Sometimes what tortures people is not separation from loved ones, but the disappointment that accumulates over time.
Chen Jinmo was dumped by Lin Jingxiang, who chose to start a relationship with other men. Chen Jinmo had an affair with Guan Qianqian and was also involved with Yu Xinna.
When Shen Xingmo came into my world, I chose to stay away from Shen Xingmo and watched Chen Jinmo's romantic life coldly, burying the pain in my heart.
These are all our choices.
For every ordinary person, all choices are not worthy of sympathy.
When I received my first month's salary, I gritted my teeth and spent most of it to buy Qin Fangrui a ladies' watch. She had said on TV that she liked this brand. Her birthday is only half a month away, so I will give it to her then.
On the way back to school, I met a family of three: a woman in her thirties holding a child about three years old and a middle-aged man carrying a women's bag.
There were many people and cars on the road, and I was concentrating on walking and didn't notice that they stopped me.
"Kind person, can you buy something for the child to eat? We took a taxi and left our wallet in the car." The woman looked at me with pitiful eyes.
I asked a few simple questions: Do you have a cell phone? Where are you coming from? They said they came from Henan, they have a cell phone, and they called a friend in Yunnan, but the friend can only come tomorrow.
"I won't buy anything. Use the money to buy food for the child." I felt sorry for the child, so without thinking too much, I took out two hundred yuan from my wallet and gave it to the middle-aged man.
The middle-aged man asked me to leave my phone number so that he could return the money the next day. I said no and turned to leave. The middle-aged man stopped me and asked me again and again to leave my phone number, so I had to give him my number.
"Did you dial it?" the woman asked me as the man entered the number. She didn't feel the phone vibrate in her pocket, so it must have not been connected.
"It's okay, it's okay." I wanted to leave, but the woman refused to give up. She followed me in small steps and pleaded with me pitifully, "Girl, can you lend us a few hundred dollars for accommodation? I'll pay you back tomorrow when our friends come over."
"I can only help you up to this point." I refused awkwardly. The woman continued to say nice things, but I remained firm in my attitude and didn't care what she said. I just left without looking back.
I thought about it and felt something was wrong: Why didn't their Mandarin have any Henan accent? There were classmates from Henan in the class, and they spoke with a strong accent, and their friends drove here from Yunnan? How could they, who were from far away Henan, have friends from Yunnan? There were so many doubts, and the satisfaction in my heart was immediately replaced by a sense of loss.
God, I feel cheated!
I walked back to the intersection, but they were gone. I consoled myself: They couldn't possibly be cheating people with their children. If the middle-aged man calls me tomorrow, it means they are not scammers.
I waited from morning till night, and the whole day was almost over, but I never received a call from the middle-aged man...
"What's with that expression on your face?" Xu Xiaoran came over and pinched my face, yawning.
Tian Ye was browsing Weibo on his tablet. He glanced at us and interrupted, "Maybe you were scammed by a liar."
"You have a bad mouth." Xu Xiaoran glared at her.
Guan Qianqian sat on the bed in silence, reading "Dream of the Red Chamber ". On the table, in her vase, there was a bunch of bright red roses.
I have to admire Chen Jinmo's abilities.
I told Xu Xiaoran what happened yesterday, and Xu Xiaoran looked at me as if I were mentally retarded. Tian Ye held out her tablet in front of us and said, "Look, I didn't lie to you. What Lin Jingyuan said was the same as this contributor. I'm not surprised by such things."
"You are just too honest, stupid." Xu Xiaoran looked at me angrily and anxiously, and asked anxiously, "There are only two hundred yuan, nothing else, right?"
"No." After all, I was stupid and didn't explain anything. As I said, none of my choices deserve sympathy. I don't use my brain when encountering things, so why shouldn't others cheat me?
"Fools have good fortune. Just do a good deed today." Xu Xiaoran comforted me, scratched her hair irritably, climbed onto the bed and video chatted with Yao Ruhua.
