this is God's retribution for him.
Because there were immediate family members around, the hospital wouldn't let me take Jiang Sijin away for burial, so I had to contact Jiang's mother.
Aunt Jiang had signed the divorce agreement long before Uncle Jiang got into trouble. She left as soon as Uncle Jiang got into trouble. She abandoned Jiang Sijin when she needed family company the most. For so long, she has never contacted Jiang Sijin, as if she had never given birth to a daughter like her.
When I called her and told her about Jiang Sijin's situation, she was silent for a long time before asking me for the address of the hospital.
When I went to Jiang's house to play when I was young, I saw that Aunt Jiang was always indifferent to Jiang Sijin and was not close to her. Jiang Sijin was distressed and sad because of this. By chance, Jiang Sijin and I accidentally overheard Uncle Jiang and Aunt Jiang talking, and then we knew that Aunt Jiang did not love Uncle Jiang, and it was Uncle Jiang who forced her to marry. Later, Jiang Sijin didn't care anymore. For many years, the biological mother and daughter were like the most familiar strangers.
But when I saw Aunt Jiang standing like a puppet and crying in front of the breathless Jiang Sijin , I felt that she also loved Sijin.
But Jiang Sijin will never know again.
Jiang Sijin was too young, and according to our custom, there is no funeral for those who die young. Aunt Jiang simply cremated her and sent her back to her hometown, and placed her grave next to Uncle Jiang's.
It rained heavily on the day of the burial, as if God was also sad for the passing of this young life.
Lin Zhan was accompanied by Lin Xiang. But in just a few days, he became as thin as a bamboo pole, and his eyes lost their spirit. When Jiang Sijin was buried, he cried again, and I couldn't help crying too.
Before leaving the cemetery, Aunt Jiang gave me the phone that Jiang Sijin used, and said to me, "Shuchen, you are a good child. Auntie is very grateful that you have always been by Sijin's side, being her good friend and taking care of her. Sijin's father did a lot of wrong things, but he is no longer here. When a person dies, all grudges are gone. Auntie also hopes that you will have a smooth life in the future. There are words that Sijin wants to say to you in the phone. She probably wants you to hear them."
I didn’t understand why Aunt Jiang suddenly mentioned Uncle Jiang to me. I didn’t think much about it. I took the phone without hesitation and held it in my arms like a treasure to protect it from the rain.
Lin Zhan and Lin Xiang were not in a hurry to return to Li City. He told me that he wanted me to take him to see the places where Jiang Sijin stayed and the school she attended when she was a child, walk the same paths she had walked, and eat the same things she had eaten.
I nodded and agreed.
That night, I let Lin Zhan and Lin Xiang live in my house. Lin Zhan slept in the room where Ning Qiyuan had slept before, and Lin Xiang slept with me.
While Lin Xiang was taking a shower, I found my headphones, took out the recording that Jiang Sijin gave me on her phone, and listened to it quietly by myself.
"Shuchen, this is probably my last words. Forgive me for not looking for you or answering your calls these days, because I can't face you anymore. Do you know? I have been very tired during this period of time. Although I am alone abroad, far away from this sad place, I can't sleep all night. As soon as I close my eyes, everything that happened between Li Anran and I is in front of me. I went to see a doctor, and the doctor said that I have depression, which is very serious. I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to worry about me. How much I loved Li Anran before, how much I hate him now. The woman named Xiao Yu told me that my father's disease could actually be cured at the beginning, but it was Li Anran who spent money to let the doctor on duty in the prison ignore my father, making my father's disease more and more serious . He said that my father deserved it, and that dying early was the ending he should have..."
When she said this, Jiang Sijin's voice began to tremble, with a hint of crying and hatred.
My heart also tightened.
I can't imagine how heartbroken she was when she found out about this. The two people who once loved each other so much became enemies because of family hatred.
"Shuchen, maybe after you know what I did, you will think I am stupid and that it is not worth it, but I no longer have the desire to live, and my future life is full of despair. My mother doesn't want me, my father left me, my lover hates me, and my children don't want me to be their mother... Shuchen, my heart hurts so much that I can't breathe..."
In the recording, Jiang Sijin finally cried, and my tears fell with her. Although I have always been by her side, I am not the one who has experienced these things. I cannot fully empathize with everything she has experienced. The only thing I can do is to cry with her who is still alive during the recording. There is nothing else I can do.
We don’t have the ability to predict what will happen in the future. We can only cry and regret after suffering, but these are the most useless things in this world.
At the end of the recording, Jiang Sijin kept saying sorry to me. She said she was sorry for the friendship we had growing up together and that she was destined to leave with such an ending. If there is a next life, we will still be sisters.
But do we have another life? If so, we probably won't know each other anymore, right?
Just like an article I once read, there was a sentence in it: In the next life, whether we love each other or not, we will never see each other again.
Before going to bed, I received a call from Ning Qiyuan. He asked me when I would return to Li City so that he could pick me up.
Yes, Ning Qiyuan did not come back with me, and I did not let him come. Ever since the quarrel in front of the police station that day, my relationship with him has become much colder.
I told him that Lin Zhan and Lin Xiang would be staying here for a few days, but I didn't expect him to suddenly raise his voice and say to me: "You are not their babysitter, you don't need to take care of them so much, they are adults and can take care of themselves."
I was a little annoyed by his yelling, and said coldly: "Qi Yuan, I will take care of it myself."
"Shuchen, can you please listen to me?" Ning Qiyuan softened his voice, as if begging me.
My heart ached, I closed my eyes, and said sadly, "Because I listened to you, I didn't have time to find Sijin, and now she is gone forever. Qiyuan, do you really think that what you said and did was right?"
On the other end of the phone, Ning Qiyuan was silent, and I could only faintly hear his somewhat rapid breathing.
After a long time, he just said: "Tell me when you come back." Then he hung up the phone.
I listened to the busy tone coming from the receiver and stared blankly at the ring on my hand. I felt that the light reflected from it was completely cold.
"Sister Shuchen..." Lin Xiang, who had fallen asleep, suddenly called me. I turned around and saw her bright eyes. She was not sleepy at all.
"If you are in trouble, Lin Zhan and I can go by ourselves. Nothing will happen." Lin Xiang said cautiously.
Because of the family business, Ning Qiyuan now has a very distant relationship with Lin Xiang and Lin Zhan. That day in the hospital, Ning Qiyuan didn't say a word to them, as if he had never known them before.
If Jiang Sijin hadn't gotten into trouble, I probably wouldn't have been able to see them.
"It's okay, I'm familiar with this place. There's a legend that 49 days after a person leaves, their soul will still wander around the world. They'll go to places where they once lived. Maybe we can feel Jiang Sijin's presence in those places."
Lin Xiang seemed to be hesitant to speak, but finally nodded.
