Volume 4: It's Dark, Please Close Your Eyes Chapter 74: It is easy to cook fish, but difficult to cook yourself
"What?! Master, if you have anything on your mind, just say it out loud and let us all cheer you up... Uh, no, no, you should say it out loud and let us all comfort you. How can you commit suicide, and use such a cruel method as boiling yourself? Don't do that. If you really can't, just boil me to vent your anger. Anyway, I can come back to life..." After hearing what Tang Zheng said, Tang Xiaotang hurriedly tried to persuade him, even at the cost of her own life.
"What nonsense are you talking about? How can I be so upset? But come to think of it, your suggestion seems not bad. Make you into a dish, an evolved version of a certain island country's female body mori, a loli girl mori? When people are about to start eating, suddenly the Phoenix Blood Thorns activate, and the dish turns into a living person, scaring those Far North Demon Butterflies to death?" Tang Zheng suddenly propped up his head and started to think.
In the picture, Xiaotang was made into a fish and chips shape. When those northern demon butterflies surrounded him, a starlight shone, and Xiaotang was reborn...
"Well, it still doesn't work. You still have no way to control the activation timing of the Phoenix Blood Thorns. That is to say, even if you are made into a dish, the dish can't be kept fresh at all. You will turn back into a living person in minutes. Except for scaring me, you can't scare anyone else." Tang Zheng quickly drove Tang Xiaotang's suggestion from his mind.
"Then what do you want? No matter what, you can't do that to yourself. If you cook with me, you will fail at best. But if you cook with yourself, you will lose your life." Tang Xiaotang continued to stop Tang Zheng's crazy ideas.
"Stop, stop. What are you talking about? You've completely led me astray. Now, listen to me and no one is allowed to interrupt!" Tang Zheng crossed his hands, stopping everyone's rebuttals and suggestions, and prepared to have the final say.
Seeing that everyone finally stopped refuting his crazy idea, Tang Zheng began to explain slowly: "When I said I would make myself into a dish, it was just a way of saying it. I'm not really going to be eaten by a Far North Monster Butterfly. I just made myself look and smell like that dish. No need to cut, boil, or fry. Don't worry, I promise that even if I make myself into a dish, it will be a living dish, a dish that can kill monsters. Then when those Far North Monster Butterflies come to eat me, I will just jump up and break their knees... no, wings, on the spot. Then everyone will rush over to deal with these difficult and slippery monster butterflies. Do you understand?"
Everyone looked at Tang Zheng's expectant eyes and finally nodded in unison.
Tang Zheng saw that everyone finally understood what he meant and he let out a long sigh. He couldn't help but sigh inwardly, this person had such a big imagination, just like being too handsome, it really added to his troubles in communicating with others.
"Master, you are so creative. However, if you had said this earlier, wouldn't we have understood it? A dish that can kill monsters sounds very exciting. But how do you plan to make this dish?" Tang Xiaotang directly asked a very critical question.
The dish has a name, but where is the recipe?
This question really stumped Tang Zheng: "Well, this still needs some research. Don't worry, with my cooking talent, this won't be a problem."
In the next few days, Tang Zheng quickly discovered that his boast was not so easy to fulfill.
Cooking for yourself is really a big problem.
In order to research and solve a dish called "Fish and Chips with Extra Ingredients", Tang Zheng finally understood what it meant to have white hair that is getting shorter and shorter by scratching it. He was so annoyed that he wanted to scratch his scalp off, let alone white hair.
The original dish, dry-fried swordfish with French fries, is actually a very simple dish, so simple that even the people of Great Britain, who were almost isolated from gourmet food in their previous lives, can easily cook it.
However, this time the ingredients of the dish were increased from swordfish and French fries to swordfish, French fries, and Tang Zheng.
It was the addition of this ingredient, Tang Zheng, that made the chef worry so much.
First of all, Tang Zheng’s ingredient cannot be cut or chopped. It must be kept intact and fresh from head to toe after cooking, so it is very troublesome to handle.
Then on this basis, the shape, smell and even the temperature of Tang Zheng's ingredient must be completely concealed, so that the perfect taste of fish and chips can be used to attract the arrival of the Far North Demon Butterfly.
Otherwise, with the sharp five senses of the four-star and above Arctic Demon Butterflies, it would be difficult to deceive them. This is a delicacy, not a trap mixed with unknown additives.
So, during the days when Tang Zheng was conducting various experiments, the other bored people's daily activities turned into martial arts practice, watching Tang Zheng commit suicide, continuing to practice martial arts, and continuing to watch Tang Zheng commit suicide... in a cycle.
These days, Tang Zheng's appearance and taste are changing at an exponential rate.
Sometimes, when everyone was practicing, they would suddenly smell an extremely bad fishy smell, and then they would see Tang Zheng wrapped in a northern swordfish skin, with only his head exposed, vomiting crazily...
Sometimes, when everyone was practicing, they suddenly smelled the delicious aroma of fried fish, and then saw Tang Zheng grinning, covering his arm frantically, rushing to the pool, and inserting his arm, which had been fried to a crisp on the outside and tender on the inside, into the water to cool down...
