Chapter 3: The Unforgettable Years 02
With only ten days left until the Chinese New Year, Shen Huai drove his mother over.
They packed a trunk full of luggage, and emptied out half of the house. After getting out of the car, my mother stood there and looked around. The neighbors were very enthusiastic when they saw her, asking her questions and praising her for her good fortune.
Shen Huai was moving the luggage while smiling and greeting them. I quietly helped Shen Huai, but he snatched the bags from my hands and insisted that I not do anything.
"Uncle Shen, how is the flower shop business lately?" I couldn't find an opportunity to help, so I stepped aside.
"Same as usual, neither good nor bad. After the New Year, we will stay in City C for a while before going back." Shen Huai's face was full of joy, and as he said this, he cast a loving look at his mother.
My mother was chatting and laughing with those aunts. I haven't heard her laugh so happily for a long time.
"Yeah, that's good." I nodded. "Mom is too tired to drive a taxi. I want her to change jobs. You can persuade her more when you have time."
"The car was sold. Didn't your mother tell you?" Shen Huai closed the trunk, quite surprised.
"Sold?" I was even more surprised.
"Ah, it happened last month. Oh, that's right, you were preparing for the exam at that time, so we didn't disturb you." Shen Huai touched the back of his head sheepishly and looked at me awkwardly.
I feel like he's a little weird, but I can't really describe what's wrong with him.
"Wei Yang, your mother and I have to go out for something later, you don't have to wait for us for dinner." Shen Huai said excitedly, wiping the sweat from his forehead.
I thought they wanted to be alone together, so I nodded knowingly, "Okay..."
He patted my shoulder with relief and walked to my mother. I saw that they couldn't come up for a while, so I went into the house first.
At this moment, the wound in my heart that was cut by Fang Chongyan gradually healed because of Shen Huai. Maybe I shouldn't ask for too much, God has been full of grace to me, and the companionship and fatherly love that I lost in my childhood, it has now returned to me in another way.
If I have any wish, it is probably that I hope this family can always be so simple and happy.
Since the winter vacation, I have been very lazy and often stay in bed. When I get up, Shen Huai and my mother are gone. I don’t know what they are busy with.
After my mother came, Shen Huai never let her cook. He prepared delicious food for her in different ways for three meals. My mother was picky about food and would not eat many foods. Shen Huai often tried his best to please her. I had seen Shen Huai's thoughtfulness and attentiveness towards her, so I didn't think much about it.
The house is fully stocked with New Year's goods. Shen Huai also bought a big-brand woolen coat for me and my mother respectively. I don't recognize the brand, but I can feel that the fabric is not cheap just by touching it.
On New Year's Eve, the family cooked a big pot of dumplings. My mother said that she hadn't come back to visit for a long time and wanted to send some to the neighbors. Shen Huai was afraid that she would be tired, so he accompanied her to deliver dumplings door to door.
I watched TV for a while and felt bored. I suddenly wanted to look at my childhood photos, so I went to the master bedroom to look for them. I looked through several drawers but couldn't find them. When I was looking through the bedside table, a few pieces of paper accidentally fell out.
I glanced at it unintentionally and saw my mother's name. I picked up the form and found that it was from the hospital. The more I read, the more my brows furrowed unconsciously.
"Fetus... 12 weeks... advanced maternal age..." I turned on the bedside lamp and these few words I made out from the scribbled handwriting pricked my eyes like needles.
No wonder they went out without telling me, no wonder Shen Huai tried every means to supplement his mother's nutrition, no wonder Shen Huai looked at me with embarrassment and strangeness.
No wonder he had to sell his taxi and move from that small place called Huacheng to City C.
No wonder... No wonder...
I held the list tightly, thousands of words choked in my throat, and my whole body felt extremely uncomfortable.
I have thought countless times whether I would mind if they had their own children. In the end, I just selfishly comforted myself that they would take my feelings into consideration and would not allow such a situation to happen, or they would discuss it with me and respect my opinion.
All along, I have been enjoying everything they gave me with peace of mind.
