In the following days, my relationship with Ji Chuan seemed to have returned to the closeness of the past. He would come to me every day after class at noon, and stay with me all lunch. When we ate, he would always put meat in my bowl. Not only that, almost every day Ji Chuan would take some photos with me, and then post them on Weibo and Moments as if to announce it to the world.
I regarded Ji Chuan's deliberate way of showing off our affection as his apology to me, and I didn't stop him. I just cooperated with him and followed his wishes no matter what he said.
We both seemed to have noticed something and were doubly nice to each other, as if this was all we needed to do to pretend that nothing had happened.
I told myself that as long as I believed in myself, I would be able to return to the way our love was at the beginning, and I would be able to pretend that I knew nothing and continue to be with Ji Chuan.
However, I forgot that a broken mirror can never be mended, and spilled water is always the hardest to recover.
Actually, my requirements for love are not high at all. I just hope that the boy I like can keep me in his heart; when I am sad, he will hold me in his arms and comfort me; when I am lonely, he will do everything he can to make me happy; when I am bullied by others, he can stand in front of me and protect me. All my aspirations for love are just this.
It is such a simple requirement, but it is extremely difficult to achieve.
Time passed quickly, and Xiaoyu's mathematical modeling competition ended. She got a good ranking and became the pride of their entire department.
I went to her house with Xiaoyu on purpose. That day, Xiaoyu's parents cooked many dishes to celebrate for Xiaoyu.
In fact, I envy Xiaoyu very much. She has a good father and a good mother, which is what I want but can never get. My father's attitude towards me remains the same, and I don't expect him to make a shocking change. After all, he has been like this for 19 years.
The person who has changed the most in recent days is Yao Yizhou. After Ji Chuan and I reconciled, he sneaked away every day under the pretext of practicing violin.
Soon, I had been working and studying in the milk tea shop for almost a month.
It was the weekend, in the afternoon, Yao Yizhou came to the milk tea shop to accompany me. He knew that I had been hanging out with Ji Chuan recently, so he called me in advance and came to accompany me after learning that I was alone in the milk tea shop.
I made a cup of signature milk tea for Yao Yizhou. He took the milk tea and asked me with a smile: "Xiaoya, why didn't Ji Chuan come to accompany you?"
When I heard Yao Yizhou ask this, I thought he was joking that Ji Chuan and I were like conjoined twins recently, and my face turned red. "I didn't tell Ji Chuan about my part-time job. I wanted to buy him a gift after I got my salary, and then I'll tell him about my part-time job."
Yao Yizhou's eyes dimmed noticeably. He said nothing and lowered his head to drink his milk tea.
I couldn't guess what Yao Yizhou was thinking, so I could only jokingly say, "Yizhou, what gift do you want? Think about it carefully. If you miss this opportunity, you may never get it again. Be careful that I change my mind."
Yao Yizhou's eyes seemed to be wet. He showed a nice smile and said softly, "I want to change my violin. What, are you going to buy it for me?"
I covered my mouth and laughed, "Yizhou, please forgive me. You can choose anything within a hundred yuan, but if it's more than a hundred yuan, I can't do anything. Please be magnanimous and forgive me this time."
Yao Yizhou shook his head helplessly. "For a stingy person like you, I can only say that our friendship can no longer continue. Let's put it this way, ask yourself, what gifts have you given me over the years? You can count them on one hand! You gave me a diary when I was in the second year of high school... or you used it, right? I looked carefully and found that many pages were torn off. Did you write something shameful on it that had to be torn off to cover it up?"
There were no new customers in the milk tea shop, so I continued chatting with him: "Yao Yizhou, I can't tell that you have a lot of opinions and complaints about me over the years! How about this, I'll give you a chance today to let you get it out? Don't mention that diary anymore, I gave it to you by mistake, and I couldn't get it back later, so I had to secretly tear up my diary when you weren't paying attention."
Yao Yizhou took a sip of milk tea and waved his hands hastily: "You are wrongly accusing me of that. How could I dare to have any opinion about you? That's too harsh, too harsh!"
Just when I was about to tease Yao Yizhou, a girl walked in holding Ji Chuan's arm.
I have an impression of this girl. She was the one who was very intimate with Ji Chuan when I first saw her in the Taekwondo practice room.
I saw the girl holding Ji Chuan's arm, the smile on her face gradually faded, and after a while she moved her gaze to Ji Chuan's face.
Ji Chuan's eyes were full of surprise, and he seemed surprised to see me in the milk tea shop.
Ji Chuan unnoticeably removed the girl's hand from his body, walked over quickly, stood beside me as if nothing had happened, and asked me with a smile: "Xiao Ya, why are you here? When did you find a part-time job? Why didn't you tell me ? Before, I asked you where you went after class every afternoon, didn't you say you went home?"