Sometimes, when everyone was practicing, they suddenly heard a loud bang and then saw Tang Zheng hanging upside down on a tree branch, with burnt French fries hanging all over his body...
"Master, how about... forget it. In this case, we might as well practice to five stars here first, and then go catch the Arctic Demon Butterfly. If you continue like this, I'm afraid that when Xu Qingyan wakes up in the future, he probably won't recognize who you are. Well... he may not even be able to smell who you are..." Tang Xiaotang looked at Tang Zheng with tears in her eyes and advised him earnestly.
"No, no, no, I just don't believe that. Is it so difficult to just make myself into fish and chips? I'm Tang Zheng, a top goldsmith, a five-star warrior, a forging master, and a cooking guru. I can't even cook myself. How can I be the protagonist of a novel?!" Tang Zheng raised his head to the sky, his eyes full of heroic tears. Then, without looking back, he continued, going from the fire to the pot.
…
Just like that, after several days, Tang Zheng's style and taste became more and more diverse. But slowly, his whole temperament and smell were getting closer and closer to fish and chips day by day.
"Hahaha, haha, I...I finally succeeded, hehehe, everyone stop and take a look, I succeeded! I succeeded!"
It was another sunny afternoon, and everyone was practicing hard, trying to improve their strength so that they could exert more strength in the subsequent hunting of the Arctic Demon Butterfly. After all... under the strong visual and olfactory stimulation of Tang Zheng cooking themselves crazily, everyone felt that if they didn't work harder, they would be sorry for Tang Zheng and themselves.
When everyone suddenly heard Tang Zheng's joyful shout, they looked at each other. Tang Xiaotang was the first to react. He jumped up and ran towards the source of Tang Zheng's shout, and the others followed closely behind.
When everyone arrived at the scene, they didn't see Tang Zheng anywhere. Instead, they saw a huge bowl of fish and chips piled in the middle of a clearing in the woods.
"Master, Master?" Tang Xiaotang walked around the big plate of fish and chips, but couldn't find any trace of Tang Zheng.
"Hey, didn't I bury myself completely in this pile of French fries?" Zheng Qian suddenly opened a pile of French fries, but still didn't see any trace of Tang Zheng, and he was stunned on the spot.
"He should be hiding in a fish, but the sizes of these Arctic swordfish seem to be a little off. He should not be able to hide Tang Zheng." Hua Yingxiu also joined the research team out of curiosity.
Just when everyone gathered around the huge plate of fish and chips, suddenly the plate of fish and chips exploded like a fountain. In the rain of chips, a figure suddenly jumped out, touched everyone's face, then rushed to the side laughing, with his hands on his hips, looking extremely happy. Upon closer inspection, who else could that person be but Tang Zheng.
"Master, where did you come from?"
"Uh, Boss, why do you look so yellow? And your aura is actually completely integrated with this plate of fish and chips. Awesome!"
"Tang Zheng, how on earth did you do it?"
Facing everyone's surprise and questions, Tang Zheng kept a mysterious smile on his face and said proudly: "Hehe, all..."
"Oh, okay—" Everyone nodded in unison, then turned around and prepared to go back to continue practicing.
Looking at the backs of the crowd, Tang Zheng suddenly became anxious: "Hey, hey, hey, don't you want to know how I did it?"
"Yes." Everyone nodded.
"Then beg me, and I will tell you if you beg me."
"Master, didn't you say it was a secret?"
"Uh...we are friends. This is a secret between you. Please beg me, and I can still tell you." Tang Zheng said seriously.
"Okay, please, go ahead." Everyone pretended to listen attentively.
“Please, please have some thought when asking for help. That’s all. Do you know that it’s easy to cook fish but hard to cook yourself?… Do you know how uncomfortable it is to be buried in French fries and fried fish every day?… Do you know that I will be exposed as soon as I turn on the star power, and I will be scalded to death if I don’t, what a paradoxical situation this is… Do you know that I have almost run out of potatoes after studying them? I’ve been thinking of using tomatoes instead…” Tang Zheng suddenly turned into Xianglin Sao, blabbering on and on about his pain and sorrow. However, in the end, no one could hear how Tang Zheng managed to completely merge himself with a plate of fish and chips.
All we need to understand is that he did it, after countless blood, sweat and tears, he did it.
"Next, it's time . Let them know that my plate of fish and chips is not so delicious!" Tang Zheng concluded viciously.
"Well, what you said is good, boss. By the way, boss, after we catch the Arctic Demon Butterfly, can you get rid of this state of smell and taste that perfectly blends with fish and chips? I feel uncomfortable when I smell this smell every day." Zheng Qian asked innocently.
Hearing this question, Tang Zheng's smug look froze on his face. He slowly turned around with a look of despair on his face: "I still don't know how to remove it. I still... need to study..."
Before he finished speaking, his body was shaking violently and he choked with sobs and lost his voice.
