Chapter 8: If you keep thinking about it, there will be a response Lu Shuang 06
The celebration banquet was held at a hot pot restaurant, which was doing very good business, with crowds of people and a bustling atmosphere.
A group of 6 people found a round table and sat down. I deliberately sat next to Shen Yuxi, but he was reading the news on his phone and didn't even look at me. Because the hot pot is self-service, you need to get all the ingredients yourself. I had to make myself feel a little more present: "Reporter Shen, what do you want to eat? I'll get it for you."
Shen Yuxi didn't even raise her head and said calmly, "No need, I can get it myself."
"It's okay, you can watch the news, and I can get you some food, that's very convenient." I continued.
I swear, I have never spoken so sweetly to anyone in my life.
Shen Yuxi put away her phone, curled her lips, and smiled politely: "No need, I can do it myself."
After saying that, he stood up and walked towards the food area.
I followed him, with an idea in my mind. There were things I really wanted to say, and I had been holding it in for so long, trying so hard, just to be able to speak my mind.
I am no longer the dark, decadent, and self-centered Lu Shuang I once was. I have become better and worked harder. Am I qualified enough?
"Reporter Shen...what do you think of my performance in this project?" I asked him tentatively.
"good."
Shen Yuxi put two slices of fish on the plate and answered as concisely as ever.
Such a simple answer was definitely not what I wanted. After thinking for a moment, I asked him again: "Has your impression of me changed now? I hope I haven't disappointed you."
Shen Yuxi paused, as if thinking about the right words, and then said: "In fact, I have always known that you have potential, but there are too many things in your heart that restrain you. I have been stimulating you before, just to dampen your spirit and polish you. Now you have entered the door."
Listening to Shen Yuxi's words, I felt a little excited, just like when I was a child and received a little red flower from my kindergarten teacher.
I haven't felt this way in a long time.
It's been a long time since I felt happy and laughed from the bottom of my heart.
After another long silence, I clenched the plate in my hand, my palms sweating: "Reporter Shen, what do you think of me?"
Upon hearing this, Shen Yuxi turned around and looked at me, his brows slightly furrowed, his eyes seemed to be asking about the meaning of this sentence.
"I mean... do you think it's possible for me to be your girlfriend?"
I didn't expect that the first confession in my life would be made in a crowded buffet. I held the plate in my hand in panic and said these words in fear.
I was looking forward to Shen Yuxi's answer, but at the same time I was afraid to hear his answer.
I hope he can nod, or even if he can't, at least tell me tactfully that I'm still young and that he doesn't want to consider feelings yet. Anything he says is fine, as long as it's not such a direct rejection.
But Shen Yuxi said without hesitation: "Impossible."
I seemed to be able to feel the trembling of my heart, and an indescribable pain. My hands shook and I almost lost my grip on the plate.
Shen Yuxi didn't care about my uneasiness, but added in a calm but affirmative tone: "I already have someone I want to hold hands with for the rest of my life."
I stood there, my face flushed, feeling like a fool.
Yes, how could God give me so much happiness? Shen Yuxi's love is just something .
I asked again: "Is it Yu Nansheng?"
Shen Yuxi did not answer, but just said: "I have taught you everything I can, and you should have saved up enough tuition fees. It's time to go back to school and register."
I was a little unwilling, and the stubbornness surged up from my heart again, fiercely swallowing up my rationality.
"Shen Yuxi! Tell me, what exactly am I inferior to her? She works hard, and I work harder than her. She is kind, and I also try to be kind. She is a flower in a greenhouse, raised by others. What about me? I have to work very hard to make myself slowly start to like this world. Why is it so difficult for me to get close to you, but you still don't even look at me? Don't you think this is unfair to me? You feel so sad when she left. I stayed and worked hard to be a reporter, but you want to drive me away?"
I know I'm being unreasonable. There is no fairness in matters of the heart.
Shen Yuxi put down the chopsticks in her hand, looked up at me, and after a long while, she said in a cold voice: "Lu Shuang, don't rely on your injuries to expect everyone to give in to you. Yu Nansheng's background is better than yours, it's destined, not her will. Do you remember the bonus I gave you last month?"
Of course I remember, it was with that bonus that I barely made it through last month. Otherwise, Lu Lan, Su Xin and I would all be homeless on the streets.
"In fact, the bonus you were given was only 500 yuan, and the rest was paid by Yu Nansheng from his own salary. I was afraid that you would have a psychological burden, so I was repeatedly told not to tell you.
"But I think there's nothing wrong with saying it out loud. At least it lets you know that she is better than you in some ways."
After saying this, Shen Yuxi walked back to her seat with her food tray and sat down.
My heart was pounding. First, I felt ashamed. I was clearly receiving a favor, but I still treated Yu Nansheng as an imaginary enemy. Second, I was annoyed. If I had known that the money was hers, I would definitely not have accepted it.
But Yu Nansheng had predicted this accurately, and that’s why he didn’t let me know. As a result, I accepted the money and wasn’t driven completely crazy.
In fact, I always knew where I lost, but I was just dissatisfied.
Later at the dinner table, I did n't eat much of the food. I just kept drinking and became a little dazed.
I suddenly remembered that on that rainy day, Shen Yuxi looked very gentle, and his voice was not as cold and hard as it is now. He said, "Why are you not going home in the rain? What are you doing here?"
He gave Lu Lan and I 500 yuan to survive.
He was so gentle with the child, but I never felt that kind of gentleness again.
As I was thinking, I started to cry, very quietly. It was very lively around me and everyone thought I was drunk and no one cared that I was crying.
I felt like I was thrown into a deep, cold pool, surrounded by suffocating water. Loneliness and embarrassment swarmed over me, wrapping me tightly and making it impossible to breathe.
