Chapter 757 Morning Thoughts
It snowed heavily overnight.
It only weakened slightly until dawn, and the clouds did not clear to reveal the bright moon.
But the sparse falling snowflakes obviously could not stop the young men and women who had been restraining themselves for a long time - before Aunt Xue even got up from the bed, she could hear the endless laughter and noise outside like silver bells.
She subconsciously looked beside her, but saw that Li Wan's bedding was neatly folded, and it was obvious that she had gotten up long ago.
That's fine.
Aunt Xue secretly breathed a sigh of relief. She had tossed and turned until the second half of the night, but she felt increasingly unsure about how to deal with Li Wan's twisted theories.
For some inexplicable reason, she did not call the servants, but quietly got up, dressed and washed. However, the noise she made still alarmed Suyun who was on duty outside.
So she simply washed and dressed with Suyun's help and sat in front of the dressing table.
Seeing that there was a goose egg-sized glass mirror inlaid above the bronze mirror, Aunt Xue could not help but move her eyebrows closer to take a closer look at the image in the mirror.
Even from a closer distance, only a few faint fine lines could be seen at the corners of her eyes.
But Aunt Xue couldn't help looking at it again and again. The more she looked, the more sad she felt, as if those lines as thin as hair were actually hideous scars.
At this time, another burst of cheerful laughter came from outside the window.
The voice was sweet, innocent and clear, and sounded like the breath of youth . But when it fell into Aunt Xue's ears, it sounded a bit harsh.
She stroked the fine lines at the corners of her eyes with her hands, feeling more and more melancholy. Suddenly, Li Wan's words from last night seemed to echo in her mind again.
Will I regret it?
Aunt Xue originally thought that she could firmly deny it. After all, what she wanted most was to be able to have children and grandchildren and enjoy the happiness of family.
But……
Will you really not regret it?
The image of Mrs. Wang's daily life flashed through my mind unconsciously.
Speaking of having children and grandchildren, my elder sister has obviously achieved her goal, but... is she really satisfied?
Even though her beloved Baoyu was by her side, and even though Lang'er was studying under a famous teacher and was obviously a promising student, had her elder sister ever been truly happy?
The one who always lingers in her mind is her brother-in-law Jia Zheng!
Even though she usually pretended to be indifferent, as her closest sister, how could she not know that she would always think of Aunt Zhao's name with gritted teeth every time she woke up in the middle of the night?
To be honest, although my brother-in-law Jia Zheng cannot be said to be loyal, he and my sister have been in love for more than ten years, which is much better than my own seven years of being together less and apart more than together.
However, even so, my sister is still full of resentment and wants to return to her former movie days.
And what about yourself?
I'm afraid I can't even remember what that dead guy looks like?
"Even if it's just once, let the man I love, a real man with flesh and blood, fill that empty space..."
The fallacy that Li Wan was interrupted by became clearer and clearer in her heart.
As these words continued to echo, it seemed as if something that had been sealed for a long time was breaking out from the bottom of Aunt Xue's heart.
"Real, flesh and blood..."
She murmured subconsciously and reached out to grasp the large conscience on her chest.
"Meet the Second Master, meet Uncle Bao."
Suddenly, a series of greetings came from outside the window. Aunt Xue's heart trembled slightly, and she stood up subconsciously, but when she turned around and met Suyun's surprised gaze, she quickly sat back down.
She tried hard to suppress it, but still couldn't help blushing.
What on earth were I thinking about just now?
This is so ridiculous!
She picked up the powder box awkwardly to cover up the abnormality on her face. But how could she cover up the abnormality on her face? But how could she smooth out the waves in her heart?
Seeing that if this continued, she really didn't know what would be revealed in front of others. Aunt Xue quickly suppressed her pounding heart and waved away Suyun who was beside her.
But after being alone, although she breathed a sigh of relief, the ridiculous thoughts that she had just suppressed came flooding out along with her pounding heart.
"Even just once..."
"A real man of flesh and blood..."
"The good years are gone..."
"Will you regret it?"
The echoes in my heart seem like the devil's temptation, or endless torture.
Aunt Xue touched the fine lines at the corners of her eyes again, and a sense of urgency that time was running out gradually came over her.
The next year, I will be thirty-seven years old.
How much youth can a woman of this age still have, no matter how well she takes care of herself?
Who knows, after a few snowstorms, the scenery will start to look withered.
Although she originally felt quite sympathetic towards Li Wan, she also despised her self-deprecating behavior.
But at this moment, thinking back to the noise he heard through the wall, and thinking about Li Wan's confused and nostalgic expression, he quietly began to feel jealous.
As a woman who had been widowed for many years, she was very cautious and did not dare to overstep the line. Not only did she experience the joy of being a woman, she also continued to maintain her reputation and status.
If she hadn't exposed herself, she might have continued like this for a long time, until she was no longer old, and then she would go to her children and grandchildren to enjoy the happiness of family life with a sense in her heart.
Why?
They are all widows, why is she the only one who can do this? !
Fear, disdain, jealousy, restlessness...
All kinds of emotions came flooding in, and Aunt Xue's heart was like a boiling pot.
It was not until the man's voice was heard again outside the yard that Aunt Xue suddenly woke up.
She hesitated for a moment, then went straight to the window, quietly opened a crack, and leaned forward to peek out.
The two men talking in the yard were naturally Sun Shaozong and Jia Baoyu.
Because they were quite far away and their voices were not loud, Aunt Xue could not hear what they were talking about.
But she is not interested in these.
Aunt Xue's eyes first fell on her nephew Baoyu with suspicion. After wondering whether he was an adulterer, she shifted her gaze to Sun Shaozong.
The tall and burly figure and the slightly ferocious eyes made Aunt Xue feel as if she had returned to the dense forest.
The scene that made me feel ashamed whenever I thought of it now seemed to have a different flavor, like a hint of sweetness mixed in with the sourness.
But that slight sweetness is enough to tempt people to dig deeper.
If at that time...
What would happen if Sun Erlang and I did not leave separately?
Thinking of this, the rude look in Sun Shaozong's eyes when he first met him several years ago came to mind...
Yes, he will probably do something!
Aunt Xue became more and more dazed, her breathing became heavy and her face flushed. The memories of the day in the forest seemed to have some incredible connection with what she heard through the wall yesterday.
It was as if the latter was a continuation of the former, and she was no longer an onlooker behind the wall, but a real person with flesh and blood...
"What is Auntie looking at?"
Just as she was unable to extricate herself from her fantasy and was sliding towards the entanglement of love and desire, a voice suddenly sounded from behind Aunt Xue.
Aunt Xue turned around , but who else could it be but Li Wan?
