Chapter 5: Staying for spiritual practice and forgetting to return 4. Entrustment
As Liu Cang said, Zhang Zhan did not dare to take over the hot potato of the Grand Tutor. Liu Xiu's tough measures in recent years have made everyone in the court see the determination and means of the emperor's autocracy. Zhang Zhan did not dare to disobey the imperial order, so he pretended to be crazy and stupid, openly urinating and defecating in the court, saying that he was in poor health and terminally ill and could not be competent for such an important responsibility as the Three Dukes. As a result, the matter of appointing Zhang Zhan as the Grand Tutor was eventually abandoned.
Of course, the film clerk also revealed to me other news. Privately, Zhang Zhan, for the sake of face, still boasted to these close friends that he was unwilling to accept my favor and that his heart was still loyal to his old master Guo Shengtong.
I naturally would not take such words of no practical use to heart. In fact, more public opinion believed that the emperor was a man of affection and righteousness, as he could appoint the deposed empress's subordinates without holding grudges when he was critically ill. This also showed that the emperor was benevolent and the empress was virtuous, and even if he was a subordinate of the deposed empress Guo and the deposed crown prince, he was willing to use them according to their talents.
By the beginning of June, Liu Xiu had been in a coma for two days and three nights. He was seriously ill and could only survive by taking rice milk soup every day. The imperial physician reported that Liu Xiu's condition had changed from dizziness to jaundice. The heat and toxins accumulated in his body, causing his eyes to turn yellow. Slowly, his skin would also turn yellow. By then, even gods would be powerless to save him.
I watched over him day and night, and had already prepared for the worst in my heart, so I entrusted the affairs of the previous dynasty to the Crown Prince. Since there was no support , I asked Liu Zhuang to consult his uncles if he had any questions.
On the sixth day of the sixth lunar month, the east gradually brightened. When the sand in the clepsydra was about to run out, Liu Xiu, who had been in a coma for many days, groaned. Guangde Hall was extremely quiet. I knelt on the bed and looked at him peacefully and calmly.
"Are you awake?" I whispered in his ear, "Did a mosquito bite you?"
My fingers touched his cheek, which was a little hot. I helped him up while chuckling and gently moved his head to my thigh: "Xiu'er, the sun will rise soon. I really want you to accompany me to Mangshan to watch the sunrise!"
The pair of copper phoenix lamps at the head of the bed emitted a weak light, and the light shone on Liu Xiu's face, which was surprisingly sallow. His eyelids were closed, covered by long eyelashes. Apart from the vague discernible movement of his eyeballs under his closed eyelids, his breathing could not be heard. The hall was still very quiet, and the air was mixed with the heat of the morning sun. After a long time, his chest vibrated and a muffled cough came out.
I took out the comb I had prepared from my bosom and whispered, "Can I comb your hair for you? You've been sleeping for so many days, your hair is all messy."
He didn't say anything, and I silently untied his bun. His long hair suddenly fell down, and the hair was very long and sparse , with more white than black. I held a lock of long hair, bit my lips tightly, and combed the hair carefully with a comb.
"Does it hurt? You always laugh at me for being clumsy, and it's true... I can't even comb the pigtails of my children properly. Prince Yi often says that it's better to pull out their hair than to let me comb it... Don't worry, I'll comb it gently... I won't dare to use too much force. Look at you, you have so little hair, how can... you withstand my pulling..." I said to myself here, and suddenly choked up. I sniffed and forced a smile, "Does it hurt? If it hurts, you must make a sound, otherwise I will not be responsible if all your hair is pulled out..."
He coughed again, and his body shook violently. I hurriedly said, "I know, I know, I won't pull it, I won't pull it... At most I'll pull it all off, and I'll be responsible..." I paused, and tears suddenly rolled down, "I will be responsible for you, for the rest of my life... I will be responsible for combing your hair for the rest of your life, are you satisfied with this?"
His forehead was burning hot, and I could no longer tell whether it was his body temperature or mine. I forced myself to put his hair into a bun and asked, "What kind of crown would you like to wear today? In fact, I still like to see you wearing a turban... I'm telling you, I've always remembered it, that year you were wearing a short coat and hemp shoes, standing in the fields, smiling so contentedly... Oh, don't laugh at me, do you hear me, don't laugh..."
