When the clock struck twelve, I took out the last bottle of beer from the refrigerator and gulped it down.
At this moment, Yu Bing's phone rang. It rang about a dozen times before he finally hung up unwillingly.
I lay lazily on the sofa, daydreaming quietly.
I don't know since when, my conversations with her always end in quarrels. I don't understand, is it because I don't know how to get along with her, or is her way of getting along too complicated?
At this time, I thought of the little daisy again.
Yes, I call her Daisy in my heart. This has always been a secret in my heart, but I forgot when this secret was born.
I haven't contacted her for a long time. She has cancelled her Weibo account and never logs on other chat apps. She is like an old man living in seclusion, quietly fading from my life. But until she faded away, I realized that I missed her so much.
It is really a terrible fact that a man who is about to get married is actually thinking about his closest friend.
In fact, this feeling has troubled me for a long time. It is like a moldy potato, rotting deep in my heart, but I can't pull it out.
I often dream about her, dreaming about that day when I pressed her under me and kissed her, dreaming that I did not stop and we kissed intimately like that.
After waking up, I immediately took a cold shower, then sat on the edge of the bed, staring at Yu Bing's sleeping face. At this time, my guilt was as deep as the sea, and I wished I could dive into it and never wake up.
To resolve this matter, I chose not to contact her anymore.
But Yu Bing still doesn't trust me, which is really sad. She has always been a strong woman, even when she was pursuing me.
I don’t know if it’s because I inherited my father’s genes, but like him, I have always been unable to resist extremely beautiful women.
The night we went on a business trip with Yu Bing, we did what we had to do.
I think all this was probably related to the fact that I drank a lot of wine that night. Because when I was sober, I was still thinking about what kind of gift to bring to Daisy, but when I woke up the next day, I just felt like the sky was falling and the earth was cracking, and I forgot all the previous worries.
Just like that, Yu Bing and I quickly got together. Now it seems more like a long-planned rain, which poured down without hesitation when the time was right.
At first, this seemingly playful relationship was really sweet.
We were on a business trip together for a month, going in and out together, eating and living together, just like a loving couple. Under the impact of this sweetness, I completely forgot about the little daisy waiting for me in another city. Men are always forgetful creatures, even I despise myself.
The first thing I saw when I got back to the company was her. She looked at me and Yu Bing in shock, her face pale. The folder in her hand fell to the ground. Seeing her panic, I wanted to rush over to help her. But Yu Bing glared at me fiercely and pulled me away.
In Yu Bing's heart, Pei Jixing will always be the deepest grudge. She always asks me, is there really nothing between you and Pei Jixing?
we are very good friends .
How many times do I have to tell you before you believe me?
This has always been my fixed answer, but today, even I don’t believe it anymore.
Three days ago, I finally met her again at the Guanyin Temple.
I had imagined many scenes of our reunion, but I never thought I would see her there. Yu Bing pulled me to pray for our marriage with her. After the prayer, she ran to ask the monk for amulets. I was alone, wandering around the temple.
It was at this time that I met her.
She was wearing a dark grey woolen coat, with slightly curly hair gently draped over her shoulders. She and Tang Tang held hands, talking and laughing. She seemed to have become a little rounder, with a rosy face, and looked very healthy.
I don't know why, but I suddenly felt that my little daisy had grown into a lily that bloomed in the wind. She was pure and beautiful, like a stream of fresh air among the chaotic crowd. It seemed that she was doing well after leaving me.
Thinking of this, I don’t know whether to be happy or sad.
Before I knew it, I had followed her for quite a distance, but I still didn't have the courage to go up and say hello to her. I was afraid of seeing her flustered eyes, and even more afraid of seeing the cold and distant emotions in her eyes.
I lit a cigarette, leaned against the tree, and watched her greedily like a peeping tom.
I found that I had never looked at her carefully. She was very shy, so she looked a little lonely, but when she faced familiar people, she would always raise the corners of her mouth habitually, as if she could listen to you seriously.
Her eyes are neither too big nor too small, and her eyes are as clear as a child's. When she smiles, her eyes naturally bend into crescents, which is extremely cute. She seems to have grown a lot taller than when she was in high school, but she still looks soft. If you hold her in your arms, you will be reluctant to use force for fear of crushing her.