Although it is good to be together, it is sad to be apart. The world is interesting. Maybe the two hundred dollars does not belong to me, so I will just let it go.
I don’t know why I suddenly felt sad.
Time passed and it was Qin Fangrui's birthday. That weekend, I did not go to the Internet cafe to work. I said goodbye to my boss and went home.
This is the first time I've gone home since school started.
The edges of the ginkgo trees have turned yellow, and the leaves will soon turn golden yellow. If there is no strong wind, the golden color will continue until mid-to-early November.
There are no tung flowers in the Tonghua Community. When the northwest wind blows, the leaves begin to fall one after another, and the ground is golden, which is very beautiful.
I walked downstairs and saw a white car parked in front of the house.
Who is coming?
Lin Dongming changed his car?
When I opened the door, the living room was tidy for the first time. There was a bouquet of lilies and a cake on the table. Lin Jingxiang was lying on the sofa watching TV. Next to her sat a boy who looked like a cartoon character, massaging her calves.
Qin Fangrui was wearing an apron and humming an unknown tune in a good mood. She put one hand on her waist and cooked with a spatula in the other.
"I'm back." I changed my shoes in the entrance and shouted to the kitchen.
"Wash your hands and eat." Qin Fangrui was no longer mean to me when she was happy. She was like an oriole, singing a song, bringing a plate of food to the table with light steps, and then turned around and flew back to the kitchen.
Lin Jingxiang had her hair cut short, but nothing else had changed. When the boy saw me coming in, he asked Lin Jingxiang to sit up, but she ignored him. He nodded and smiled at me, "I've heard of you for a long time. Hello, Jingyuan. I'm Versace."
The most handsome boy on campus at University A is also a rich young man, so cool.
This was Chen Jinmo's evaluation of him. I saw that he was wearing a casual suit and spoke humbly. He was not as cynical as Chen Jinmo said. Maybe Chen Jinmo was jealous.
"Have some tea." I saw that he had been at home for such a long time, but Qin Fangrui hadn't poured out the tea. When Lin Jingxiang saw me bringing the cup, he glanced at it, raised two fingers, and told me, "Boiled water."
"Jingxiang." Versace gave her a reproachful look. My outstretched hand stopped in mid-air, then I retracted it and poured them two glasses of boiled water.
"I just asked you, didn't you say you didn't want to drink?" Versace tested the water temperature and handed the cup to Lin Jingxiang. Lin Jingxiang enjoyed his free service like Karl Lagerfeld.
"I drank what Lin Jingyuan poured." Lin Jingxiang looked at him with a smile.
I'm too lazy to argue with Lin Jingxiang, who deserves a beating.
It’s almost time for dinner, and Qin Fangrui has prepared a table full of dishes that are as sumptuous as the New Year’s Eve dinner. I never knew that Qin Fangrui’s cooking skills were so good.
"For you." Seeing Qin Fangrui taking off her apron, I handed her a box. She picked it up, looked at it, and frowned.
"Why don't you discuss this with me?" she asked casually, "Where did you get so much money?"
"I earned it." A little pride rose in my heart.
Qin Fangrui turned around and took out an identical box from the top of the refrigerator, and said, "Look, you bought too much? I don't need so many. Do you think that if you wear two watches, God will give me twice as much time and I won't die?"
"You're such a stubborn person. You're already in college, but you don't think about anything at all." Qin Fangrui accepted the gift while mumbling, and casually put it in the drawer under the table.
My heart felt like a cigarette butt had burned a hole in it. I moved my lips. There were guests around, and I didn't want to argue with her. Qin Fangrui had the habit of speaking without paying attention to the occasion, and she couldn't change it.
Versace quietly poured us drinks and set the table for us. He was not offended by Qin Fangrui's vulgar words, nor did he interfere in our family affairs.
This home is disturbing.
Not long after dinner that day, Qin Fangrui put the watch I gave her up for sale on Xianyu.com. She said it would be better to get some money to spend.