If you ask me if I have ever thought that our family of three is fine and there is no need to add another outsider, I think I don't have the confidence to deny it. However, if they really want to have another child, I will try to accept it, but why do they hide it from me ?
Is he afraid that I will be sad? Does Shen Huai still not consider me as a family member? So, even my mother is on his side. He kept such a big thing secret from his daughter?
Have they already thought about the future path, but I am not on this path?
I was immersed in great sorrow, tears streaming down my cheeks. The feeling of being deceived and the feeling of grief made me cry non-stop, and the pain was piercing my heart.
I heard someone calling me, and through tearful eyes I saw Shen Huai standing at the door.
"Wei Yang." He was wearing an apron and holding a bowl of dumplings for me to eat. Seeing my tearful face, he asked with concern, "What's wrong with you?"
As soon as he asked, my tears flowed even harder.
"Xu Xuan, come and see the child!" Shen Huai hurriedly called out to his mother, put down the bowl, and hurried over to pull me.
I was blinded by anger and deception. I pushed him hard and sobbed while holding up the list, "How could you do this... I saw everything. Mom... was pregnant... but you kept it a secret from me! What do you think of me? Do you plan to abandon your daughter now that you have your own child? You are just like Fang Chongyan, you don't plan to have me anymore..."
When I said the last word, someone started crying. The person in front of me was even more at a loss. He hurriedly explained, "Wei Yang, don't cry. We didn't hide it from you on purpose. Alas, it's not what you think. Just listen to your uncle's explanation."
Explain, explain, explain them all to me!
What’s the use of explaining!
"you shut up!"
I was shaking all over. Shen Huai's eyes turned red from my yelling. He wanted to talk to me but tried hard not to irritate me.
Mom had just entered the room, with her coat sleeves not yet put on. When she heard us quarreling, she came running over worriedly. Shen Huai rushed over to help her and told her to be careful. Their cautious actions, fearing that she would fall, brought tears to my eyes again.
I didn't want to stay any longer, I didn't want to watch them acting in front of me anymore. I felt like I couldn't calm down, at this moment, I just wanted to run away. I only saw their deception of me, I didn't want to hear any extra words.
"I don't want to see you anymore!"
Regardless of Shen Huai and my mother's calls, I held back my tears and ran out, slamming the door heavily. I couldn't hear their voices, as they were also heartbroken by me.
A terrible New Year's Eve.
I walked on the street like a wandering soul, thinking, perhaps in this city, no one is more miserable than me! Ten years ago, my father adopted a son, so I was abandoned by him; ten years later , my mother is pregnant again, so I am abandoned again.
There are very few pedestrians on the street. Well, it's New Year's Day, and people are either happily eating New Year's Eve dinner or watching the Spring Festival Gala around the fire. Why would there be people like me wandering around the street?
The snow had not yet completely melted, and the big red lanterns hanging high on the branches formed a sharp contrast with my pale face. Because I was in a hurry to go out, I even forgot to wear a coat, and my mobile phone was out of battery and turned off. I was blowing in the cold wind all the way, and my mood gradually calmed down.
Maybe I should listen to what they say. After all, my mother's pregnancy is a big deal, and she is already 40 years old. She must be struggling in her heart? Maybe they want to tell me, but they just haven't found the right opportunity... These questions have been tormenting me.
In fact, I regretted it as soon as I rushed out the door, but my awkward self-esteem made me not want to go home out of spite.
I sat on a bench in the park, thinking back to when I was a kid, I would always keep silent and endure arguments with my mother. Objectively speaking, I was a well-behaved child, and I always kept my thoughts to myself.
Lin Jiaxuan once said that I was lifeless water and had never been hit by a rock. I think I just took in too many falling rocks, and when these falling rocks reached their limit, they would turn into huge waves.
I calmly thought about where I could go. Lin Jiaxuan's place was out of the question, even if I knew his cell phone number by heart and had a few coins in my pocket for the ride.
There is no need to even think about Fang Chongyan's home. I am not stupid enough to jump out of one place where I am angry and then jump into another place where I am angry. Besides, I said such words to him a while ago.
Well, I only have one place left to go.