He remained silent, his eyelids remained tightly closed, and in the empty hall, only the sound of my mumbling could be heard faintly.
I leaned down and gently kissed him on the forehead, then looked up at his face. His expression was very peaceful, his breathing was sometimes fast and sometimes slow. The sky gradually brightened, and the light came in from the window. He and I were bathed in the bright sunshine, and countless dust particles seemed to be swirling around us.
"You fell asleep again. Why are you so sleepy? You said that this year is my birthday and you wanted to celebrate my birthday! How can you cheat me?" I sighed softly and whispered dotingly, "You look like a child when you are asleep." I stroked his cheek, my fingers sliding over the familiar facial features. I looked at him greedily, then leaned over and kissed his pale lips hard, sucking deeply.
Tears flowed down the bridge of my nose and finally into my mouth. What I tasted with the tip of my tongue was a resolute heartache.
As the day dawned, the imperial doctors came in one after another to see the emperor. As usual, Fang Cheng took the prescription and gave it to Yao Cheng to supervise the imperial doctors to boil the medicine, and then gave the boiled medicine to Dai Ang. According to the rules, the eunuchs, who were the emperor's close attendants, would taste the medicine first before feeding it to the emperor. I skipped this step directly. Whether it was tasting the medicine or feeding the medicine, I did it myself. I didn't want to let others do it.
Liu Xiu is racing against life, and I am racing against him. No matter where he plans to run, I have decided to stay with him forever, fight side by side, and never separate.
From sunrise to sunset, Liu Xiu slept for thirteen hours again. The next morning, I was so tired that I curled up on the side of the bed to rest. Suddenly, I felt someone staring at me. I jumped out of my drowsiness. I barely opened my eyelids and heard a hoarse voice laughing: "This time the mosquito will bite you!"
I blinked and stared with empty eyes. It took me a long time to focus and see the figure in front of me clearly.
"Xiu'er!"
He lay flat on the bed, with a strange blush on his cheekbones, his eyeliner narrowed into a slit, and his smile was very heartbreaking.
"Are you okay?" I was surprised and happy. Liu Xiu was in good spirits. If you didn't look carefully, you wouldn't be able to tell that he was a seriously ill patient.
The corners of his mouth curved into a beautiful arc, his smile was still so charming, I was so happy that I almost jumped up. But he suddenly held my hand, squeezed it gently, and whispered: "Do something for me."
I was stunned, and I felt that his tone was unusual.
"Call the Crown Prince and Yin Xing here. I... have something to say..."
In an instant, it was as if someone poured a basin of ice water over my head, and my heart froze into thick ice. I looked at him in a trance, and his eyes slowly turned into a sharp pain. The reluctance and helplessness were like many tangled thorns, tightly strangling me, making me unable to breathe.
Shanan was standing guard outside the door, and she quickly informed the Grand Chamberlain, who sent people to summon the Crown Prince and the Palace Attendant Yin Xing. Liu Zhuang was guarding the side hall of the Yuntai, so he came very quickly after hearing the news.
Liu Xiu tried his best to stay awake. When Yin Xing rushed to Guangde Hall from outside the palace, panting, half an hour had passed. During this half an hour, Liu Xiu only said two or three words to Liu Zhuang. He seemed to have been waiting... maintaining his remaining strength, waiting...
During this period, I couldn't tell whether I was sad or grief-stricken. My heart was so numb that I couldn't feel anything. Liu Xiu held my hand tightly, so that I no longer felt afraid and my emotions gradually calmed down.
"Jun Ling..." Liu Xiu stretched out his hand. In just over half a month, his wrist had become thinner and his wrist bones were ridged. He pointed at Liu Zhuang, who was kneeling beside the bed, with a trembling hand. "This child is gifted and intelligent, and has a kind nature... I am not worried that he will not be a good emperor in the future, but he is still young and occasionally he will inevitably be a little bit temperamental. Being the emperor's son may make according to your own temperament. You must not follow your temper. You should care about the world and think more about the people of the country... You are his uncle and have watched him grow up since he was a child. You know his nature best, and I know you best, so... so... I will entrust him to you today!"
