In the blink of an eye, Sun Qing's birthday is coming soon.
Su Jingnian and I went shopping together, planning to buy a birthday present for Sun Qing. After choosing for a long time, we couldn't find any unique gift, so we gave her a plush doll for her to hug while sleeping in the winter.
Sun Qing didn't look . I asked her if something unhappy happened. Sun Qing explained that she was just worried about her grandma.
On Sun Qing's birthday, she invited a few good friends to sing and eat together, and Su Jingnian and I were among them. While singing, I suddenly realized that there was no birthday cake, so I took Su Jingnian to choose a cake.
Only half an hour had passed, and when I came back, Sun Qing was already having fun in the private room .
Seeing me coming back, she smiled and handed two glasses of wine to me and Su Jingnian, and said drunkenly, "My best friend, congratulations on finding true love. Today, neither of you can escape, let's drink a cup of wine together."
I shook my head and said I didn't drink.
Sun Qing insisted, "I'm so happy today, you must give me some face."
Su Jingnian was about to snatch the glass of wine that Sun Qing handed to me, but Sun Qing dodged it and emphasized, "This is a wedding wine, and each of us must drink a glass."
I was so embarrassed that I had to take the wine glass and drink with Su Jingnian. The people in the private room were still making a noise, shouting, "Kiss, kiss..."
I waved my hands in embarrassment. I really couldn't kiss in front of so many people.
Su Jingnian looked at me with burning eyes, suddenly hugged me and gave me a gentle kiss on the lips. The people in the private room cheered loudly.
I stood there in a daze, my thoughts a little confused, and inexplicably thought of Zhuang Li's domineering and emotionless kiss.
Su Jingnian smiled calmly.
Sun Qing turned around twice with the bottle in her hand and said with a smile, "Today, we won't leave until we are drunk !"
"Don't go home until you're drunk!"
I don't know if she's drunk or not, but I feel a little dizzy, and I see double when I look at people. Su Jingnian held my hand and asked softly, "Are you okay?"
There are so many Su Jingnian in front of me, and I don’t know which one is the real one.
I didn't know I couldn't drink that much, so I said honestly, "I feel a little dizzy."
Su Jingnian's alcohol tolerance was not very good either. I heard him answer in my ear: "I feel a little dizzy too. Let's go sit on the sofa for a while."
Later I fell asleep on the sofa and have no recollection of what happened afterwards.
When I closed my eyes and fell asleep, I didn't know that there was a pair of vicious eyes staring at me in the darkness, as if I was the last person who should be in this world.
I was awakened by a rumbling car sound. Looking at the lights on the ceiling, I gradually regained consciousness, but my headache was splitting.
I got up from the bed and looked at everything unfamiliar around me. For a moment I had no idea what was going on.
I remember getting drunk last night, and then...
How did I get here? I had no idea. This seemed to be a hotel. Neither Sun Qing nor Su Jingnian were there. I rubbed my dizzy head and went to the bathroom to wash up. The person in the mirror had messy hair and a pale, haggard face, like a 40-year-old woman.
I washed my face hastily, packed up and left. When I passed by the hotel counter, the girl at the counter said with a smile: "Your boyfriend is so handsome."
Su Jingnian is indeed very handsome, no wonder other girls are crazy about him.
"Then do you know where he went?"
The little girl shook her head.
Since I couldn't get an answer, I had to take out my cell phone and call Su Jingnian. The phone showed that it had received a MMS message from Su Jingnian.
When I opened the MMS, my expression changed completely.
My hands holding the phone were shaking, and my heart seemed to be shattered by the sudden lightning.
In the photo, Su Jingnian was bare-armed and hugging another girl. But the girl's face was too blurry to tell who she was. However, I was sure it was Su Jingnian, and there was no sign of retouching in the photo.
In my heart, Su Jingnian was purer than snow, how could he do such a dirty thing? But everything in the photo made it impossible for me to deceive myself.
Tears of sadness fell on the phone screen, the photo was so glaring.
Should I ask something? What if I ask and it turns out to be true?
My mind was a mess.
Having lost Zhuang Li, I don't want to lose Su Jingnian from the bottom of my heart. After all, being with him is so happy, I don't want happiness to become a bubble and then burst.
I would rather remain silent as long as I don't lose Su Jingnian.
With a nervous mood, I called Su Jingnian.
"Where are you?"
"I'm behind you."
When I turned around, I saw Su Jingnian standing not far away, also with a haggard face. His eyes were still red, maybe because of that girl...
I dare not think about it any further.
Su Jingnian walked over and said with an evasive look, "The hotel you were staying in was full, so I found another one nearby."
Should he reveal his hand next?
But he didn't. Su Jingnian still held my hand as usual and asked if I was hungry and what I wanted to eat.
I struggled to pull away, but finally gave up the idea and just whispered that I wanted to go back to the dormitory to rest.