Before I could say anything, the girl next to him walked up to Ji Chuan, snuggled up to him, pouted her lips and said cutely: "Yeah, senior sister, why didn't you tell us? If we had known you were working here, we would have come here to patronize your business a long time ago." This girl was not at all shy and her attitude towards me was not like that of a stranger at all.
I looked at the bright smile on her face, and immediately a burning anger rose in my heart. What made me most angry was that she acted like a spoiled child in front of Ji Chuan, and Ji Chuan actually looked at her with a smile on his face.
It was so outrageous! It was so outrageous! They dared to be so intimate in front of me, totally ignoring me. It was so hateful! I glared at them both, and slowly clenched my hands into fists.
I suddenly remembered that when I talked to Ji Chuan on the phone last night, he told me that he would be very busy today and had an appointment with a group of junior high school classmates to go out and play. I also expressed my regret for not being able to accompany him and apologized to him. Now I see him openly going out with other girls. It's so ironic!
Seeing them being so close to each other, the more I thought about it, the more I felt that I was so stupid. I actually believed his lies, believed that I could take back what I said, believed that he was busy, believed that he was going to attend a junior high school reunion, and even wanted to give him a gift, and was still looking forward to his surprised expression when he received the gift! Now it seems that I haven't given him a surprise yet, but he gave me a surprise!
That girl seemed to be doing it on purpose. The more I stared at her, the more she leaned towards Ji Chuan, as if she had no bones.
Seeing her like this, I couldn't control my anger and asked coldly, "Ji Chuan, is this your new girlfriend? Do you want to bring her here for me to see?"
Ji Chuan, who was originally smiling, gradually lost his smile after hearing my sarcasm. He frowned and scolded, "Wen Ya, can you stop being so sarcastic? Didn't I tell you not to be so suspicious? You are always chatting and laughing with other boys, and I have never said anything to you."
When Ji Chuan said this, he turned his head and looked at Yao Yizhou. Yao Yizhou did not retreat, but looked directly at Ji Chuan with his head held high.
I looked at Ji Chuan in surprise, and I couldn't believe that those words came out of his mouth. My heart was extremely painful, but I could only suppress the bitterness and sadness in my heart, snorted coldly, and said in a cold tone: "Yao Yizhou is not only my high school classmate, but also my college classmate. Similarly, he is also your classmate and your schoolmate! Just because I said a few more words to Yao Yizhou, you brought girls to ridicule me? Are you still a man ? I tell you, Ji Chuan, in my heart, any man is a hundred times better than you! What you did is simply disgusting and makes me sick!"
Ji Chuan's eyes gradually turned cold. He didn't argue with me, but stood there for a long time without saying a word. After a while, he turned around and left.
A hint of pride flashed across the girl's face. She snorted coldly and hurriedly chased after Ji Chuan.
Watching Ji Chuan and the girl leave one after another, I felt cold all over.
I bit my lips, and the tears that had been welling up in my eyes finally slid down my cheeks uncontrollably.
Yao Yizhou walked over to me, leaned over to wipe away the tears from my eyes, and comforted me softly: "Xiaoya, it's okay, I'm here."
I thought carefully about what I had just said, and I couldn't believe that those words came out of my mouth. Suddenly, I hated myself, and Yao Yizhou's consolation became the fuse of my emotional breakdown.
I tried hard to hold back my tears, covered my face and let the tears fall down my face, sobbing, "I hate myself now, crying like a petty little woman."
"It's okay, Xiaoya, I'm still here with you."
Yao Yizhou comforted me softly, but my body seemed to be out of control and couldn't stop shaking.
A huge sadness surged up in my heart and instantly overwhelmed me. My legs had no strength at all and I fell to the ground.
I buried my head in my knees, feeling sad in waves, weighing me down so hard that I couldn't even straighten my back. There seemed to be a voice in my heart mocking me for being abandoned by the world alone. I wanted to refute, to argue, to compete with this mocking voice , but ironically, I found that I had no ability to refute at all. I felt like I had fallen into endless darkness, isolated and helpless.
Yao Yizhou squatted down, held me in his arms, leaned my head against his chest, and whispered softly: "Xiaoya, no matter what happens, I will always be with you. You are never alone."
Listening to Yao Yizhou's words, I couldn't help but burst into tears, wantonly venting my inner pain, grievances and helplessness. At this moment, my world seemed to be collapsing bit by bit.
There is no more Ji Chuan, no more boy who said he wanted to hold my hand and spend his life with me, no more boy who only wanted to make me happy, and the future that I had planned to build with him has also disappeared, destroyed to the point where not even ashes are left.