Is it you who has changed, or my feelings towards you? Why do I feel like something important is missing? Or, you can only be a beautiful memory to me...
——Xia Zimu

In the early morning, a ray of sunlight lazily fell on my eyelids, making me feel warm. I slowly opened my eyes and quietly enjoyed this warmth.
Because the school is holding an art exhibition today, we have a day off and the students can decide whether to visit the exhibition or not.
I lay happily in bed and didn't even think about going to the art exhibition.
Just then, there was a hurried knock on the door in the originally quiet room.
Did I hear it wrong?
I continued to lie in bed with some doubts, refusing to get up.
“Boom boom boom…”
The knocking on the door continued. I got out of bed in annoyance and ran to the door.
When I opened the door and saw Xiaole's bright smiling face, I reached out and rubbed my eyes again, feeling like I was still dreaming.
Why is Xiaole here? Isn’t she very interested in this art exhibition?
"You...didn't you go to the school's art exhibition?" I asked this question as I took a few steps back and invited her in.
Xiaole just stood in front of the door with a mysterious smile on his face, and didn't seem to have any intention of coming in.
She looked me up and down, then stretched out a finger and shook it in front of me: "Zi Mu, you really don't plan to go out like this?"
I nodded hesitantly, not knowing what Xiaole's intention was, because I had already told her yesterday that I would not visit the art exhibition today.
Xiaole sighed with pretended regret: "I suggest you go, because you will see things that interest you, such as..."
Having said this, she paused playfully and observed my reaction.
I remembered that Ye Lanluo told me yesterday that he once studied painting...
My eyes gradually brightened up, and I had already guessed about 70% of the answer.
As expected, Xiaole continued, "There will be works by Gu Yichen and Ye Lanluo there. Zimu, don't you think this is a good opportunity to get to know them?"
Xiaole’s words gave me an epiphany.
Yes, this is indeed a good opportunity!
Xiaole saw the change in my expression and asked with a smile: "How about you going or not? If not, I'll leave..."
As she spoke, she slowly turned around and took a step forward.
"Wait a minute!" I was standing there in a daze, but suddenly I said these three words in a loud voice , backing up and saying, "Give me five minutes, I'll be quick!"
After saying that, I ran to my room and looked for clothes to wear for today's art exhibition.
Xiaole continued to say loudly outside: "There will be a chance to meet Gu Yichen and Ye Lanluo——"
"Shua!" My face became hot because of this sentence.
How could Xiaole know what I was thinking?
Without having time to think about this question, I packed myself up as quickly as possible, took Xiaole's hand and ran to the school art exhibition hall.
Xiaole and I quickly arrived at the door of the exhibition hall.
Although it was still early, many students had already gathered here. Some of them were holding cameras and taking pictures of their favorite works with expressions of admiration.
Xiaole and I held hands and slowly looked at the painting starting from the first one, but my mind was not here. I was paying attention to the works of Gu Yichen and Ye Lanluo.
One after another, outstanding works are hung quietly on the snow-white walls.
I stared at the signature of the work, constantly looking for that familiar name.
Xiaole enthusiastically expressed his opinions on those works beside me, but I simply agreed with him.
It is said that painting can express a person’s true inner world, so what would their world be like?
It must be a world that I don’t know and understand…
Suddenly, a tranquil sketch came into view, and a wonderful feeling gently touched my heart and soul, making me tremble slightly.
I slowly lowered my head and looked at the signature below.
It was indeed Gu Yichen.
I breathed a sigh of relief, smiled unconsciously, and stared at the sketch carefully. I have to admit that Gu Yichen's painting skills are very good.
It was a small girl, occupying most of the paper. She stood there alone, looking in an unknown direction, but there was no heart-breaking melancholy, only the confusion that belonged to that age.
My heartbeat suddenly quickened again.
The girl in this painting gives me a very familiar feeling.
I reached out and gently stroked the girl in the sketch, pursing my lips.
This girl... looks a lot like me when I was little...
The corners of his mouth seemed unable to restrain themselves and kept rising.
