Volume 10 Bugs Chapter 84: Masturbation
"What is that thing!" Niu Baiwan shouted in horror, pointing ahead.
Ahead, an extremely huge steel cloud covered most of the sky and was approaching us. Perhaps because of its huge size, it seemed to be flying very slowly, as if it was drifting leisurely in the sky. Only when you saw the thick barrel in front of it becoming clearer and clearer did you realize that this huge thing was approaching us at a speed far exceeding the speed of the aircraft we were riding.
The name of this thing is "Destroyer IX-S081 Air Fortress". I have to say that, as its name suggests, its size is not inferior to that of a real fortress. It is a huge aircraft that is almost semicircular. The two sides of the arc serve as its wings, which are several miles wide, and its thickness is as high as two or three floors. The top of the arc should be its front end, and the thickness here seems to be even thicker. It is tightly wrapped by countless layers of solid black metal armor to protect its safety. On its belly and both sides of the wings, there are many forward-moving gun ports and some things that look like small aircraft that can explode, exuding a dignified killing atmosphere.
What was terrifying was that a huge mechanical hatch opened at the rear belly of its cabin, and a number of small combat aircraft of ordinary size were flying out from there continuously, swarming towards us like locusts.
"This is too perverted! You can't play tricks on people like this!" Niu Baiwan was scared to death by the huge monster that attacked him with a tremendous force!
"What the hell is this? Striker 1945 or Super Boss Bee?" Chang Sanjiao's eyes almost popped out.
"You're kidding... You're kidding. The leader bee has bombs in addition to bullets. Where are our bombs?" Ding Ding Xiaoge slammed the control panel and cursed, "We thought we were playing 'If you're a man, you have to hold out for a hundred seconds' by landing on the beach..."
"Never mind, I just think of it as playing Bubble Bobble and Zuma Frog!" Fei Yin rolled up her sleeves fiercely, revealing her two white arms, then glanced at the group of useless men with disdain.
"The fighter jets are coming!" Yan Zhen reminded us.
"Missiles, they're launching missiles!" Red Wolf aimed at the approaching powerful explosive flying weapons - I just learned that thing was originally called "missiles" - and controlled the turret to sweep them desperately. Although he reacted quickly and blew up most of the missiles in mid-air, there was still a fish that slipped through the net and hit the outer shell of our aircraft. A violent shaking followed, causing everyone to scream in embarrassment.
"Comrades, I lowered the resolution, the target looks bigger and easier to aim!" Ding Ding Xiaoge shouted.
"Oh damn, why didn't you say so earlier!" A group of people suddenly became flustered and didn't know what they were doing.
"Changgong, there are too many here, I can't handle it all, please help me masturbate quickly!" Chang Sanjiao howled at the top of his lungs.
"Oh my god! What do you mean by 'help you shoot down planes'? That's so fucking disgusting!" The dwarf priest Longbow Shooting Sun bravely swept the enemy planes approaching the Yangtze River Delta, shooting them down into billowing smoke, while he kept cursing!
"Shoot down the stupid planes! Shoot down the missiles!! Shoot down the missiles!!! The destructive power of missiles is too great. It won't matter if a small plane gets hit by them twice!" Red Wolf's voice sounded like he was killing a chicken.
"Nonsense! Missiles are system-generated weapons. You will never be able to shoot them all in your next lifetime! Shooting down planes is the right thing to do! Once the planes are shot down, the missiles will be gone!" The president shouted.
"Fire the missiles!"
"Masturbate!"
"It's safe to fire missiles!"
“It’s fun to masturbate!”
"Fire missiles to ensure survival..."
"Masturbation is good for your physical and mental health..."
…
Just as these guys who lacked a sense of tension were fighting each other in a panic and arguing over the question of whether to shoot down planes or missiles, the largest gun muzzle at the lower front of the sky fortress gradually changed:
First, some red dots of light appeared out of nowhere around the muzzle, and then I saw them begin to move toward the muzzle, gradually condensing into a large red ball of light. The red dots of light became more and more numerous, and the speed of convergence became faster and faster. When the diameter of the ball of light became almost the same size as the muzzle of the gun...