Su Jingnian held my hand and refused to let go. He whispered, "A Yin, do you like me?"
I looked into his dim eyes and asked back, "You are so outstanding, everyone likes you."
When he heard my answer, a hint of sadness appeared in his eyes.
"A Yin, as long as you are by my side, that's all."
Su Jingnian smiled bitterly. I don't understand why he is so disappointed and sad even though he betrayed me.
Maybe he felt guilty, so he treated me better than before and agreed to all my willful requests unconditionally.
I asked him why, and he said, "Only if I treat you better will you stay with me..."
His tone couldn't be any more humble. How could this be the glorious Su Jingnian? Perhaps it was because of his humble tone, or perhaps it was because of what he said, I couldn't help but lean over and kiss the corner of his mouth, and said arrogantly: "Su Jingnian, you can only belong to me, Ding Lanyin."
People should have a chance to be forgiven, I consoled myself over and over again. Su Jingnian just took the wrong road, or he was just drunk, and everything that happened was not intentional.
I excused Su Jingnian in this way just so that I could feel better and continue our love. His kindness to me was enough to make me deceive my own heart.
Before I knew it, all the memories were left with Su Jingnian.
We walked hand in hand through every inch of the campus together. We were also recognized as the school's most popular couple. Every night, we would talk on the phone for a long time, as if we had endless things to say. We promised each other that we would always love each other until we grow old.
In those memories, there is no longer a person named Zhuang Li, and even in the dreams there is only Su Jingnian.
I don’t know if this can be considered love, I just know that I can’t live without him.
When I was walking back to the dormitory hand in hand with Su Jingnian, I saw Ding Xuan from afar. He seemed to have grown taller, and his facial features were tougher. He was smiling, but when he saw Su Jingnian beside me, his expression suddenly froze.
He frowned at me and asked in annoyance, "Who is he?"
Su Jingnian extended his hand in a friendly manner and said with a smile: "You must be Ding Xuan, I am your brother-in-law."
Ding Xuan stared at me, with no intention of extending his hand, as if he was being upset. I pulled his arm and changed the subject, "Why are you here?"
Ding Xuan pouted, looking very cute: "You haven't been home for a long time, I came to see you."
I tapped his forehead and said, "Dear brother, you are already a senior in high school. If your mother knew about this, she would definitely scold me to death."
"I don't care." Ding Xuan squeezed in between me and Su Jingnian and pushed him aside. "Ding Lanyin, why did you change your boyfriend again?"
I had mentioned Zhuang Li's matter to Su Jingnian before, but he didn't say anything. Seeing that he looked normal, I didn't say anything more.
Ding Xuan talked a lot about family matters. He was originally happy, but when he talked about Mu Lianru, he lowered his head.
"What happened to your mother?"
"My mother...she seems to be with someone else..."
I'm not surprised at all that Mu Lianru is with someone else. She's still young and beautiful, so she won't end up alone. But I'm more curious about who she's with, so I asked, "Have you seen that person?"
Ding Xuan shook his head and continued , "I know I shouldn't stop her, but I really can't accept it..."
I understood what was going on in Ding Xuan's heart, so I didn't say much and just patted his shoulder comfortingly.
That day, Su Jingnian and I took Ding Xuan for a walk around the school, and then went to the back street of the school to eat. During the whole process, Ding Xuan was not happy with Su Jingnian, and Su Jingnian did not mind at all.
After sending Ding Xuan away, Su Jingnian said lightly, "Your brother doesn't seem to like me very much."
I was also lamenting in my heart, wondering what kind of boyfriend I should find to satisfy Ding Xuan. Ding Xuan sometimes behaves like a child, and even I can't do anything about him.
I hadn't looked for Sun Qing since the last birthday party, and I didn't know how much she drank that day. The day after sending Ding Xuan away, I went to look for Sun Qing, but the people in her dormitory said she hadn't been to class for a few days. I hurriedly called her, fearing that something had happened to her.
But no one answered the phone after calling countless times.
My heart seemed to be tightly entangled by vines. When I rushed to her house, I thought of countless possibilities, and the one I was most afraid of was that something happened to her while she was racing.
When I hurried to her house, I didn't see her, but I saw the bald man squatting at her door, smoking impatiently.
I ran over in two or three steps and asked anxiously, "Where did Qingqing go?"
The bald man threw the cigarette butt to the ground, stomped it out, and said, "I've been squatting here for three days and haven't seen her."
"What on earth happened?" I had a bad feeling in my heart.
"Her grandmother died..."
She didn't even tell me such an important thing.
She must be in pain now. She grew up with her grandmother, who was her only relative. But now, her only relative is gone, and Sun Qing has become an orphan. I understand that feeling too well, as if she is the only one left in the world, and even breathing has no meaning.