I stared at the painting for a long time before I carefully took out my camera, found the best angle, and took a picture of the painting.
At this moment, Xiaole's voice rang out, interrupting my contemplation: "Zimu, I found Ye Lanluo's work!"
Xiaole pointed at the wall in front of him with his hand, and said with a look of amazement, "I really can't believe that this is Ye Lanluo's work. It seems that this guy has many admirable qualities..."
My eyes were fixed on the oil painting signed by Ye Lanluo, and my mind was bewitched by the gorgeous colors.
It was an extremely beautiful oil painting, with brilliant but not dazzling colors. Under the azure sky were large tracts of sunflowers, golden yellow, just like the bright sunshine outside the window at this moment. I could almost smell the unique fragrance of sunflowers.
What attracted my attention most was the girl among the sunflowers. Her smile was brighter than the sunflowers. She stood among the large fields of golden sunflowers, her black hair gently flying in the air, and her eyes reflected the blue sky.
I couldn't help but utter an exclamation.
I don’t know why, but when I saw this oil painting at this moment, I was suddenly immersed in my past memories.
That beautiful garden and those clean and clear eyes that I can never forget.
I even forgot to take out my camera to record the amazing painting in front of me.
I looked at the painting in front of me and lost myself in it. I was completely attracted to it. I seemed to have become the girl in the painting, standing happily in a large field of beautiful sunflowers, with an irrepressible joy in my heart.
This feeling……
Is it because you remembered Gu Yichen?
This scene has appeared in my dreams many times...
Gu Yichen and I stood hand in hand in a field of sunflowers, smiling at each other. We were surrounded by the brilliant colors of the sunflowers, wrapped in the unique fragrance of the sunflowers, and infected by the bright atmosphere of the sunflowers...
Gu Yichen, do you still remember our agreement?
I stretched out my hand, placed it on my heart, and quietly felt the strange heartbeat.
Suddenly, an idea flashed through my mind and made me excited.
Maybe... I should let Gu Yichen know my thoughts. Maybe he still remembers the girl who used to play with him in the garden.
I want to tell him what I think. I have always liked him secretly...
My heart was beating violently, as if something was out of control and was about to burst out.
Because of this sudden idea, I almost lost the desire to continue looking at the painting.
Come on! Xia Zimu, be brave and tell him what you think!
However, Gu Yichen's face and the face of the beautiful boy in his memory appeared alternately, but they could never overlap.
I think it’s probably because it’s been a long time.
My palms had already seeped out of sweat and became cold.
Should I say...
I was still hesitating, with two different ideas fighting fiercely in my mind.
Just then, a burst of screams and cheers interrupted my thoughts.
Why did such a commotion happen at the exhibition?
I put aside my chaotic thoughts for the moment and looked in the direction of the commotion with some curiosity.
"ah!"
I let out a low cry of surprise and looked straight at the man who was walking slowly from the entrance of the exhibition hall.
With an indifferent and defiant look in his eyes, he walked casually on his own path, turning a deaf ear to the calls from those around him...who else could it be but Gu Yichen?
"Gu Yichen, you are awesome!"
The cheers did not fade away because of his indifference, but became more and more enthusiastic.
"Yichen, I have carefully read your work!"
"Yichen! I've also taken a good look at your work!"
"Me too……"
Various words intertwined together, one after another, making my head buzz.
Gu Yichen continued walking at the same slow pace, occasionally stopping in front of a painting to look at it quietly and think.
But his eyes never fell on me...
But I couldn't bear to take my eyes off him.
The moment I saw that face, those past memories occupied my mind again, making all my actions and thoughts out of control. Only one voice kept echoing in my mind: Tell him, tell him how you feel, Xia Zimu!
Enticed by this voice, I moved my heavy feet towards Gu Yichen.
Because I was so nervous, my nails dug deeply into the palm of my hand, but I didn't feel any pain at all.
How should I tell him?
Should I abruptly tell him how I feel about him, or ask him if he remembers what happened?
Gu Yichen didn't notice my existence at all, as if I was a transparent person.
Finally, I gritted my teeth and decided to tell him my feelings directly.
