DIARY Sixteen Missing you exists like air 1
Saturday, October 22, sunny
that person--
People who exist like air,
Someone who can't breathe without him.
Now he has turned his back on me.
Now it no longer lights me up,
It doesn't concern me anymore.
Obviously, there are people who do better than him now.
There is someone who can make me happy now.
Gradually, my popularity in the class began to change.
Weiwei and I would often do homework together, discuss the strange costumes of some classmates in the class, and go to watch the rehearsals of the Fly student band of Lingnan High School with great interest.
Maybe because of Weiwei, other girls in the class gradually approached me, and occasionally even passed notes to me in class and told me girls’ private secrets.
My study life seems to have become truly exciting from now on. Weiwei now goes to Lingnan High School almost every few days, saying that she is going to watch the rehearsal, but in fact she is going to see the guitarist Ajie in the band. I don't know how their relationship develops, but now every time I go there, Weiwei will hang around Ajie and ruthlessly abandon me.
So I felt that dragging me to watch the rehearsal was clearly a smokescreen for Weiwei's love life!
Xu Yi was actually very happy to see my indignation. He and Wei Wei often had very tacit conversations.
"Hey, coming to see Ajay?"
"Hehe, I brought Xia here."
"Ajie is practicing guitar over there and needs someone to serve tea and water."
"Xia said she was thirsty, you can take her to drink milk tea."
…
Many times, I have been betrayed in this way for no apparent reason.
Just like tonight, it's no exception.
"Come on, I've tried every type of milk tea in this milk tea shop." I muttered to Xu Yi in dissatisfaction, "Can you two come up with some fresh lines in your conspiracy?"
"What? You saw through it. Is the intention obvious?"
"Is it difficult? You two are singing the same tune as if you were performing a double act."
"It's not difficult, but it's difficult considering your IQ."
"You mean I'm stupid?" I threatened him with my eyes.
"That's it. Idiot! Haha."
I was stunned, time and space changed silently before my eyes.
I seemed to see the jumping blond hair again, the heartless smile of that person, and his playful expression: "Idiot!"
Suddenly, my throat felt sore and my heart tightened.
I quickly lowered my head, and a tear from the corner of my left eye fell into the milk tea cup with a beautiful spiral straw.
Maybe it's because of my posture, or maybe it's because the left corner of my eye is closer to my heart than the right corner.
The crystal tears dripped into the light purple taro milk tea in the cup and spread silently.
"Xia?" Xu Yi, who was surprised by my quiet reaction, called me softly, "Eat quickly, or I'll leave you here."
"Hmm." My voice was muffled.
After a few seconds, I looked up and saw Xu Yi staring at me without blinking, the light in his eyes warm and concerned: "Are you okay, Xiya?"
"I'm fine. Xu Yi, thank you." I said softly.
Thank you for helping me find friendship, thank you for accompanying me to eat snacks even though you never eat sweets, thank you for your care and dedication all the time, thank you for accompanying me through the many days when I missed Yuan Cheye...
There are so many thank yous that I can’t express enough.
"Actually, what I want is not your thank you."
Xu Yi stared into my eyes with a sincere and serious expression.
My fingers curled up on my knees and my heart skipped a beat, but I still couldn't escape from his sight courageously.
There was an awkward silence for a few seconds.
"Haha, I found that Xiaya actually looks like an animal." Xu Yi suddenly chuckled.
"What?"
"hedgehog."
"Hmm? That's ugly."
"Whenever someone approaches you, you curl up protectively, with your thorns facing the other person."
"So why would anyone touch a hedgehog? It would hurt."
"Yeah, there are people who, even if it hurts, still want to get close to you."
"How silly..."
"Ye Xiya! You are deliberately hurting me, right?"
"No, haha."
…
Time is like quicksand in your hands, you can't hold it back and it just slips away slowly.
For a while, I attended an amateur painting class at school. Unexpectedly, my instructor later sent one of my paintings to participate in a city competition, and it unexpectedly won an excellent award.
The day when the winning works of the competition were exhibited happened to be a weekend, and Xu Yi asked me to go to the exhibition together. This seemed to be his first formal invitation. I hesitated again and again, but finally dragged Weiwei along, and asked Xu Yi to bring Ajie as well.
But later, when I was walking around the gallery and turned around to talk to Weiwei, I found that she and Ajie had disappeared.
"Haha, they went shopping alone a long time ago." Xu Yi smiled a little ambiguously and handed me a cup of hot milk tea.