"Boom!" With a deafening roar, a ferocious blood-red beam of light shot out and headed straight for us. This dangerous beam of light was so thick that it was almost three times thicker than the entire cabin of our aircraft. I doubted whether we would be lucky enough to leave any wreckage if we were hit.
Fortunately, at this critical moment, our dwarf driver demonstrated his excellent driving skills. The aircraft rolled three or four times to the left, brushing past the edge of the light column containing immeasurable destructive power, and passed without a scratch.
"……" The huge impact caused by the spectacular scene displayed by this extremely dangerous weapon made my friends stunned at the same time . For a moment, the cabin was silent. I guess everyone was frightened by the huge beam of light.
"Well..." I suggested cautiously, "...should we destroy that thing first?"
…
Wise suggestions tend to be supported by everyone, especially when there are sufficiently convincing facts in front of them - in terms of size, this convincing power is extremely large - in front of the dangerous red light, everyone immediately realized that the thick and long thing under the big guy is in danger of killing us with one blow, and the only thing we can do now is to kill it before it blows us into pieces - the sooner the better.
I immediately turned my gun around and aimed at the gun barrel below the sky fortress, and fired in that direction with fear and anxiety. My companions also turned their guns around, and more than a dozen bright light bullets were fired from different positions, hitting the outer wall of the huge sky fortress, blasting it with flames.
Although our attack looked powerful, it had little effect considering the durability of the aerial fortress. Seeing the dangerous red energy gathering near the muzzle again, I was so anxious that I wanted to throw the joystick away and rush forward to chop it hard with two swords.
Well, I admit that even if I really had the chance to do so, I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to pry off even a single nut on it.
We were lucky. The powerful main gun missed three times in a row. Just when it was about to fire the fourth beam of light, we finally succeeded in destroying it. As my last beam of light hit the target, the red light points gathered at its muzzle suddenly twisted strangely, and then many cracks appeared on its body, and red light leaked out from these cracks. The leaked red light became thicker and brighter, and seemed to be desperately pouring out, tearing these cracks bigger and bigger. Finally, the entire body of the gun could not withstand the strong tearing, and finally fell apart with a burst of explosions. The huge main gun finally disappeared, and a huge hole was blown in its original position. A stream of terrible black smoke mixed with electric light and sparks came out of the hole in an endless stream.
"Yeah! We got rid of it!" There was a burst of joy in the cabin, and each of us was excited about the destruction of this great threat.
Although we have eliminated the biggest threat to us, our situation has not fundamentally improved. The enemy planes that fly like locusts and the missiles that fly everywhere are constantly eating away at our durability, and the artillery fire pouring down from the air fortress has made our defense even more stretched. Now, the exterior of our aircraft is scarred, and even the wings that ensure our safe flight have been torn into pieces. Billowing smoke is swirling outside my cockpit. I feel like we are sitting on a burning broom, and I don't know when it will fall.
The worst thing is that due to the lack of a shooting position like Xiange Yayi, our defense has some blind spots. Although I have the widest field of vision at the top of the aircraft and can control the cockpit to fire in all directions, aiming takes time. I simply cannot shoot down all the enemies attacking from all directions in a short period of time. The actual situation is that I often lose sight of one thing while aiming at another. When I aim at the enemy plane on one side, the enemy plane on the other side has already appeared and fired at us frequently.
Soon, the durability of our aircraft has been reduced to a very dangerous level. If there is no better way to reverse this situation, I am afraid it will be difficult for us to avoid falling to our deaths.
"I have something in my heart to say, please don't blame me for being a pessimist..." Niu Baiwan said loudly with a sad face.
"If you know it's a jinx, don't say anything!" Fei Yin scolded loudly.
"I can't help but want to say..." Niu Baiwan frowned, "...To be honest, I have a very bad feeling this time..."
"I knew you were going to say that again!" Nocturne in B-flat minor said angrily, "Every time you say that, it's always bad news!"