When she told me this, I was at work. The Internet cafe was filled with the smell of betel nuts and cigarettes, which stung my eyes. I felt uncomfortable staying in there, so I hung up the phone, said hello to a colleague, and went to the back of the cafe to get some fresh air.
Behind the Internet cafe is a courtyard where Uncle Shi usually lives. He raises a few chickens in the yard and there are several pots of chrysanthemums placed against the wall. The flowers are red and the leaves are green, and they are blooming beautifully.
Suddenly, Uncle Shi’s heroic laughter came into my ears. Behind the trees and flowers, I saw a young man in the pavilion with his back to me, playing chess with Uncle Shi.
"Uncle, your skills are still so good." The boy said with a smile.
"Axing, you haven't come to see me for a long time." Uncle Shi took a sip of wine, looked up and laughed.
"I didn't come here today."
"Uncle doesn't know you yet. Last time you asked me to recruit someone, I think you came to see me for real, but you came to see that girl Lin for real, right?"
Shen Xingmo smiled but said nothing.
Ruohua has an uncle who runs an Internet cafe, just outside our school. I asked him to ask for me yesterday, and his uncle said he was hiring. You are our friend, so please ask his uncle to look after you.
I remembered Xu Xiaoran’s words, and it seemed that everything was explained.
There are not so many coincidences. It’s just that someone is protecting you from the wind and rain and not letting you know.
"Hey, come here, girl."
Uncle Shi picked up his wine glass, looked up and saw me standing under the eaves, and waved at me quickly. Shen Xingmo tilted his head, looked over, and the corners of his mouth curled up.
"I'm going to go have a drink with someone." Uncle Shi stretched himself pretentiously, picked up his bottle and glass, looked us over, and smiled as he walked, "Young people nowadays are really good."
As soon as Uncle Shi left, the air became cold.
I walked down a few steps, crossed the yard, and came in front of Shen Xingmo. The wind blew gently towards me. He put the chess pieces into the chess box, looked up and smiled at me.
He is always so gentle, making me feel so cold and annoying that I don’t deserve so much care from him.
"If Xiaoran and Huazai hadn't kept it a secret from you, you wouldn't have agreed to come." He seemed to know what I would ask, and he took the blame first. He was the one who helped me, so why should he apologize?
"If you skip work, can you talk to Uncle Shi and ask him not to deduct my money?" I turned my eyes away from his face and looked at his hands. Once upon a time, I got angry and pushed him to the ground because Yu Xinna bullied me.
That wound must have scabbed over long ago.
"Huh? What do you mean?" My question was so sudden that he didn't realize what I meant and looked at me puzzled.
"I'll treat you to milk tea, will you give me some face?" I grinned at him.
A heart made of stone should be warmed up. People should know how to be grateful. If someone helps me again and again, why not thank him once?
Later, I always remembered his expression at that time, joy mixed with caution, and he said "OK" twice in a row. Later, I found out that Shen Xingmo didn't like milk tea.
He said, I just wanted to meet you.
It turns out that the first encounter at the "Thousand Islands Time" milk tea shop was also a planned "conspiracy".
Since when will I, Lin Jingyuan, be cared for and cherished like this, and be placed at the top of someone's heart, allowing a warm flower to bloom?
It turned out that he had already woven a spider web of fate, waiting for me to fall into the trap.
People with stubborn tempers also have fierce stomachs. In the evening, when Shen Xingmo and I were taking a scenic walk along the river, my stomach growled a few times.
"I'm not hungry, not at all." I put my hand on my stomach, looked at my belly, and argued without confidence.
Without thinking, Shen Xingmo took me to a Cantonese restaurant. I couldn't stop her even if I called her. Facing a table of light but appetizing dishes, Shen Xingmo started eating.
"If you don't start eating, I won't keep any more." He picked up the chopsticks and shook his head.
