Chapter 4: What is better than a clear conscience? 1
In our eyes, other people's stories are vehicles moving smoothly forward, while our stories are tangled threads. I don't want to deceive anyone, but I have to deceive. So, what reason do I have to pray for forgiveness that does not belong to me?
——Sunai
I stood alone in the middle of the hall, looking at the staff around me. You see, our own sadness is just an unnecessary drama in the eyes of others.
I crossed my arms and let out a long breath.
Suddenly, I felt a warm sensation on my shoulder. I lowered my eyes and saw He Yue approaching me. He took off his coat and put it on my shoulders. He gently placed his left hand on my shoulder and walked with me outside.
He Yue opened the car door for me and I got in. He turned on the heater, and I took off my clothes and covered myself with them, leaning back in the seat without saying a word.
The car door was closed, but He Yue did not drive the car.
My mind was filled with Xiao Anning's words. I wondered, was I wrong? Was Sunai wrong? Was it because we had never felt the same way that we were unable to sympathize with her?
"Let me take you out to relax." He Yue sat in the driver's seat and turned to look at me.
"I want to go to the beach." I buried my head, and tears fell one by one on He Yue's clothes.
He Yue turned sideways, put his arm around me, pulled the seat belt from my right side and fastened it, and asked, "Do you always forget to fasten your seat belt?"
I looked at the seatbelt fastened to my body and replied muffledly, “I’m sorry.”
"Don't use the word 'sorry' in the wrong place." He Yue said, holding the steering wheel, turning the car around and driving towards the beach.
I curled up in the car, with a thousand thoughts in my mind.
The car stopped at the beach, and I wanted to get out, but He Yue refused to open the door. He opened the roof and said, "It's cold at the beach, just sit in the car and enjoy the sea breeze."
I didn't refute, still leaning against the car window, without saying anything.
He Yue didn't say anything either, just sat beside me quietly.
The sea water and the night sky merge into one at midnight, like the mouth of a beast, which can swallow people in an instant. Our happiness comes from here, and our sadness also comes from here; love begins here and ends here.
At the beginning, Sunai told me that if I wrote down the unhappy things on the beach and let the tide wash them away, I would not be unhappy in the future. But there are so many unknown things in life. I can write down the past on the beach and let the tide wash it away, but I can’t write down the future.
My neck felt a little sore, so I rubbed it and said to He Yue intermittently, "I...Su Nai and I were worried that Xiao Anning would be bullied in the dance bar. We wanted her to leave, but Xiao Anning's family situation required a lot of money, so she didn't want to leave, and we had a quarrel over this."
"Are you asking me whether you did the right thing?" He Yue said bluntly.
"I think Sunai and I are not wrong, but Xiao Anning is not wrong either." I lowered my head and thought carefully, frowning.
He Yue said: "You have the answer in your heart, why are you asking me? Xiao Anning is an adult, she is responsible for her own actions. Whatever happens to her in the dance bar is her own responsibility, and it has nothing to do with you. If you are just worried about her safety, a different approach might work better."
"What method?" I asked puzzledly.
He Yue looked at the sea in the distance and said, "For example, when she gets off work, you can go pick her up with Sunai. As long as you make sure she gets off work on time and isn't taken away by the customers, she'll be safe."
"But if she continues to work in the dance bar, someone with ulterior motives will see her and spread the news. You know how terrible rumors are. They will affect Xiao Anning's reputation." I analyzed with a frown.
He Yue suddenly smiled, looked at me, and asked, "Is there anything better than having a clear conscience?"
I stared at He Yue blankly, never thinking about this question.
No matter how many rumors there are, can they compare to a clear conscience? As long as you don't do those things, why should you care about what others think?
I unbuckled my seat belt, leaned sideways on the seat, stared at He Yue and asked, "Senior, are you happy?"
"I was very happy before I met you." He Yue rubbed his nose nonchalantly.
I smiled and said, "What you say always makes me suddenly enlightened. In fact, I understand a lot of things myself, but I just can't do it. I really envy you. When you are not working every day, you just read books at home and it seems that you have no worries at all."
"You don't show your troubles to others, you have to solve them yourself." He Yue tilted his head, fixed his eyes on me, and said, "Also, true friends can understand and tolerate each other, and will not separate no matter how badly they quarrel."
"I won't separate from them." I said, gently scratching He Yue's seat with my fingers.
The wind blowing from the seaside was a little chilly. I curled up and said sullenly, "Senior, there's one more thing I'd like to ask you for help with. It's about the man who just stopped us, named Mr. Liu. He should be a regular customer of Jingong KTV. Can you help me find out who he is?" As I was talking, I felt a little sleepy.