"Love over friendship!"
"She wanted to give me a chance."
"Uh..." I started to be evasive again.
"Hey, here's your painting."
When I heard this, I stopped, turned around and saw him pointing at a familiar painting.
In the beautifully framed picture, looking from afar, you can see that the picture is covered with large patches of fiery red clouds, blooming as if they are burning, and there is a round white light falling on the horizon.
His thoughts seemed to be on fire as he recalled his lonely back and forlorn tone when he and Yuan Cheye were cleaning the playground.
"When the setting sun gradually descends to the other side of the clouds, the day slowly comes to an end. This is when everyone goes home...Hahahaha, the sunset at this time really looks like a painting I've seen before, by Anthony or something. Wow, the sunsets he painted are really this beautiful."
…
My heart tightened and I felt like I was suffocating.
"Hope? What a good name." Xu Yi looked at the notes under the painting carefully.
"Hope" is the name I gave to this painting.
I walked over, my vision a little blurry.
"Do you know what I'm drawing?"
"Sunrise."
"Why not a sunset?" I was a little surprised that he could tell the meaning of my painting in one sentence.
"Such a strong orange-red, burning and dancing like a flame." Xu Yi paused, "It gives me the feeling of a burning vitality, just like the nirvana of a phoenix, symbolizing the beginning of the rebirth of everything on earth."
He spoke very seriously, the lines of his profile were smooth and neat, and he had a resolute temperament.
"Haha, what? You just realize I'm handsome now?" Xu Yi turned around and couldn't help but teasing me when he saw me in a daze.
I didn't ridicule him unusually, my voice was a little low because I was lost in distant memories: "You look like a friend of mine, but you are so different."
"Hmm?" Xu Yi's eyes flashed with a dark light, and he waited patiently for my next words.
"It's the person I like, his name is Yuan Cheye." I don't know why, at this moment I really want to tell him the story about Yuan Cheye that has been buried deep in my heart.
"Yuan Cheye?" Xu Yi murmured the name in a complicated tone.
"Well, haha, it would be great if he could see this painting, so that he could also feel hope."
Then, would his back no longer be so lonely? Oh, I almost forgot, he should no longer be lonely now, right? Hasn't he returned to Jiang Shangxue's side...
Xu Yi had been listening attentively with a serious expression. Perhaps it was his expression that gave me the courage to continue: "I used to have an ear disease, and I often couldn't hear important words because of nervousness. Many people isolated me because of this, but Che Ye didn't. He has always brought me happiness. Later, he encouraged me to have an operation, saying that he would tell me the answer to a question after the operation. But after the operation... he left the city where we had lived together with his ex-girlfriend, but I still like him..."
I spoke slowly, my eyes becoming confused again: "When he said goodbye to me, I didn't want to hear a word he said to me. At that time, I wished I hadn't had the surgery and would never hear again..."
The heart-wrenching feeling in my memory is still there, and my eyes are slightly moist.
"You shouldn't think like that." Xu Yi smiled faintly, his smile was handsome and charming, "Because..." As he spoke, he grabbed my hand. The palm of his hand that had just held the hot milk tea was filled with reassuring warmth, which penetrated my skin.
I forced myself to relax and continued, "But after my ears healed, I was able to hear you sing, which made me glad that I had the surgery."
"Really?" There was a warm light flashing in Xu Yi's eyes, and the emotions hidden in them were almost bursting out.
I realized that what I just said seemed a bit ambiguous, so I quickly looked away and took out my phone from my pocket in a concealing manner.
The light blue frog pendant swayed slightly in the air.
"Haha, now I want to tell Yuan Cheye that the Xu Yi I know is a person with great potential to be a singing star!"
As soon as I finished speaking, Xu Yi was stunned for a moment and looked at me in surprise: "Are you still in touch with him? Have you looked for him?"
"Go find him?" I looked at Xu Yi with some doubt, then smiled bitterly, "He likes another girl, he and I... can only be good friends, hehe."
I think my smile must be very ugly, and you can tell from the deep pity and love in Xu Yi's eyes.
Xu Yi held my cheek gently with his hands and said softly but firmly: "Xia, I like you, and I will definitely do better than him."
I don't know if he said this out of jealousy, but I didn't stop him, perhaps because at this moment, I also needed a pair of warm hands.
After the exhibition, I still didn't see Weiwei, Ajie and the others. Xu Yi offered to take me home.