It seems that although she is not a common beauty, she is exactly what many men want.
But what I didn’t expect was that “many men” appeared so quickly.
When the man appeared in my sight, I couldn't help but stand up straight.
In my 20-plus years of life, it was him who made me know what jealousy is. Yes, he was Chen Jialing, the guy who was better than me in every way and whose life was smooth sailing as if it was written by someone. He was the cousin of my first girlfriend, and it was because of him that I broke up with her.
For a long time, I considered him my enemy, but he fell in love with my best friend.
Sometimes, boys can understand each other with just a glance.
I don't know when he set his eyes on Daisy, I only know that he didn't look at any other girls except Daisy.
However, Daisy was like a little fool and knew nothing about this.
After so many twists and turns over the years, he still chose to return to her.
Watching Chen Jialing and Xiao Chudai talking face to face, a sense of crisis suddenly surged in my chest. I stabbed out my cigarette in annoyance, wondering whether I should show up at this time.
Yu Bing came back to me at this time. She excitedly put her arm around me and showed me the amulet she had asked for. But I became even more annoyed and just nodded perfunctorily.
When I turned around to look for Daisy again, I found that she and Chen Jialing had disappeared together.
I think if someone took a picture of my expression at this moment, it would be the same as the expression that Daisy had when she saw Yu Bing and I together.
At this moment, I finally understood the trivial tortures she had endured over the years.
Actually, I have always known that she likes me.
But for so many years, I didn't know how to accept her feelings. The most comfortable distance was to be friends, so I just muddled along. But this most comfortable distance made me more and more uneasy, and eventually, it turned into pain.
I didn't go home at night under the excuse of work.
I stayed in the office alone, staring at the computer.
Actually, the company's affairs are not very busy recently, I just want to find a time to be alone. However, people are always like this, the more space you give yourself, the more you will think about some messy things, for example, I thought of her again.
Finally, I couldn't help it and dialed her number.
This was the first time I called her in such a long time, and it was also the first time in my life that I was so nervous about calling a girl. But the funny thing was that this girl was someone I was so familiar with.
Thankfully, she answered my call.
The moment I heard her voice, I breathed a sigh of relief. In fact, I didn't know what to say to her, but no matter what, I really missed her. I wanted to see her, talk to her, and take a good look at her.
I know, I'm a scumbag.
But I can't control my inner thoughts at all.
All this is so torturous, God knows how hard it is for me.
However, everything was not as smooth as I thought. She did not chat with me as I expected. Instead, she seemed absent-minded, and her tone was polite but distant. She no longer took the initiative to care about me and ask about my well-being. No matter what I said, she just said softly, "Oh, I see."
Finally, our conversation ended hastily.
Listening to the busy tone on the other end of the phone, I froze there, at a loss. In all the years I had known her, she had never treated me like this.
In the end what happened?
This question troubled me all night and kept me awake. But soon, I found the answer.
Sure enough, it was because of Chen Jialing.
That boy, oh no, it was a man, he broke into her life like a sudden plague, invading her everything. He actually took her to the Salem Western Restaurant. Daisy didn't like Western food very much, every time I yelled for her to accompany me, she would go.
They sat together like a couple, and she actually looked quite happy.
I was a little angry for no reason, and at this moment she finally noticed me. Almost instantly, I put away those depressed emotions and looked at her greedily and attentively.
Oh, she is so pretty.
Why didn't I realize she was so pretty before?
Yu Bing pushed me hard at this moment and pulled me to sit down. She was wearing a mink coat that matched my suit, red lipstick, and big earrings, looking as if she was going to a party. She raised her eyebrows and looked at me unhappily.
I suddenly lost all interest in eating. She looked at me, and I looked at her as well. I suddenly didn't understand why I was so impulsive and agreed to be with her.
The meal was tasteless and when I was about to leave, I finally stood opposite Daisy.
I know that my scumbag nature has started to play tricks on me again. If Yu Bing hadn't been holding me back, I might have really been unable to resist and just walked away with Daisy. As for Chen Jialing, really, seeing how smug he was, I really wanted to give him a good beating.
Just when I was gathering up the courage to say something , Little Daisy did something that hit me hard. She said some face-saving words to me very rationally and coldly, then took Chen Jialing and strode away, leaving me dumbfounded.