Yin Xing had been gloomy since he entered the hall. When Liu Xiu finished speaking with a strong breath, his expression had changed several times. Liu Xiu asked Dai Ang to write down what he had just said, and then he took a deep breath. I stuffed a soft pillow under his neck, let him lean his weight on me, and I supported him from behind.
Liu Zhuang's sobbing gradually sounded. At this time, he was more like a helpless child. Although he had been outstanding and intelligent since he was young, he was only a teenager of seventeen years old. In the eyes of parents, children are always just children, and they will always worry about them.
Yin Xing kowtowed, "Your Majesty! Forgive me... Forgive me for not obeying your command. I have no talent or virtue, how can I assist His Royal Highness the Crown Prince? Your Majesty has not given me a relative by marriage and entrusted me with important tasks. I am deeply grateful. In this case, why don't you entrust the Crown Prince to the care of the Empress?"
I smiled and answered before Liu Xiu could: "I can't take care of the prince!"
I said it calmly. When Yin Xing was stunned, Liu Zhuang had already knelt down in front of the bed and burst into tears. Yin Xing and I looked at each other, and I nodded to him without avoiding him: "Yang'er will be in your care from now on. I believe that you and your elder brother will not disappoint His Majesty and me!"
"Empress...Empress!"
My hands fumbled around my waist for a while, and finally I took off the evil-repelling pendant tied around my waist and handed it to Yin Xing: "This... returns it to its original owner! I hope... it will protect my child and bless the Han Dynasty!"
"Queen——" Yin Xing screamed tremblingly.
I smiled and looked calm, "Brother, please take your nephew out. His Majesty and I... have some private conversations to discuss."
Yin Xing took the evil-repelling order with trembling hands, clenched his fists, and knelt down in grief. Liu Zhuang cried until his voice was hoarse, and was reluctant to leave. He just called out "Father Emperor" and "Mother Empress", each and every cry was heartbreaking and heartbreaking.
I couldn't bear to watch any more, so I turned my head away and waved my hand, signaling Yin Xing to drag him out quickly. The Grand Chamberlain and the eunuch Dai Ang were all very smart, and they immediately cooperated tacitly to clear all the idle people in the hall, but they didn't dare to go far, so they crowded in the outer room of the bedroom waiting for any action.
I know what they are thinking , but I don't care. After all that just now, Liu Xiu seemed tired. He lay in my arms with his eyes closed.
I hugged him gently, put my lips next to his ear, and whispered: "Xiu'er, it's so hot, you keep sleeping like this, and you don't even bother to take a shower, well... you smell..." I chuckled, "But don't worry, I won't dislike you! I'm good, okay? If you are willing to kiss me, I will scratch your back!"
He didn't respond. I twitched my lips and sneered, "I'm telling you, marrying me in this life is your greatest blessing! You have to know how to cherish your blessings and remember to always be good to me, okay?" I reached into his collar and scratched his back skillfully. He was very thin and didn't have much meat on his back. I didn't dare to scratch too hard, but just gently scratched up and down, asking as I did, just like chatting with him on weekdays, "Do you feel comfortable? If you feel comfortable, remember to say it. I'm telling you, let's follow the old rules. No matter how long I scratch you, you have to double the time... well, you have to give me a leg massage..."
Tears fell down my cheeks, but I didn't cry out loud. While crying, I continued to talk to him with a smile: "I'm such a good person, how could you leave me? You are not young anymore, what would you do without me? What if you can't find something? Who will chat with you? Who will tickle you? So, how could you leave me? You have to take me with you wherever you go, right? I know you best... You can't bear to leave me... just like I can't bear to leave you, the two of us... how can we be separated? How can we... be separated..."
The sun was shining outside the palace, and my shadow and Liu Xiu's shadow overlapped, dragging out a long shadow. The shadow moved from the left side of the room to the right side little by little. I sat stiffly on the bed, holding the man I loved most in my arms, talking to him non-stop, as if he was talking to me too.