"I said that because something bad happened..." Niu Baiwan defended himself aggrievedly.
"The bullets are so dense, my eyes are dizzy..." Ding Ding Xiaoge fumbled around in the cockpit, looking for something nervously, "...Is it really impossible to place mines?"
"Xiange Yayi..." When President Feiyin mentioned this name, she gritted her teeth, giving people the feeling that she wanted to bite him to death, "...After the group is wiped out this time, I have to give him a good beating when I get back. I will make him pay for it until the next century! Yanyan, please don't stop me."
"Well, I dismantled his computer and made him kneel on the memory stick!" Yan Zhen was obviously also very dissatisfied with Xiange Yayi's desertion.
"Why should I kneel down to a memory stick?" Chang Sanjiao was clearly dissatisfied with Yan Zhen's punishment. "It doesn't hurt to kneel down flat on your back. Yan Zhen, you are just too soft-hearted!"
"I mean to stand the memory upright and make him kneel..." Although I don't know what she meant, Yan Zhen's voice sounded gloomy.
The Yangtze River Delta shuddered suddenly, shrank its neck and remained silent.
…
Although my comrades did not give up resistance, it seemed that they had given up all hope in this battle. I really hope that I can look at life as open-mindedly as they do, and get rid of the shackles of death in this world and gain greater freedom.
But I can't. I only have one life, so I can't give up the desire to live, and I don't want to throw my life away in this future. Although I am in a desperate situation, I still have to struggle hard and make a dangerous attempt for myself and my friends.
I let out a long breath, and gradually calmed down my mind. Everything around me became increasingly blurry, as if it was moving away from me, yet also as if it was merging with me. The world gradually lost its colors, and then even its shapes. When I focused again, the endless green digital symbols had already swallowed me up like a tide.
Although it sounds very mysterious, it actually only takes a short moment to do it. I entered the source world in this battle of steel and fire, and faced the laws of the world.
After training from old Carlson, I found that I was actually much more powerful in the source world than in the concrete surface world. Here, I could see everything happening around me at a glance, from the floating of a speck of dust to the movement of the entire earth. I could find clues from this vast sea of bytes.
Just like now, it took almost no time for me to find the fields representing the enemy planes and missiles - not just the range within my field of vision, I can clearly know the operation status of every enemy plane and every missile on this huge battlefield.
Here, this world has no blind spots for me. I have a pair of all-knowing eyes, staring at every corner here.
Three enemy planes are attacking from the left, right and below. The one on the right will arrive first, but its beam cannon will miss, so I can ignore it for now. The one below will fly over the right front wing 2.29 seconds after the one on the left. Unless I can shoot it down in the first place, I will not be able to deal with the missile fired from the sky fortress.
I didn't wait for the enemy plane on the left to start circling before I shot it. Although I didn't shoot it down, my shot had changed its flight path and it would not pose any threat to us for the time being. After 15.25 seconds, I would have the opportunity to hit it again, and that would be the end of it.
After firing the cannon, I turned the cockpit to the right and fired a beam of light at the empty front. As expected, the enemy plane appeared right at the same time as the beam of light was fired. I saw with my own eyes that the data representing the beam of light rushed into the data representing the enemy plane, messing it up. I even had enough time to see how the data decomposed and deformed, turning into flames exploding in the air and metal fragments flying in all directions.
Three, two, one, fire—that missile is finished. In this world, I don't need to aim at all. My thoughts are so precise that I can even control the huge artillery fire to accurately hit the smallest rivet on the enemy plane. From the time I shot down this missile to the next threatening target, I even had enough time to fire two shots in a row to destroy a beam launcher on the huge fortress.
In this way, for several minutes, the durability of our aircraft, which was already very few, did not decrease at all, and my kill data and hit rate began to rise suddenly. At the same time, the durability of the enemy's air fortress began to decrease at an unprecedented rate. One beam launcher after another was destroyed, and one missile after another was shot down. And every time I fired, the powerful and slow-shooting beam cannon in my hand was as accurate and sharp as a crossbow in the hands of a sharpshooter.