At this time, Yu Bing said sarcastically, what are you looking at, she is already taken.
For some reason, the anger that I had been suppressing completely ignited.
I don't want to argue with her. Of course, as her fiancé, it is wrong for me to look at other women, but now, I don't want to get married anymore.
At least, I don't want to marry her.
Since we decided to get married, she and I went from having a quarrel once a week to a small quarrel every three days and a big quarrel every five days.
Sometimes when I was so busy with work, she would rush into the office to find me. I once asked her why she was so devoted to me despite her good conditions. She laughed so hard that she fell backwards, and then said confidently, because you are the only one who I think is worthy of me.
But, I'm sorry, you are not the person I want to spend my life with.
That night, I didn't go to her house but went back to my mother's place. I turned off my cell phone and concentrated on eating the noodles she cooked for me.
For some reason, she didn't look happy today, and even looked a little sad. After holding it in for a while, she finally spoke.
"I went to Pei Jixing's house today." She ignored my shocked expression and continued, "I was very grateful to Xiao Pei for bailing you out, so I personally gave her the invitation."
"As a result," she sighed, "her mother treated me as an enemy when she saw me."
Hearing this, I put down my chopsticks and lost my appetite. "Mom, why are you acting on your own? Pei Jixing and I have a complicated relationship. If you go like this, won't you be making him unhappy?"
"Xiao Pei was not at home, so her mother received me." She looked regretful.
"Is her mother angry after hearing that I'm getting married? Does she think I've delayed Pei Jixing?"
She shook her head. "That's what I thought, so I went to her house to give it to her. I also planned to tell her not to give her any money as a gift. But before I could say anything, her mother pulled the gauze off her face and showed it to me, pointing at the scar and saying, 'That's all because of you.'"
"Thanks to me?" I had a bad feeling.
"Because I told her that Xiao Pei bailed you out, she found out that Xiao Pei was not at home that night. She sneaked out for you and turned off her phone because she was afraid her mother would find her. At that time, the house happened to be on fire. Her mother thought Xiao Pei was at home, and she rushed to find her without waiting for the fire department to arrive. As a result, she burned herself like that."
After saying that, my mother covered her chest with a worried look, and said with a choked voice: "Son, our family owes them too much. Mom now regrets sending them invitations. This is simply cutting flesh from their hearts!"
"If her mother hadn't taken advantage of my kindness towards Xiao Pei, she would have kicked me out long ago. How could I do such a sin?"
"Hey, Xiaoyu, where are you going so late?"
Without caring about her calling me, I picked up my coat and left, and the scorching liquid flowed from my eyes as if I was walking on a heat wave.
I wiped it off, rushed downstairs, and drove away.
It was not until this moment that I realized that I was the stupidest person in the world.
Because I missed a girl who was so good and loved me so much.
She has loved me for so many years, never asking for anything in return, even though she has endured so much for me and ruined her life because of me, she never said a word.
I turned the steering wheel and ran on the road, tears still flowing down my face. I can't accurately describe my current mood, which is shock, guilt, sadness, fear, heartache, and pity.
I finally understood why she left me and ran into the arms of another person.
This is all my own fault, she shouldn't feel sorry for me.
Following the route I remembered, I finally arrived at her house.
Standing at her door, I was so nervous that my palms were sweating. I knew that maybe her mother would open the door, or I would be kicked out. But no matter what, my heart was beating so hard because I wanted to see her.
Finally, I mustered up the courage and knocked on the door.
What surprised me was that the person who opened the door was actually Pei Jixing. She was wearing baby pink pajamas, with her hair lazily draped, like a soft kitten. The moment she saw me, she looked at me as if she was frightened. By the time she reacted, I had already hugged her tightly in my arms.
She said in a hurried voice, pushing me and shoving me, "Lu Mingyu, let me go, let me go."
At this moment, I was like crazy. I would do anything to win her back. I swear, if her mother hadn't rushed out at this moment, I would have kissed her long ago.
When her mother saw me, she picked up the broom and rushed towards me. Pei Jixing took the opportunity to push me away and stood in front of her mother. Her mother was so angry that she seemed to explode. She waved the broom and hit me hard. I didn't hide, but stood there obediently and let her hit me.
No matter what, I just like Pei Jixing and I just want to be with her.
