Chapter 3 He is the light that illuminates the way forward 1
An Yannan was a ray of sunshine in her dark world, bringing supreme warmth and light into the narrow space where she couldn't see her hand in front of her face. But what was Lin Jianluo?
01
On a rare stormy night in S City, Shen Chuxue stood in front of the window, listening to the wind and watching the shadows of tree branches cast on the brick wall. Her breath spread out on the foggy glass, appearing warm but actually revealing the mark of coldness.
"Go to bed early and stop standing in front of the window all the time."
The door of the room was ajar. An Yannan passed by, knocked on the door and walked in.
She was unaware of it, and didn't know what she was looking at in the dark. The shadow reflected on the window was so lonely that it made people feel distressed. She lowered her eyebrows, and in such a snowy and icy place, her edges and corners finally softened, but this kind of fragility, except An Yannan, no one could see it.
She squinted her eyes slightly, and her voice was as playful as always: "I'm going to sleep now. Thank you, delivery man, for delivering milk so late at night?"
He closed the door and left, his eyes finally falling on Shen Chuxue's pale profile.
This night was very long. Shen Chuxue's cervical spine hurt, and she hardly slept. Most of the time, she frowned and looked at the ceiling. She seemed to be used to that kind of pain. She rubbed her eyebrows, trying to relieve the pain, but the quieter it was, the more unbearable it was. The roar of the outside world became louder and clearer. This night was as long as a century.
"Chuxue, did you not sleep well? You have big dark circles under your eyes..." Fan Qi pushed Shen Chuxue's shaking body.
The snow finally stopped today. She sat in the classroom waiting for the teacher to come, feeling a little drowsy - if the teacher came, Fan Qi would always wake her up.
She closed her eyes and nodded, saying, "I couldn't sleep when it started snowing. I have cervical spondylosis. Please give me a massage."
Just like a person who has been on the edge of a cold cliff for a long time, he always hopes that the source of warmth will come closer. Fan Qi seems to be such a character. She never cares what people outside say about Shen Chuxue, and always stays by her side, with endless things to say every day. In Fan Qi's heart, since Shen Chuxue doesn't like to talk, she will do the talking, otherwise life would be so boring.
No one can adapt to loneliness.
Fortunately, Fan Qi and An Yannan stayed by her side the whole time. Even the faint light of the fire could illuminate Shen Chuxue's confusion.
There are exams in the next two days, and there are a lot of people in the study room and the library. Shen Chuxue doesn't like going to crowded places, so she stays in the classroom.
There is no heating in S City, and the air conditioning is not turned on when there are no classes. The room is still very cold. Fan Qi still feels cold even with gloves and a scarf on.
But Shen Chuxue didn't seem to feel anything. She wore a dark blue coat, her long hair was loose, her fingertips were a little red, and when she wasn't reading, she would close her eyes and pretend to sleep, and she rarely spoke.
"Hatsuyuki, do you know? In the past few days, the news about you and that handsome guy in the department has spread to all the major departments! They all say that you are with the chairman and you want to be with the handsome guy in the department. You are very fickle."
Rumors are not scary, what is scary is the human heart. Shen Chuxue knew this truth early on. She was not surprised at what Fan Qi said, but was relieved. There was no need to say more about her relationship with An Yannan, she was too lazy to explain, let alone with Lin Jianluo.
This is probably the result I want...
"Do you really live with Chairman Anda?" Fan Qi asked curiously.
Shen Chuxue frowned, and finally opened her eyes to look at Fan Qi. She closed the book and asked curiously, "Living together? You are such a gossip radar expert, you know all this?"
People in this school only know that she is An Cenxi's nominal sister and that they live together, but few people know that she and An Yannan also live together. Fan Qi is well-informed.
Fan Qi waved his hand and said, "I'm telling you, this young girl with amorous feelings can do anything. Someone followed Chairman An Da home and found out that it was you who opened the door. Now it's all over the place, it's not a good story... Don't worry about it, I just want to ask you, I'm just curious."
After thinking for a while, Shen Chuxue nodded: "Yes, he is my adoptive father's nephew."
This relationship is really complicated... Come to think of it, apart from myself, this burden, An Wei is still very philanthropic. At least he takes good care of his nephew.
Shen Chuxue knew very well that her personality was not likable and she couldn't make people happy. It was like this when she was in the Lin family, and it was still like this after so many years in the An family.
Fan Qi said "Oh" and felt satisfied.
Just then, An Yannan came in. Fan Qi looked at An Yannan with an ambiguous look. This plot was like a romance novel! Childhood sweethearts, how wonderful! Shen Chuxue and An Yannan's looks also fit the feeling of the novel... So Fan Qi imagined a whole novel in his mind.
"Why are you here?" Shen Chuxue asked.
She doesn't like to talk, except when An Yannan is around, then she talks more, but only to An Yannan.
"I came to ask you what you want to eat for lunch. I'll buy it for you and you can eat at the Student Union. You have exams in the next two days, so there will be a lot of people in the cafeteria. After this class, you probably won't have anything you like to eat." An Yannan's voice was very gentle.
In fact, Fan Qi had never figured out how Shen Chuxue could hear the gentleness in An Yannan's voice. Others thought An Yannan was cold and his words were cold, just like his eyes. I'm afraid only Shen Chuxue would feel warm.
