"Get off the air! Get off the air immediately!"

The manager yelled hysterically, and the scene finally froze on the confused or terrified faces of the girl group members.

Xia Chi was also quite surprised.

He could think that the cat had been following Shi Lu for two years and should know something. This kind of guardian beast is the most loyal to its master. Just look at Zhao Ming's face and you will know that the cat fairy will not let Ling Fei go.

But I didn't expect that it would be so amazing when it did make a big splash.

[Holy crap, this cat has definitely practiced! The positioning and angles, it's like it's a real stunt, right?!]

[It is recommended to strictly check the educational background of this cat...]

Netizens joked in the barrage.

Five minutes later, the sound of sirens came from far away.

The relevant persons were taken to the police station for investigation.

Headlines that night:

#A top female group's live broadcast was found to be involved in drug use# (explosive)

#Dingsheng CEO Wan Chai was taken away by the police for investigation due to drug use# (explosive)

#The Four Evil Men of the Entertainment Circle: Wan Chai Falls, Netizens Applaud# (Hot)

#Team Meow Meow has done great work again! #

That afternoon, Jiang Nan did not return to the hotel. Instead, he went around to the back door without being noticed, put on a raincoat and a helmet, got on a shared bike, dodged the eagerly waiting fans and photographers with cameras, and headed west of the city.

Fu'anli in the west of the city is like a stubborn plaster, stuck to the waist of this glamorous city. The residential area that has been waiting for demolition for 20 years is crowded together, and the electric poles are crooked and stretched out with spider-web-like cables. In the distance, someone is playing old songs. Teresa Teng's sweet voice is loudly broadcasted by the cheap speakers, mixed with the sound of sesame paste.

The shared yellow bikes were hopping crazily on the cracked cement road. There were maze-like narrow alleys everywhere. Clotheslines were growing wildly on the windowsills on both sides, and underwear was fluttering in the wind.

Every few turns, a few stray dogs would be startled out.

[Why haven't you arrived yet? Hiss...isn't it right here?]

Xia Chi held the phone tightly, and the GPS here turned into a mess of gibberish.

[What the hell…]

He stole a glance in the rearview mirror at Jiang Nan's hair, which was messed up by the wind in the alley.

Bringing a celebrity to this kind of urban village...

[I still can’t find my way…]

[Jiang Nan had just experienced those bad things. Is he afraid? ]

[You don't think I'm going to sell him out, do you?]

Jiang Nan's eyes accidentally swept across the rearview mirror and happened to catch someone's sneak glance.

Someone turned away his eyes in panic, like a thief who had been caught doing something bad.

[Hmm! That was a close call…]

[He almost saw through it.]

He consoled himself with confidence.

[Humph! My identity today is the legitimate Taoist of Heavenly Secrets, helping others change their fates and overcome adversity. It was Jiang Nan who came to me on his own initiative!!!]

The wheels rolled over the gravel, the car body shook violently, and Xia Chi's thoughts drifted away -

[The white moonlight that comes to your doorstep...]

[If I don't eat this... am I still human? ]

Evil thoughts grow like weeds.

[How about... first this... then that...]

He imagined some indescribable scenes in his mind.

[If you dare to run, I'll break your legs and lock you up!]

What is this called?

[That’s right—eat them clean! Drain the marrow from their bones! Robbery!]

[You think... you can escape? Roar, roar, roar...]

[Every step you take... is in my cage...]

…

"Ahem."

Jiang Nan behind him suddenly seemed to be choked.

[This is terrible.]

Xia Chi had to retract his thoughts.

[Where is it exactly? ]

If we go around one more time, I'm afraid we'll end up in northern Myanmar.

"That stingy Cat Immortal ate all my dried fish and wouldn't even give me the road. Where is 186 Qingshiqiao Road? I bet he made it up."

Just as Xia Chi was hesitating whether to go through with the third turn, a yellowed piece of paper on the mottled wall caught his attention.