After making this decision, I stopped hesitating and quickened my pace.
Perhaps my footsteps were too fast and attracted Gu Yichen's attention. He turned around with a little surprise, his eyes fell on my face, and a strange look flashed in his eyes at that moment.
“Swish!”
My face suddenly became hot.
I looked at Gu Yichen quietly, and then, as if I had made some important decision, I walked up to him and took a deep breath: "Gu Yichen, I..."
But my arm suddenly started to hurt severely!
I frowned uncomfortably and turned around in confusion, only to find to my surprise that a pair of slender and clean hands were firmly grasping my arms.
There was a familiar coolness in those hands.
I looked up and saw a familiar face. He was staring at me motionlessly, staring at me with an expression that I had never understood.
Night blue network!
Is he coming to the exhibition too?
But why is he grabbing me?
Ye Lanluo looked at me quietly, then glanced in the direction of Gu Yichen, and said softly, "Follow me."
"Well?"
Not knowing what was going on, I could only utter such a puzzled sound. Before I had the time to think about anything else, I was pulled away by Ye Lanluo.
He walked very fast, and I followed him breathlessly...
In a quiet corner of the exhibition hall.
There were a few not-very-good paintings hanging on the surrounding walls.
I looked at this place carefully, and my doubts grew stronger and stronger.
Why did Ye Lanluo suddenly bring me to this place?
And Ye Lanluo seems to be very strange today. Although he is usually quite indifferent, today seems to be the first time I see him angry...
I thought for a moment, then reluctantly asked, "Ye Lanluo, why are you..."
"Now, tell me what you wanted to do just now?" He didn't seem to care what question I wanted to ask, but interrupted me naturally, with a hint of arrogance in his tone that was not usually there.
I am confused.
Did Ye Lanluo suddenly pull me here just to ask this question? Could it be that he has seen through my thoughts?
Thinking of this, I couldn't help but feel a little depressed.
How could I be so obvious?
Gu Yichen must have noticed something just now, which is why he looked at me with such a strange look.
Ye Lanluo in front of him frowned slightly, his expression frighteningly gloomy.
Is he angry?
Before I could answer, Ye Lanluo asked word by word: "You just wanted to confess to Gu Yichen, right?"
I stood there blankly, feeling a little overwhelmed.
Ye Lanluo actually understood my thoughts!
My cheeks became hot again. I didn’t dare to look him in the eye and answered hesitantly: “Well…you are…um…I…”
Since he has already seen it, it would be futile for me to deny it.
After all, it's not something to be ashamed of, is it?
and……
I plucked up my courage and looked at Ye Lanluo quietly.
Ye Lanluo looked at me who was talking incoherently, and a trace of sadness flashed in his eyes.
I couldn't help but feel puzzled - what happened to him?
I raised my hand and patted my hot face with embarrassment, and said in a voice quieter than a mosquito: "Was it obvious what I did just now?"
When Ye Lanluo heard me say this, he was stunned for a moment, and then he showed an expression I had never seen before.
I saw him slightly raised the corner of his mouth, but the smile he revealed was not a soothing smile, but a smile that was sad and a little helpless.
Looking at Ye Lanluo like this, I quickly stopped what I was about to say and racked my brains to reflect on myself.
Did I just say something wrong again?
Why does he have such an expression?
I carefully recalled everything I had just said from beginning to end, and felt that I had not said anything that should not have been said. I just admitted the fact that I wanted to confess my feelings to Gu Yichen.
That shouldn't have a bad impact on Ye Lanluo's mood, right?
What's wrong with him?
"Are you... okay?" Looking at Ye Lanluo in this state , I felt a little worried. I stretched out my hand and gently shook it in front of him.
"Xia Zimu, just give up." He suddenly said this.
The tail sound echoed in the air, turning into an invisible shackle that strangled my throat.
His voice was so sad that I couldn't ignore it.
"Give up?" I repeated blankly, not really understanding why he said that.
Ye Lanluo's brows furrowed even deeper, as if he was thinking about how to say his next words.
In an instant, we fell into awkward silence again, and I could almost hear the sound of time passing by me.