In this case, the final victory or defeat is no longer determined by the accuracy of my shooting - I firmly believe that I can't miss. The most important issue is that I must choose the right target at the right time. You know, there are dozens of enemy planes and dozens of missiles flying in the sky every second on this battlefield. They are flying towards us from different directions, and there must be a certain order of priority. I must first eliminate those that pose no threat to us, and then sort the remaining ones, thinking clearly which one to attack first and which one to attack later, so as to match the time of its approach, the time of my shooting, and the buffer time of the cockpit gunfire charging. If I get the order wrong, it is possible that the enemy plane will be destroyed after it launches the beam cannon, or two enemy planes will fire at me at the same time, leaving me no time to react. For our now broken aircraft, every hit is a huge loss.
So you can know that although there are dozens or even hundreds of targets flying in the sky at the same time, there are only a few - or perhaps only one - that are the correct targets. You must decide your shooting targets in the most correct order, otherwise the chain reaction caused by a miscalculation may be a loss that you simply cannot afford.
It's like a game of untangling a ball of thread: the ball is big and messy, with many threads intertwined, but there is only one end. If you find it, all problems can be solved; if you miss it, you will pay the price of your life.
This is not easy, you know? The speed and amount of calculations required are beyond your imagination. Before I met Carlsen, I didn’t believe I could complete such complex calculations. Even then, I was actually terrified, fearing that a small mistake would put us in an irreversible situation.
But it seems that I'm doing a good job, at least there haven't been any mistakes so far.
You know, I should really be thankful that I was assigned to such a shooting position. Almost every shot of this huge beam cannon is fatal to the enemy planes outside. Only those enemy planes that are too far away can escape the threat of a fatal blow. This saves me from wasting a lot of time to accumulate damage during the shooting process, and also avoids a lot of trouble with time difference.
This is the first time I have demonstrated this ability in front of my friends who are into aviation. I don't know if it is right or wrong, and I don't know what kind of trouble this will bring me. However, I have to do it because it may be the only way to save my life. I can only pray that these guys will regard this as a coincidence, an accident or something else that is not worth making a fuss about, so that we can live through this peacefully and forget about it together.
"Fuck, admit it, Jeff, you're cheating..." Red Wolf looked at my rising kill data and shouted in disbelief, "...If you say that this hit rate is a fluke, I'll jump out of the plane right now."
Well, it is really a luxury to expect these curious babies to ignore all these abnormal changes.
"You said so, so go ahead ." I think that if you want to dispel a person's curiosity, it is best to let him think according to his own understanding, let him think he has figured out the matter, so that he will lose interest; and if you use a clumsy way to cover up the facts, then their keen observation and strong curiosity will make the truth you are trying to cover up invisible. So, I hesitated and let his imagination run wild.
"Jeff, where did you find this plug-in? Does it cost money? If not, send me a link so I can try it..." Changgong Sheri rubbed his hands excitedly.
"I agree with you, Jeff. You're so cool..." Niu Baiwan also shouted.
"You guy, you had this good stuff but you didn't take it out earlier. You made me so worried that I thought we were going to be wiped out!" Feiyin was very dissatisfied with me.
…
"Just forget about it. It's good enough to shoot this big guy down. Don't think too much!" I immediately stopped their curious questions, and while evasively declined, I increased the pace of shooting, and was always alert to the movement of various data in the source world. I didn't know whether entering the source world in front of the airborne people would expose my whereabouts in front of the gods, and I didn't know what form their punishment would take. I could only be vigilant and be ready to escape at any time, and at the same time hope that this damn big guy would be destroyed as soon as possible.
Where do these guys get so many weird questions? I thought with some resentment in my heart...
Although I didn't say anything, these guys seemed to believe that I must have used a magical device called "plug-in". Originally, they said that this device could help them make money, help them mine, help them kill monsters and level up, help them chat and pick up girls, but now they happily believe that this thing can also help them masturbate easily and happily.
Oh, I can only say that this is really a beautiful misunderstanding.