He braked and approached the moss-covered brick wall. Printed on the faded A4 paper were the following words:

Missing Cat

Name: None

Breed: Chinese rural cat

Color: Black

Characteristics: stuttering

This evil creature got lost in an alley two years ago. If you find it, please send it to No. 186 Qingshiqiao Road, Fu'anli.

A generous reward.

Below is a cat's profile picture, with a rebellious and world-weary face, just like a serial killer who has just been arrested.

(Warm Tip: This cat is extremely ferocious. Please do not feed it rashly if you find it, to avoid any accidents.)

"Ha! Found it."

Xia Chi carefully peeled off the notice, folded it in half several times and held it in his hand.

The shared yellow car started up again, and just as it turned the first fork in the road, it saw the "Kitchen God Temple" sign covered with small advertisements.

The car creaked to a stop in front of the mottled vermilion lacquer gate, and Xia Chi threw his backpack onto his shoulder.

Jiang Nan looked up at the crumbling plaque on the door lintel: "Kitchen God Temple?"

"The Kitchen God is enshrined in the Kitchen God Temple. He is the household god who protects the family from bad weather and is also the kitchen god who is in charge of the family's food." Xia Chi explained to him when he saw his puzzled look.

"Oh." Jiang Nan nodded: "God."

Xia Chi found a backer for himself.

"Although he's the God of Cooking, his reputation isn't as resounding as those others, but he's still a good god who has been carefully selected."

[The kind that doesn’t require you to shave your hair! ]

Xia Chi was worried sick about preserving Jiang Nan's beautiful hair.

"Don't underestimate the Kitchen God. He has the function of monitoring good and evil, saying good things in heaven and ensuring peace in the underworld. He is also good at punishing villains."

The two stood in front of the faded couplets. Xia Chi covered his lips with his hand and whispered, "The key is that this old man loves to meddle in other people's business."

Jiang Nan was a little confused, looking at the bleak scene around him. The walls were red brick walls from decades ago, and the paint on the doors was peeling.

“It’s quite depressing.”

"So he's the only one who has free time."

Xia Chi had just finished speaking when he stepped on a stone and almost sprained his foot.

There was a big rusty lock hanging in front of the door. Xia Chi fiddled with it for a long time and even posted a missing cat notice, but it was still no use.

"Strange," he muttered, stroking his chin. "The Immortal Sect never leaves any traces. If they can find it, how come..."

Before he finished speaking, he caught a glimpse of the stone slab embedded in the side of the door. The top panel was engraved with the words: Must read before entering the temple

Below is the "Kitchen God Temple Management Regulations."

Xia Chi read it again.

1. Do not be disrespectful to the gods

2. Please use civilized language

3. Please do not litter

4. Do not touch the statues and offerings at will

5. Please keep quiet and do not make loud noises

6. Please do not spit anywhere

7. It is strictly forbidden to steal tribute

8. Please do not take photos

9. Please put your incense money into the donation box (no QR code payment is accepted)

10. Please check your belongings before leaving the temple (we are not responsible for any loss after you leave)

Just after reading the last sentence, there was a "click" sound and the copper lock automatically popped open.

Jiang Nan and Xia Chi looked at each other.

It is really a must-read before entering the temple...

It’s even better than fingerprint unlocking.

You have come to the right place, a paradise on earth.

Open the door and walk in.

Several cat-shaped clay beasts are squatting on the green-tiled eaves. The plaque hanging on the lintel of the main hall has long been mottled, but the four ancient characters "燮理陰陽" can still be made out. Spider webs are woven on the corners, swaying gently in the wind.

There was a thick layer of dust on the altar, and only a few pieces of biscuits gnawed by mice remained in the empty offering plate. The ashes in the incense burner had formed into lumps.

In the center, the Kitchen God sits steadily. I don’t know which craftsman made such a brilliant move that he turned the kind-looking Kitchen God into a furious-eyed King Kong. It’s really chilling to look at.

Xia Chi pulled Jiang Nan and gestured to him with the backpack in his hand as they walked.