"Oh." I was very sensible and did not let him down. I ate up all the dishes on the table diligently. Shen Xingmo looked at me in shock, and I burped with fear.
Maybe it's a habit I developed from being scolded by Qin Fangrui when I was a child, I never waste food. I would rather burst my stomach than waste it.
Now, Shen Xingmo must think that I am a big eater.
I started hiccuping and couldn't stop even after I went out the door. Shen Xingmo asked me to wait there for a while and bought me a bottle of water and a box of digestive tablets. After I took them, it took me a while to return to normal.
It seems like he always sees the worst side of us.
Under the street lights, our shadows moved slowly forward on the sidewalk, one after the other. I followed Shen Xingmo, silently counting the brick grids under my feet.
"I'm studying for a double degree." After walking for a while, he suddenly spoke.
"Oh, that's good." I asked casually, "What's the test?"
"medicine."
I stopped and looked at him.
"A Yuan, do you know my dream?" Shen Xingmo put his hands in his pockets, watching the transport ships rumble past on the river, his eyes narrowed slightly, "It is to cure you."
My heart was trembling a little. I raised my head and looked at the person in front of me, my eyes were wet .
Heal me...
Someone wants to heal my left ear, and the whispers my left ear heard went into my heart.
That night, I returned to the dormitory and Guan Qianqian brought back another bouquet of red roses. The dried petals were thrown into the trash can. Those petals were just like my wrinkled heart, and no one cared about them.
"Guan Qianqian, is someone pursuing you?" Tian Ye was brave and she was the only one who talked to Guan Qianqian.
Guan Qianqian put the flowers in the vase, grabbed her black hair with both hands, tied it into a loose bun, picked a rose, pinned it on top, and nodded.
Chen Jinmo also helped her do this action.
I can't help but sigh that if a person is good-looking, he or she will have a different look no matter how he or she dresses up. With her hair loose, Guan Qianqian looks like a beautiful and mysterious witch, and with her hair tied up, she looks like a beautiful lady from ancient times .
No wonder Chen Jinmo is so fascinated by her.
"Who is it? After the 'shrew incident', is there anyone who is not afraid of death?" Tian Ye looked at her and smiled. She was talking about the old incident where Guan Qianqian poured water on her suitor downstairs from the upstairs floor.
"Chen Jinmo." Guan Qianqian stroked the water droplets on the petals and looked at me intentionally or unintentionally.
"Mr. Chen is well-known for his philanthropy, so it's not surprising that he pursues her." Xu Xiaoran was applying nail polish, blew on her hands, and said sarcastically.
"Good job, Xu Xiaoran. I like to see you arguing with people." Tian Ye was immediately amused by Xu Xiaoran's sarcasm and laughed out loud.
"You're killing me, trying to sow discord." Xu Xiaoran was unhappy. Tian Ye's heart tightened and she immediately stopped talking. She turned on her computer and shook her head in grief, "Women..."
"You sound like you're not a woman." Xu Xiaoran said with a cold face. She raised her index finger and picked up her phone to play Candy Crush.
This time I couldn't laugh anymore, Guan Qianqian's hostile gaze once again clearly lingered on my face.
It was an inquiring look, like a thorn, which made people feel uncomfortable.
In the middle of the night, I got up to go to the bathroom and suddenly saw a dark shadow standing outside the balcony. I was about to shout, but I found that there was no one in Guan Qianqian's bunk, so I shut my mouth.
Then, Guan Qianqian opened the sliding door, walked back to her bed, lay down, and breathed very shallowly and evenly.
Guan Qianqian was sleepwalking.
I lay back, wrapped myself tightly in the quilt, turned my head gently, and looked at Guan Qianqian who was curled up in a ball. She was talking in her sleep. Her voice was very soft and I couldn't hear it clearly, but her tone was very panicked, as if she had had a nightmare.
After this incident, I dare not mess with Guan Qianqian anymore.
If she had a grudge against me and came to strangle me in the middle of the night while sleepwalking, I would be scared to death.