"Okay, I will. You lean back and rest for a while." He Yue looked at my tired appearance and said softly.
"Well, don't close the roof." I said in a daze, and I couldn't open my eyes.
I don’t know why, but I feel at ease in front of He Yue.
Soon, I fell asleep. In a half-asleep state, I felt He Yue adjust the seat for me, making it more comfortable for me to lie flat.
Maybe I was too tired. I fell asleep and when I woke up it was already morning.
I rubbed my eyes, got up and saw that He Yue was not in the car. The roof was closed and the heater was on. Through the car window, I saw that the sky over the sea level was already turning pale.
I sat up, and my coat slipped off. I found my phone and saw the time: it was already seven in the morning.
Sunai sent me a WeChat message, saying that Xiao An Ning had been comforted and asked me not to worry.
I put my phone back into my bag and looked around for He Yue.
He's not in now.
I opened the car door and got out. The early winter seaside made me shiver. I quickly took the coat from the car and put it on, then ran to find He Yue.
Before I had taken a few steps, I saw He Yue coming towards me from a distance. He was carrying two sandwich boxes and two glasses of milk, and he was wearing a thin sweater.
I was about to take off my coat and give it back to him, but he walked right past me and said, "Put it on and get in the car."
I didn't dare to disobey him, so I followed him into the car obediently.
He Yue handed me a hot breakfast and said, "Eat first. I'll take you to school after you finish."
"Hmm." I bit into the sandwich he handed me and started eating in silence.
After breakfast, He Yue drove me to school. When I got off the car, I returned my coat to He Yue and whispered "thank you".
He Yue didn't think it was a big deal. He told me, "Make a light dinner so we can eat together when I get back."
"Oh, okay." I responded quickly, as obedient as his slave.
He Yue nodded and drove away.
I watched He Yue's car drive away until it disappeared, then I slowly walked towards the school.
At the school gate, members of the roller skating club were swarming in from the direction of the off-campus dormitories. Surrounding them were boys skating, and I felt a little uncomfortable being squeezed in the middle.
A hand suddenly grabbed my arm and pulled me aside, and before I could see clearly, the person roller skated past me and skated into the school.
I raised my head and watched the figure slide to the school gate.
He looked back at me and left with the other members.
It was Qiao Xinyu. I haven’t seen him since we last met at the beach.
I shook my head, tapped my head gently, and said, "Don't think about it, Shen Muxi, go to class."
Unconsciously, life began to become chaotic. I was a little confused, even a little helpless. If I hadn't seen the normal appearance of people coming and going on the streets around the school, it would have been hard for me to imagine how insignificant I was in this world.
After returning to Qingshui Bay in the evening, I cooked corn porridge and fried two side dishes. Just as I put the food on the table, He Yue came back.
I walked over, took He Yue's coat and hung it on the hanger, and asked, "Is the company busy?"
"No, I went to bring you good news." He Yue tugged at his tie and walked to the dining table and sat down. "I'm so hungry."
Then, without further ado, he began to eat.
I sat opposite He Yue and asked, "What good news do you have for me?"
He Yue chewed his food and said, "Li Chuan listened to your song and wanted to make an appointment to meet you."
"Is it true?" I asked He Yue in disbelief.
He Yue swallowed the food and said, "Let's make an appointment so I can tell Li Chuan."
"I, I, I..." I was a little incoherent, and quickly took out my phone and said, "I'll ask them, right away."
I quickly called Sunai and Xiao Anning and told them about this.
Xiao Anning was silent for a while on the phone, then said, "Muxi, you pick the time. I'll skip classes even if I have classes. I'm sorry for what I said last time."
"It's okay. I'll pick a time to tell you." My heart softened when I heard Xiao Anning apologize in a low voice on the other end of the phone.
"Okay, I'll contact you then." Xiao Anning said.
I hung up the phone, looked up at He Yue, and asked, "Is Friday afternoon okay?"
"Let's talk to him at three o'clock on Friday afternoon." He Yue took out his cell phone and sent a text message to Li Chuan.
I looked at He Yue eagerly and asked, "Will you go?"
"I have something to do on Friday and can't go." He Yue was texting intently.
I rubbed my thighs and said embarrassedly, "If you don't go, I'll be very nervous..."
He Yue's fingers suddenly stopped, he looked up at me, a smile hidden in the corner of his mouth, and asked: "Are you so dependent on me?"
My face turned red and I quickly explained, "No! I mean, after all, you are the introducer. If you weren't here, I would definitely be nervous. Besides, he is the music director of Konjac Records, what a person of high status! I am just a nobody, I would probably be so scared that my legs would go weak before I even met him."