Pei Jixing didn't know where she got the strength from, but she pushed me out, then pulled her mother's broom over and threw it aside, then pulled me out and slammed the door shut.
"Snapped."
The world is finally quiet.
Looking at her arm that was red from being beaten, I couldn't help but hold it and want to rub it for her, but she dodged me mercilessly.
"What are you doing here?" she asked in great confusion.
"I..." I looked at her speechlessly. I had so many things I wanted to say to her, but I couldn't say a single word.
Seeing that I didn't move, she pushed me anxiously and whispered, "I just locked the door. If she comes out later, she will break your legs. Go away!"
With that, she urged me to go downstairs.
"Then you have to answer my call before I leave!" I was like a child who was eager to get candy and was throwing a tantrum.
She thought about it and nodded.
My heart was at ease at this moment, and then I did something I had never thought of. When she wasn't paying attention, I pulled her over and kissed her hard on the face.
Now, I seem to be no different from those hooligans out there.
But I don’t care about that. I want to shout downstairs, Pei Jixing, I like you and I want to be with you.
"Lu Mingyu!" She pushed me away fiercely, her face red like a crab that had just been soaked in water, "Stop messing around, and leave!"
I smiled at her foolishly, nodded and said, "Okay, okay."
I quickly went downstairs in two steps, and the heavy feeling in my heart seemed to disappear a little.
I know I must be crazy, but I can't control this crazy self.
I think I have always loved her, but because she is right next to me, I have never thought of turning around and holding her hand.
I just sat in the car, lit a cigarette and started smoking.
Everything should come to an end.
I am willing to bear all the consequences, even if it means I will be torn to pieces.
To show my respect, I chose to call Yu Bing. After calling several times, the call was finally connected.
The noise over there was very loud, and I knew she was drinking in the bar.
After being with her, I realized that she was not the elegant lady I imagined, but like Cheng Duo, she loved to hang out in nightclubs. Every time she quarreled with me, she would go out to drink with a group of friends, and I had already gotten used to it.
"Hey, what's up?" she said casually.
In fact, she no longer loves me as much as she did at the beginning. She chose to stay with me because she felt that I was the only one who deserved her. In two months, she would be 28 years old. I was indeed her best choice.
"I have something to tell you, but you're busy right now, so I'll tell you over the phone."
"Oh, okay, go ahead."
"I don't think we are suitable for each other. Let's break up before we start preparing for the wedding." I said these words calmly, and the other end of the phone suddenly became quiet, leaving only the noisy music from the bar.
After a long time, the call was suddenly hung up.
I know this is a sign of impending storm, but I don't care.
While she was still here, I ran to her place, packed some things, and then went back to my own apartment.
I lay alone on the sofa, finished the last bottle of wine, and thought about my Pei Jixing.
I couldn't disturb her now, the matter was not resolved. Maybe Yu Bing would come and bang on my door in a little while. But in fact, when I slept until noon the next day, nothing I expected happened. Something that caught me off guard happened mercilessly.
Tang Tang posted a status on Weibo. In fact, Tang Tang, a top student, rarely posts status updates, so her rare appearance caught my attention.
It was a photo of four people. In addition to a strange man, I also saw three familiar faces, Tang Tang, Chen Jialing, and Pei Jixing, who was leaning on Chen Jialing's arms and smiling as sweetly as a flower. I looked at the time when the photo was posted, and it was just now. A nameless anger rose up, and I directly found Pei Jixing's number and dialed it.
Once, twice, no one answered the phone.
The third time, the call was finally answered, but the person who spoke to me was Chen Jialing. He knew it was me, so his tone was full of hostility.
"What do you want with her?" he asked.
"It's none of your business, let her answer the phone." The feeling of panic came up again and I began to get impatient.
"I'm her boyfriend. It's none of my business if you look for her." He sneered.
"Whether you are her boyfriend or not, you need her to admit it herself." I slammed my fist on the table, but I didn't feel any pain at all. I just felt chest tightness and shortness of breath, which made me crazy.
However, Chen Jialing was too lazy to answer me and just hung up the phone.
When I called again, his phone had been turned off.
Damn it!
I slammed my phone on the table and untied the tie I had just tied.
Chen Jialing, I won’t forgive you!