Chapter 66 Fear of Loss

Shen Yuan was also busy with work these days, and most of the time, Shen Zhi was alone in the ward. When

people are alone, they tend to overthink. The more Shen Zhi thought about Feng Ran’s suspicious boss and college classmate, the more he felt something was wrong.

In the evening, Shen Yuan came, and when he got the chance, Shen Zhi asked: "Do you know anything about the situation between the two of them?"

"Who? What do you know?"

"Feng Ran," Shen Zhi said slowly, "and that guy named Chen."

"They, aren't they in the same company?"

"When did Feng Ran join?"

"A few months ago?... I don't know."

Shen Zhi looked at him, and suddenly his tone became serious: "What's going on with them?"

"They, aren't they..." Shen Yuan's eyes rolled, and Shen Zhi knew that this was a sign of nonsense, so he interrupted him harshly: "Tell the truth!"

"Oh, Shen Zhi!" Shen Yuan was very annoyed, and slapped his thigh, "You ask me, how should I know? They... anyway, they have a good relationship! As for whether they are together or not, I really don't know. It would be faster for you to wait for someone to come back and ask Chen Shuze!"

Shen Zhi said nothing more. Shen Yuan's apprehensive expression revealed everything.

He couldn't help but think of Ren He's words:

"I've never seen him be single for more than a month. Besides the serious relationships, there were also all sorts of relationships you couldn't imagine."

A sudden pain crept deep in his stomach, and he clenched his teeth, sweat pouring down.

He desperately wanted an answer, but, but, he didn't deserve it.

He imagined that if Feng Ran was really with Chen Shuze, and the two of them were still putting on this drama in front of him... he would have jumped out of the window

right then and there. After Shen Yuan left, he couldn't wait to call Feng Ran, but he didn't answer. A few minutes later, a message arrived.

"Busy, let's talk tonight"

couldn't quell his restless heart.

Obsessed, he kept doubting, speculating, analyzing, and reasoning. He nervously checked Chen Shuze's company and family, looked up their universities, searched the web for any information related to the two of them, secretly dug out Shen Yuan's old files, and searched for Chen Shuze in all the written records of Feng Ran.

He found nothing.

Feng Ran seemed to be really busy that day, and he didn't send him many messages the whole afternoon.

At dinner, Shen Zhi asked him what he had eaten, and a while later, Feng Ran sent him a picture.

Seven or eight people were sitting around a large round table, full of delicious food. It was a sneaky and candid photo.

"We need to drink some wine for a social event," he sent.

Shen Zhi was worried: "Can you drink less?"

"Don't worry about my alcohol tolerance. /Thumbs up/" Shen

Zhi's mind flashed with the scene of Chen Shuze being unable to hold his liquor, Feng Ran coming to the rescue, the two of them exchanging glances, and their tacit understanding was beyond words.

He sent messages non-stop.

Basically, they were all "Is the food delicious?" "I miss you", "When will it end?" "Are there any other activities tonight?" "How much did you drink?" and so on.

Feng Ran was also patient, not missing a word, not ignoring him at all. Shen Zhi enjoyed it very much.

At the dinner, Chen Shuze saw him checking his phone from time to time and whispered, "You're sending messages day and night, be careful of tenosynovitis."

Feng Ran said, "Thank you, Mr. Chen, for the reminder."

Chen Shuze reached under the table and slapped him, "Be careful, what did I say this afternoon? You have to get the guy across from you drunk."

"You're sick." Feng Ran glanced at the guy across from him, some vomiting, some drunk, and staggering. "That's enough. Are you really going to be carried back sideways?"

Chen Shuze spread his hands and said nothing.

Finally it was over, and when he returned to the hotel, the first thing he did was call Shen Zhi. He put his phone aside and went to bed.

"Feng Ran, I have something to ask you." Shen Zhi said the first thing.

"Okay." Feng Ran agreed, and suddenly there was a knock on the door, "Wait, someone's knocking. Who is it?" He slowly got out of bed and opened the door, "Chen Shuze? What's up?" Shen

Zhi frowned on the other end, but said nothing.

Chen Shuze said from the other end, "Let's go to the bar."

Feng Ran said, "You know I've been drinking all night."

Chen Shuze had been planning to go to the bar for a long time, and the glass in front of him was barely touched, because Feng Ran kept it from him.

"You can go to the bar without drinking," Chen Shuze said. "Besides, what you drank at dinner is not enough to fill your stomach."

"I'm not. Why are you going? Drink less alone."

"Okay, but not alone."

"So? Spring?"