He Yue smiled and said, "Don't be nervous. Li Chuan has been my friend for many years. He is a very nice person, and Min You will receive you at Konjac Records. Just call me if you have anything."
"Okay then," I compromised, resting my chin on the table, feeling a little uncertain.
"There is another piece of news." He Yue put down his chopsticks, crossed his hands on the table, and said, "It's about your friend named Xiao."
I stood up and asked, "What's wrong?"
He Yue stood up and took out a stack of documents from his briefcase and gave them to me. I flipped through them and found that they were relevant information about Mr. Liu, including his family and hobbies.
I couldn't help but laugh and said, "Liu Kai actually kept two women at the same time, and there was a pregnant woman in the house. It turns out that a person's appearance is written on his face."
"This Liu Kai is a cat that loves to steal fish. The shares of his current company were given by his father-in-law, so he is very afraid of his wife and father-in-law. Here are the addresses of his company and home. If he bullies your friend again, you can send these evidences to his father-in-law and his wife." He Yue told me vividly.
Seeing his beaming face, I couldn't help but joked, "Mr. He, it's Sherlock Holmes."
"Now Holmes wants you to put down what you are holding and have dinner with him." He Yue signaled me with his eyes to put down the documents in my hand.
I obediently put down the documents and replied, "Yes, sir!"
I held the corn porridge in my hand, and looked up at He Yue from time to time, with a smile unconsciously appearing on the corners of my mouth.
In a blink of an eye, it was time to meet Li Chuan.
I called Sunai as soon as the get out of class was over, but Sunai told me that she was busy and couldn't go.
"What could be more important than meeting Li Chuan? Nana, we have already made an appointment with him." I rushed to Suna's dormitory holding my phone and said, "I'll go to your dormitory to find you."
Sunai's voice of rejection came: "Muxi, I'm not in the dormitory. I have something really urgent to do now. I'll talk to you later."
"Is there anything more important than meeting Lichuan?" I didn't give up.
"Yes, yes, it's more important than meeting Lichuan!" Sunai looked very anxious and said to me quickly, "I'm sorry, Muxi, please go with Xiao Anning, I'll talk to you later." After that, she hung up the phone.
I bit my lip and called Xiao Anning again, but her phone was busy.
I started to panic and didn't know what to do, so I had to stop a car and rush to Konjac Records.
In the car, I was in a hurry and kept calling and sending WeChat messages to Xiao Anning, but she didn't reply to any of my messages. We had agreed to go together as a group of three, but now I was the only one left.
Because of my personality, I don't know what to do .
I called He Yue immediately and said in a tearful voice, "He Yue, Sunai can't go because of something, and I can't get through to Xiao Anning. What should I do? I'm on the way to Mokong Records now."
"I'm out of town now. I'll call Min You to pick you up. Shen Muxi, you go by yourself. It's their business if they missed the opportunity, but you can't miss it. Do you understand?" He Yue said.
“But I want to be with them…”
"Shen Muxi!" He Yue stopped me, "This is your own life. If you can't face these difficulties alone, you can only stay in the greenhouse and wait for death for the rest of your life."
I was stunned and didn't dare to speak anymore.
He Yue lowered his voice and said, "Wait for your good news." After that, he hung up the phone.
I looked at my phone, leaning back on the seat in front of me in distress.
The taxi soon arrived downstairs of Konjac Records, and Min You came downstairs to pick me up. He saw me getting out of the car alone and asked, "Ms. Shen, why are you alone?"
"Yes, it's just me." I said listlessly, "They all have something to do and can't come."
"That's not a good idea." Min You raised his hand and motioned for me to follow him into the company.
I followed him and asked, "Can I explain this to Li Chuan? Will he be angry?"
Min You led the way and said, "Director Li is a man who values his credibility. You agreed to meet him with three people, but now you are alone. I'm afraid it will be a bit troublesome."
"What should we do? Min You, I'm so scared that I almost pee." I followed Min You closely, getting so nervous that I couldn't stop talking.
Min You smiled and said, "I will go in with you later and stand aside. You can't show fear. You have to be calm and composed, okay?"
"I know, I know." I nodded like a chick pecking at rice.
"We're here. This is it." Min You stood in front of a door with a sign that read "Music Director" hanging on the wall.
I covered my chest and laughed awkwardly at Minyou.
Minyou patted my shoulder, signaling me to calm down, and then knocked on the office door.
"Come in." A deep voice sounded.
I couldn't help but grin. The voice was so strong and powerful that I knew he was someone who was not easy to mess with.