"I tell you, the Kitchen God is very narrow-minded. You must not come empty-handed, or he will be angry..." Before he could finish his words, he was suddenly tripped by something invisible.

"Ouch!"

Xia Chi knelt firmly on the ground, and the dull sound of his knees hitting the blue bricks was particularly crisp in the empty temple.

Jiang Nan hurried to help, but found that Xia Chi seemed to be nailed to the ground and did not move no matter how hard he pulled.

【……】

【Retribution in this life comes faster than takeout!】

Xia Chi opened his backpack with one hand, took out a bulging plastic bag from it, raised his hands above his head, and spoke in a loud voice.

"Kitchen God, I didn't buy any malt sugar today, so I brought you some dry yogurt, pickled pepper chicken feet, and Beijing-style soy milk. Please accept them."

The wind swirled, like a god humming reluctantly.

Xia Chi suddenly felt his body lighten, and he quickly climbed onto Jiang Nan's arm to stand up.

I cursed in my heart: "This old man is always vindictive."

Just as the thought occurred to him, the bricks on the ground suddenly came to life, tripping him hard and making him stumble. Xia Chi leaped forward with his arms and legs, but Jiang Nan grabbed him by the waist and stopped him from bowing.

[Damn it!] Xia Chi covered his mouth tightly.

[There's a God above us, and this old man can even read minds?!]

Xia Chi felt as if his spirit was lost, and the hairs on the back of his neck stood up.

The mist in the air wrapped around him as if it were real, giving him the inexplicable illusion that he was being watched by countless pairs of eyes, as if even his shadow no longer belonged to him.

I remember the first sentence on the entrance door was "Please do not disrespect the gods."

My whole body started to itch.

He raised his eyebrows and raised his middle finger in his sleeve.

“Ouch!”

His knees softened and he knelt firmly on the blue brick floor, knocking his forehead with a crisp "dong dong" sound. The whole process was smooth, as if an invisible hand was pressing on the back of his neck to complete this kowtow.

Jiang Nan tried to help him again, but Xia Chi was as heavy as a sack, and no matter how hard he pulled, he wouldn't budge. It wasn't until a red mark appeared on his forehead that the invisible force suddenly disappeared.

"Be careful with what you say and do... Be careful with what you say and do..."

Xia Chi staggered to his feet, his eyes wide open, and only these four words remained in his mouth over and over again. He was completely defeated.

As the saying goes, "Don't hit someone who smiles." Xia Chi, with a shy smile on his face, carrying a bulging plastic bag, quickly entered the main hall. He first burned incense, then lit candles, and finally, with his hands and feet, he swiftly pulled a bunch of snacks from the bag and arranged them in a dazzling array on the altar. "Look, Kitchen God! This is some top-notch Erguotou, brought especially for you!"

Before he finished speaking, a gust of wind swept through the hall, making the snack bags on the altar rustle. Xia Chi immediately understood, nodded, and twisted the lid of the yogurt. "Okay, try this Western Region Dry Choking Yogurt. I guarantee it'll make you even more choked up than maltose!"

Strangely enough, as soon as the yogurt lid was opened, the wind suddenly died down and silence returned to the hall.

Xia Chi let out a long sigh, then knelt on the mat and unfolded the "Missing Cat Notice" in his pocket.

"Kitchen God, the notice said your cat was lost, and I've found it for you."

He took out a golden nameplate from his pocket with the word "stove" written on it.

The atmosphere in the Kitchen God Temple is a bit cold.

"Don't worry, Your Highness. Your guardian beast didn't run away, nor did it get lost. Instead, it was severely injured in the battle with the barefoot ghost. Its meridians were severed, and it was nearly dead. So, someone picked it up..."

As Xia Chi was speaking, he suddenly became speechless, not knowing what he heard, and waved his hands in front of his chest like windshield wipers.

[No, no, no, it’s not like that…]

[No imprisonment and torture... No torture... No plundering... No no no, no plundering...]

[No, no, no, neither of them...]

[Ouch! Kitchen God, please watch less short videos!]