Chen Shuze smiled. "Nothing. That guy contacted me the other day, and I went to give the handsome guy a bonus."

"You say it's nothing? I'm just like him, and Mr. Chen is completely captivated by him."

Chen Shuze glanced at him, his eyes shifting to the lit phone in his hand. "Where's the phone?"

"Yeah."

Chen Shuze smiled and left.

Feng Ran returned to bed and resumed the conversation. "What did you want to ask me?" Shen

Zhi listened to their conversation and felt a strange sense of relief. Subconsciously, Feng Ran wasn't the type to share her boyfriend.

He asked, "Who did Chen Shuze go drinking with?"

"A male model. We met at a bar."

"You went to a bar with him?"

"Yes," Feng Ran didn't deny. "We went for a while."

Although Chen Zhi was dissatisfied, he could only hold it in for now.

Feng Ran asked, "What exactly did you want to ask just now? Just before Chen Shuze knocked on the door."

"It doesn't matter," Shen Zhi continued. "What kind of bar did you go to? Was it a decent one, or a frivolous one?"

Feng Ran didn't answer for a moment.

Seeing this, Shen Zhi understood. He sighed, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked."

He couldn't tell whether it was pity or the reluctance of the sigh, but Feng Ran suddenly remembered how much Shen Zhi didn't want him to hang out in those places. They argued over this endlessly, and finally, he gave in and made a promise.

So much time had passed.

Shen Zhi was no longer the Chen Zhi who kept his word. He endured, endured everything.

Feng Ran felt an inexplicable pang of heartache. He wondered why he had to endure this injustice for himself? But think about it again, this is not the only injustice he has suffered.

But is he innocent? Until now, everything is his own fault.

He knows that the more he indulges Shen Zhi at this time, the more his bottom line will be compromised. But he still visits him and accompanies him every day, hoping that his face will turn red and his eyes will become lively, waiting for him to look up at him and call out "Feng Ran" with satisfaction.

He questioned Shen Yuan, asking why he should remain faithful to Shen Zhi, but Shen Zhi was really lying in front of him, and he still remained faithful to him.

He said hesitantly, as if he was talking about something shameful, "It doesn't matter. You can rest assured, I'm just going to drink, and I won't do anything else."

For several days, Feng Ran spent nothing but serving clients and Chen Shuze. Negotiations and drinking parties were all he had to do, and he was happy to have some free time. This business trip was going to be a bad one after all, and since he had the money and the time off, Chen Shuze had done him a favor.

While discussing the contract, Chen Shuze asked Feng Ran to go to the hotel to get a folder containing some paperwork. He was in such a hurry that he forgot to take it.

Feng Ran then left the office.

At three or four in the afternoon, the sun was still blazing, glaring brightly, and everything in sight was a mess. He rushed into a taxi like he was escaping from an oven, but just as he got back, he received another message from Chen Shuze urging him to hurry back.

After all this running, he was about to evaporate from the heat. The meeting wasn't over yet, so he escaped and guzzled two bottles of mineral water.

Then another message popped up on his phone. It was from the boy he'd added at the bar that day. He hadn't spoken to him since, and he had forgotten to delete it the next day.

He remembered it now, and just as he was about to delete it, he saw a picture of a USB flash drive in the message.

"Yours?" The message contained only two words.

Feng Ran focused his thoughts. He had indeed lost the USB drive a few days ago. Fortunately, there was nothing important inside. He had left it at a bar.

"Yes, where did you find it?" he asked.

"On the floor of the bar. Give me an address and I'll send it to you."

Feng Ran hesitated.

He was afraid that the USB drive was just a pretense, and the real intention was to meet him.

"Did you find it, or did you take it? Why did you only contact me today?" he asked.

The other party immediately replied, "I found it. I was busy a few days ago and just remembered it. I asked around and everyone said they didn't know. I had no choice but to open it and take a look. Besides work documents, there was also a resume. There was a 1-inch photo on it,

and then I remembered it was you." Then came another message: "Tell me the address quickly. I have something to do tonight. Remember to buy me a drink. It's so hot."

Seeing that he had no bad intentions and his tone was normal, and he didn't want to go on a date or anything like that, he thanked him and sent the address of a nearby coffee shop.

The place was not crowded. He ordered two iced drinks and chatted with Shen Zhi for a while. About twenty minutes later, someone pushed the door open.

Xiao Muzi. Feng Ran's fingers froze on the screen.

Xiao Muzi saw him, walked straight over and sat opposite him.

"It's you." Feng Ran said.

Xiao Muzi looked at him without blinking: "It's me. The one who found your USB drive is my friend. We are on vacation and came here to play."