Just when I couldn't stand this seemingly endless silence any longer and was about to muster up the courage to ask for clarification, Ye Lanluo's voice rang clearly in my ears again: "Give up on confessing your feelings to Gu Yichen."
"What?" I responded almost subconsciously, but in the next moment, I understood what he was talking about.
give up?
Why should I give up?
I looked at Ye Lanluo helplessly and gritted my teeth.
All my previous timid emotions disappeared, and I looked stubbornly into Ye Lanluo's dark eyes, questioning him with my eyes.
"Why did you say that?"
"Xia Zimu, you have to know..." His voice was unexpectedly calm, "Gu Yichen already has a girl he likes, and he is very cruel to all the girls who confess their love to him..."
Ye Lanluo said this to me, as if he was casually telling a fact that had nothing to do with me.
cruel?
The scene of Gu Yichen rejecting that girl last time suddenly popped up in my mind. It was really cruel...
But, is all this because he has someone he likes?
My lips were numb and trembled slightly. After a long time, I forced a smile: "Even so..."
"Xia Zimu, do you know that you are bringing shame upon yourself?" Ye Lanluo interrupted me again and said even more coldly.
To humiliate oneself...
When I heard these four words, I looked up in shock and looked at Ye Lanluo with an unbelievable look.
I just wanted to express my feelings to Gu Yichen. It was just such a simple thought. But why did others say that I was humiliating myself in the end?
Bitter tears were welling up in my eyes, and I tried desperately to control them from rolling down.
My self-esteem reminded me that if I shed tears in such a situation, I would only be looked down upon even more.
I quickly turned my head and looked towards a distant place.
It took a long time for the tears to disappear.
Ye Lanluo was still standing there, looking at me quietly.
But I didn't see any guilt in his eyes for hurting others.
This guy……
Did he do that on purpose?
Thinking of this, anger instantly rose to my heart, making my breathing become a little rapid.
But why did he come to tell me all these things? He obviously knew nothing!
He must have said that because he looked down on me!
"Ye Lanluo, what right do you have to say that I am asking for trouble?" Anger made me lose my mind and I chose to use the most intense language to face Ye Lanluo. I looked at him angrily, "In your opinion, admitting my feelings is asking for trouble?"
I enunciated each word with great emphasis and made loud noises.
My hysterical questions echoed in the long and narrow exhibition hall.
Many students who were quietly appreciating the paintings looked over here with curiosity and dissatisfaction.
But I had no time to care about these things, my mind was full of what Ye Lanluo had just said.
Am I really bringing shame upon myself?
But I was not wrong!
If I like someone and I express my feelings bravely, even if he or she already has someone he or she likes, I will not think that is humiliating!
"Xia Zimu, are you happy to let so many people see you being rejected and let so many people laugh at you?" Ye Lanluo looked at me quietly, the haze in his eyes became thicker and thicker. This was the first time that Ye Lanluo spoke to me so loudly.
joke?
Am I just a joke in Ye Lanluo's eyes?
I just want to express my feelings!
When I heard Ye Lanluo's words, my chest felt like it was being pressed down by a stone. I felt so suffocated that I even found it difficult to breathe.
I lowered my head helplessly and chuckled: "Ye Lanluo, aren't you laughing at my joke?"
"Xia Zimu, do you think so?"
Ye Lanluo's voice suddenly became very soft, revealing deep disappointment.
I couldn't see Ye Lanluo's expression clearly, but when I heard his sad voice, my mood became more complicated.
"Isn't it? You self-righteous guy, you coward, no wonder the girl you like doesn't like you..." I shouted this without thinking.
But as soon as I said this, I regretted it.
I don't know why, but I became even more flustered. I raised my head and secretly observed Ye Lanluo...
There was no change in Ye Lanluo's expression. He just looked at somewhere quietly.
The surroundings became very quiet.
Just when I didn't know what to do, Ye Lanluo finally spoke.
His voice was very low, less clear than usual and more hoarse and pitiful.
"Xia Zimu, maybe I really shouldn't care about you."