Min You pushed the door open and walked in. I hid behind him, not daring to look at the people in the office.
Min You turned around and pulled me out, and whispered, "Why are you hiding behind me?" Then, he said to Li Chuan, "Director Li, Miss Shen is here to see you."
I exhaled, raised my head, and looked around the office.
The office is spacious, with an office room, a reception room, and a treadmill next to the French window. Li Chuan stood by the French window, holding a cup of coffee in his hand, wearing a dark purple shirt, with his back to us.
Min You patted me on the shoulder, and I quickly bowed slightly and said, "Director Li, hello, I'm Shen Muxi."
Li Chuan turned around slowly. He had strong features and a sturdy body, and his combed hair made him look smart and capable.
"Are you alone?" Li Chuan frowned slightly.
I instantly became nervous and kept glancing at Min You.
Min You saw my pleading look and said, "Director Li, because..."
"I'm asking her." Li Chuan interrupted Min You and said.
His aura was so strong that I twirled my fingers, not knowing what to do.
Minyou nudged my back with his elbow, asking me to answer Li Chuan quickly. I swallowed, straightened my chest and said, "I'm sorry, Director Li, this is my mistake. My two friends were busy with important matters, so they couldn't come."
Li Chuan took a breath, walked over, put the coffee cup on the table, and said, "That means your two friends stood me up. Since they didn't come, you don't have to come."
"Director Li," I explained, "We were indeed wrong in this matter. Please give us a chance. I am really grateful to Senior He Yue and you for your help. I am willing to listen to our cover."
Li Chuan smiled calmly and said, "The little girl looks honest, but she actually thought of using He Yue as a shield to negotiate with me."
Being seen through my thoughts, I felt a little embarrassed, so I lowered my head and said, "Director Li, you are a person with aura. I was afraid, so I thought of moving He Yue out."
"I'm not a man-eating tiger." Li Chuan's low voice struck my heart, and his every word and action made me terrified.
"But I'm not someone who is easy to talk to. You two didn't keep your word and stood me up together. Do you think I will still give you this chance?" Li Chuan crossed his arms, leaned on the edge of the table, and glanced at me out of the corner of his eye.
Now that things have come to this, no matter how I explain, it’s useless.
I took a deep breath and said, "It's reasonable for Director Li not to give me a chance this time, but I will definitely work hard and produce good works to make Director Li willing to give us another chance."
"I'm looking forward to it." Li Chuan curled his lips and smiled, shifting his gaze to Min You.
Min You quickly stretched out his hand to signal me that I could leave.
I bowed to Lichuan and followed Minyou out.
As soon as I got out, I felt completely exhausted. I threw my bag to Minyou and said, "Wait for me at the door. I'm going to the bathroom."
I turned and ran into the bathroom, gasping for air. I was so suffocated in Lichuan's office just now. It was the first time I met such a prestigious person, and I went there by mistake.
I washed my face at the sink, fixed my hair, and then walked out.
Minyou was waiting for me at the gate. When he saw me coming out, he asked with a smile, "Are you scared?"
"Yeah." I took the bag and replied.
"Actually, I don't think the result is that bad," Min You said.
"What do you mean?" I asked him, looking up.
Min You smiled and said, "I don't think Li Chuan is angry, he just wants to give you a warning. Normally if he doesn't want to see someone, he would just ask the person to leave, but he just listened to a lot of things you said."
I looked at Minyou with shining eyes and asked excitedly, "Are you saying I still have a chance?"
"Most likely, after all, you sing really well." Min You said.
"Ah!" I jumped up excitedly and gave Min You a bear hug.
Min You staggered when I pounced on him. I kept spinning in circles and said, "If you really give me this opportunity, I will do anything for him! Min You, are you serious? I can't hold back my excitement!"
Min You was amused by me and said, "When you go back, you should think of a way to resolve the issue of Director Li being stood up. It would be best if you bring the two of them here to apologize. Director Li might meet with you again for He Yue's sake."
I put my hands together and said like a pitiful person: "Minyou, thank you, and thank you He Yue."
"You don't have to thank me. Thank He Yue instead. The car is here." Min You stopped a car for me, and after sending me to the car, he reminded me, "Don't cause trouble next time."
"Yes!" I saluted Min You and waved goodbye to him.
I sent a message in the WeChat group, telling Su Nai and Xiao An Ning what happened. If they have time, they can go together to apologize to Li Chuan.
Then I called He Yue again.
"How did things go?" He Yue was on his way home.
"Director Li said we stood him up and he was very unhappy." I pouted.