Baldy said that Sun Qing hadn’t been to the repair shop for a long time. I couldn’t find her anywhere, so I had to go back to school.
Late at night, Sun Qing called and said she was waiting for me on the rooftop of the teaching building. Sun Qing seemed to have drunk a lot of wine, and even her tone of voice was drunk.
After sending a text message to Su Jingnian, I rushed to the rooftop. Sun Qing was sitting on the floor, wearing a miniskirt that showed off her long legs. She didn't mind exposing herself at all, she just drank alone, tears in her eyes, and her face was already a little drunk. The floor was full of empty bottles, and the air was filled with a strong smell of alcohol.
She was holding a glass of wine and pouring it down her throat. I hurried over and snatched the glass away.
"Don't drink anymore..."
Sun Qing turned around, stared at me intently, and said coldly: "Ding Lanyin, can you put away your hypocritical face? You will only make me hate you more."
I never expected these words to come from my good friend. I could only stare at her blankly, not knowing what I had done wrong. The Sun Qing in front of me was so unfamiliar that it was unbelievable.
Sun Qing laughed sarcastically: "You have that innocent expression again. Our school beauty Ding is like a pure white lotus." Every word she said was full of sarcasm.
I asked hesitantly, "Qingqing, what's wrong with you?"
"I have liked Su Jingnian for ten years. Ten years! Do you know how sad that is? I tried so hard to catch up with him, but you took away this happiness without any effort. Ding Lanyin, every time I hear you talk about how loving you and Su Jingnian are, it tears my heart away." At this point, Sun Qing was already in tears.
I was shocked by what she said for a long time. I was so slow that I never knew that Sun Qing liked Su Jingnian, so I agreed to be his girlfriend. I didn't want to show off in front of Sun Qing, but I still hurt her badly. I felt extremely guilty, lowered my head, tears like a flood, and said in a hoarse voice: "I'm sorry..."
Although saying “I’m sorry” too many times won’t help, I still sincerely apologize.
"Ding Lanyin, please give Su Jingnian to me, I beg you. You have been with Zhuang Li, you are no longer clean, and you are not worthy of the clean Su Jingnian. Please give him to me, okay?" Sun Qing suddenly grabbed my hands, her eyes full of pleading.
She pinched my wrist and it hurt, and I frowned and said nothing.
"Not good." Su Jingnian's voice sounded behind me.
I turned around and the moment I saw him, I felt inexplicably relieved.
I don’t know how to face such a crazy Sun Qing. Maybe Su Jingnian can handle it more appropriately.
He strode over, took my hand, looked at Sun Qing, and said slowly and firmly: "I'm sorry, I like Ding Lanyin."
After hearing the last few words, the light in Sun Qing's eyes seemed to disappear. She stepped back in despair, shaking her head continuously, muttering to herself in disbelief: "You were so good to me, and you were willing to lend me money..."
I held Su Jingnian's hand and winked at him, asking him to stop provoking Sun Qing. But he continued, "I just treat you as my sister. From the beginning to now, I have never had any feelings for you. You are a good girl, and you will definitely find someone who is better and more suitable for you than me."
Sun Qing immediately cried and retorted loudly: "No, I only love you in this life!" She wiped her tears desperately, ran to the edge of the rooftop, bent over and shouted fiercely: "Su Jingnian, either you like me, or I will die."
My heart was in my throat.
The wind blew up Sun Qing's long hair and lifted her skirt, and her posture carried a kind of desperate and sad beauty.
Su Jingnian rushed over in fear, trying to hold Sun Qing back. But Sun Qing refused to come over. During the scuffle, I watched Su Jingnian fall off the rooftop.
The scene was like a slow-motion movie, filling people's hearts with greater despair and fear. That night was so quiet that I could even hear the sound of Su Jingnian's body rubbing against the wind.
There was a loud bang, as if a big hole was smashed in my heart, and bright red blood gushed out.
Sun Qing stared at her hands in a daze, unable to believe what she had just done. She screamed Su Jingnian's name loudly and stumbled downstairs.
I looked at the empty rooftop. Su Jingnian had just been holding my hand. His warmth still remained on my hand, and his gentle voice was still in my ears, as if what had just happened was just a dream.
Sun Qing's shrill screams still irritated my eardrums, reminding me that this was not a dream. All my strength was drained out of me, and I knelt on the rooftop. The color on my face faded little by little, and gradually became numb. I looked at the place where Su Jingnian had just stood with empty eyes, opened my mouth, and wanted to shout his name, but the three words were stuck in my throat and I couldn't shout them out.
It was as if someone was performing heart surgery on me, cutting all the blood vessels and peeling my heart out of my body. The pain was unbearable.
Some people say that every mistake deserves a chance to be forgiven.
But some mistakes will never be forgiven, and they should never be forgiven. They will only have retribution, which will follow.
For example, losing your closest friend forever, or accidentally killing the person you love most.