Feng Ran wanted to laugh: "Did he find it or not?"

Xiao Muzi put the USB drive on the table and pushed it to him: "It doesn't matter."

"What's the matter?"

Xiao Muzi hesitated and said: "I heard that you broke up with Shen Zhi. Is it because of... me."

"No, it has nothing to do with you."

"You said you were single that day," Xiao Muzi looked at the table, "Why don't you fall in love again?"

"Busy with work."

"So busy?"

"Yeah." Feng Ran's phone rang, and he glanced at it. "Look, the boss's calling again."

Xiao Muzi said, "Then you go ahead. I'll wait for you."

Feng Ran walked to the door to answer the phone. Chen Shuze rambled on, "The meeting's over. I looked everywhere for you, but I couldn't find you. Where have you been? There's a box of local specialties—sea cucumbers, oysters, and so on—that can't be stored in this hot weather. I helped you load it onto the truck. We've all agreed to ship it all tomorrow. Remember to ask for them when you get back. I won't keep it for you. If you don't take it, I'll throw it away. Take it back and make a soup for your Shen Zhi."

He didn't know that Shen Zhi couldn't eat properly. In a month or two, he'd be stuck on simple vegetable soup and porridge.

Feng Ran nodded in agreement. After a few minutes, Xiao Muzi finished his lemonade.

He sat down and asked, "Any more?"

"No, thank you,"

Feng Ran said. "That's fine. I'll be leaving now."

Xiao Muzi finally looked up and said, "I'm sorry about what happened earlier." This was perhaps the first time he'd met Feng Ran's gaze that day.

Feng Ran knew what he was talking about and shook his head: "It's all in the past."

Xiao Muzi opened his mouth, but didn't know what to say, and lowered his eyes. He wanted Feng Ran to look at him, give him a chance, let him prove that he was no worse than his boyfriends.

He went to study painting and photography, and the teacher said that he had artistic talent. As long as he gave time, he might not be able to win the award that his ex-boyfriend won.

He was a little young, but he would grow up and mature. He wanted Feng Ran to wait for him and make room for him in his heart.

But every word was stuck in his throat and he couldn't say it.

It was Feng Ran who broke the silence: "How did you do later? Did you fail the course again? Did your further studies go smoothly?"

"No. It went very smoothly." He didn't like this topic, as if he was deliberately emphasizing the gap between them.

Feng Ran said like a teacher or a parent, "You should study hard and improve your GPA. It's best to pass all the exams you can, like the English Level 6 exam, the Computer Level 2 and Level 3 exams. The competition is very fierce now."

Xiao Muzi said, "I know. I passed them all."

"Great." Feng Ran gave me a thumbs up. "I have a sister who failed the Computer Level 3 exam twice. I told her she didn't study at all, and she argued with me."

Xiao Muzi said, "Oh, so you have a sister..."

"She's about your age."

Xiao Muzi finally understood.

Feng Ran stood up and said, "Okay, I should go."

"Is age that important? She's only five, not fifty."

Feng Ran said, "Yes and no." He turned around and said, "I may not be able to explain it to you clearly."

After waiting for a few seconds and hearing no response, he deleted the contact and walked out of the cafe. Until someone hugged him from behind, his cheek pressed against his shoulder, soaking a piece of fabric.

Xiao Muzi said sullenly, "Just let me die happily."

Feng Ran opened his mouth and said, "You will meet someone you like more, and he happens to like you too. To you, I am just a passer-by. It's not a matter of age, but when I met you, I already had someone else in my heart. I thought that by being with you, I could forget him. But I was wrong." "

It's Chen Zhi, right?"

"Yes. You are a little like him. Your eyes are always misty, your eyelashes are very long, and there is a very small mole in the corner of your left eye. I noticed it at first sight. That's why I agreed to go out and play with you." Feng Ran helped the trembling Xiao Muzi up from his body, "I'm so sorry. I didn't take it seriously at the beginning, and I didn't expect you to really like me. But who hasn't loved a bastard when they were young? Do you accept this reason?"

Xiao Muzi's wet, tearful eyes widened, revealing a painful expression: "You, how could you..."

Feng Ran turned a blind eye and smiled indifferently: "I like his eyes the most. But you are not him after all, do you understand?"

Xiao Muzi took a step back. He couldn't believe it. Was the man before him Feng Ran? The man he remembered, always warm and considerate, when had he ever said such hurtful words? Every word was like an icy blade, engraved on his heart.

"A fake is a fake." Feng Ran patted his cheek. "Understand, then get out of here."