Shen Chuxue didn't stand up. Instead, she thought about it seriously and said, "I want to eat potatoes. As for the rest... I'll eat whatever you eat. I don't eat green peppers, so don't buy them for me on purpose!"
"okay."
It took about fifteen minutes to walk from the student union office building to the classroom. An Yannan came here just to ask Shen Chuxue what she wanted to eat. Shen Chuxue was a little dazed when she found this.
She looked at An Yannan's back with a rare warmth in her eyes.
Over the years, the amount of words she spoke to others in the An family was probably less than one-tenth of what she spoke to An Yannan.
Both of them knew that they were a burden to the An family and were not considered a family, so when choosing a room, they both chose the innermost room. When An Yannan opened the door of his room could see Shen Chuxue's room, which was just a few steps away.
She could always see An Yannan's back, for example, on the way to the library she always sat on the back rack of An Yannan's bicycle.
An Yannan learned to drive when he was 18. An Wei said he wanted to buy him a car so that he could go out more conveniently, but An Yannan refused, saying that riding a bicycle was fine. Unless An Cenxi also insisted on going out together, he would still use that bicycle to take Shen Chuxue to see the scenery of S City.
In Shen Chuxue's heart, An Yannan is more like a relative than Li Qiuhuo.
"Hey, it would be great if you two were really together. Look how considerate the Chairman is to you..." Fan Qi muttered.
Shen Chuxue heard it and just laughed: "An Yannan is different from others. We can't be together recklessly just because we are in love. I won't be with An Yannan either."
An Yannan was a ray of sunshine in her dark world, bringing supreme warmth and light into the narrow space where she couldn't see her hand in front of her face. But what was Lin Jianluo?
If An Yannan is the sunshine, then Lin Jianluo is the guide.
Lin Jianluo approached step by step, and she followed him step by step. She walked into Lin Jianluo's world and also into the hatred that she could not regret.
I don’t know what happened on this day, An Yannan came and Lin Jianluo also came.
The difference is that An Yannan was shining when he came, while Lin Jianluo was covered with wounds.
Shen Chuxue was a little confused at first, but after seeing Lin Jianluo, she became completely conscious and quickly stood up.
"What's wrong with you."
Lin Jianluo said nothing, grabbed Shen Chuxue's hand and took her out.
There were very few people on the playground of S University in the middle of winter. The few people there were just passing by. The place where the two people stayed was quite hidden and not many people saw them.
Both of their hands were cold, but when they were held together they unexpectedly became warm.
"What's wrong with you?" Shen Chuxue asked.
Lin Jianluo forced a smile, took out a bank card and a small wallet from his arms, and stuffed them into Shen Chuxue's hands under her surprised gaze.
"This is my New Year's money and all my savings, for you. I will take good care of you and protect you in the future. From now on, all my efforts will be for you." Lin Jianluo said.
Shen Chuxue looked down, her eyes a little cold.
Oh, how funny, all that the Lin family did, they actually wanted to buy it with such a small amount of money? Although she knew that Lin Jianluo had good intentions and couldn't blame him for those things, Shen Chuxue couldn't forget those deep memories whenever she thought of her grandmother lying in bed seriously ill.
She frowned and pushed her hand away: "I don't want it. I don't need your money."
"This is my money! It has nothing to do with my family! I ran away from home! I want to be with you, Shen Chuxue, I want to be with you!" Lin Jianluo's voice was so loud that Shen Chuxue's eardrums felt a little painful.
The bank cards and wallet in her hands seemed to weigh a thousand pounds, making her unable to lift her hands.
Her eyes became dry, she licked her lips, and said in a hoarse voice: "Lin Jianluo, it's not your fault. You don't have to pay off your parents' debts. You really don't have to do this."
You don't have to return all this to me on behalf of your parents, because you can never return a human life to me.
If grandma hadn't died, all of this would be fine. She wouldn't ask for things that didn't belong to her. The Lin family was just an inn, and she could let it go.
But grandma died, and she was left alone in this world, so pitiful and lonely... No matter what, the Lin family would have to pay the price.
"Hatsuyuki, I want to be with you."
She lowered her head, avoiding the question.
"Okay, I'll keep it for you. It's your investment... It's not a loss to invest in me." She paused and asked, "Then what happened to your injuries? Who did you fight with?"
Lin Jianluo smiled, scratched his head and said, "No, my dad beat me. I said I wanted to be with you, but my dad disagreed, so he beat me up... That's why I ran away from home. My dad said if I left, I shouldn't go back, isn't that better? Don't worry, I'm old enough, I can make money, and I'll take good care of you."
Did he have a fight with Lin Jingpeng?
Her eyes flickered, and the corners of her lips twitched into a somewhat bitter smile.
When she turned around, she saw An Yannan standing not far away, staring at the two people's hands that were tightly connected just now.
Shen Chuxue subconsciously withdrew her hand, looked at An Yannan awkwardly, frowned, and wanted to take a step forward, but stopped.
She watched An Yannan turn and leave.
In her memory, she could always see An Yannan turning around.
He seems to have worn this off-white coat for many years...
Shen Chuxue remembered that one year, An Yannan took her to a newly opened park. She fell down, and when she looked up, she saw a beige coat fluttering in front of her. Then An Yannan squatted down and helped her up...
One hand was holding her, and she was much shorter than An Yannan, so she could only look up at him...
The back figure became blurry in my eyes.
