Chapter 25: Turbulent Times (2)
In Lin Wei's bedroom, Zhao Ziheng carefully rubbed . There were only the two of them in the huge room. The whole space was so quiet that even the breathing could be heard. Being alone with Zhao Ziheng, and Zhao Ziheng holding her hand and rubbing the medicine on her, Lin Wei's heartbeat accelerated...
"Okay, remember, no matter if it's an injury or an illness, no matter how small it is, if you don't handle it carefully, it will cause unnecessary problems in the future. If it can be prevented, you should prevent it from the beginning--"
“Yes, yes—”
Zhao Ziheng spoke seriously and confidently. Although Lin Wei listened carefully, how much could she really remember? In this subtle space where the two of them were alone.
After applying the medicine to Lin Wei, he handed her hand back, then stood up and walked aside, looking at the night view outside the window, as if thinking about something? However, how could the smart Lin Wei not notice such an obvious action? She stroked the hand that Zhao Ziheng had just applied the medicine to her, and the sweetness in her heart was still there. Seeing that Zhao Ziheng seemed to be worried, she couldn't help but worry about him.
"Are you worried?"
"…Do you think so?"
Without beating around the bush or evading, Zhao Ziheng turned sideways and asked Lin Wei softly.
"Whenever you have something on your mind, you always have this expression—"
Zhao Ziheng was slightly startled when he heard Lin Wei's words. He didn't expect Lin Wei to be so clear. This surprised him a little. He had deliberately kept a distance from Lin Wei, but he didn't expect to be seen through. Thinking of this, Zhao Ziheng closed his eyes and thought for a while, then faced the window again: "I originally thought that this country and the world could maintain peace forever, but unfortunately it can't be as I wish."
"Oh? Why do you say that?"
"You also know that the emperor's uncle returned to the border a few days ago. Those people have already started to act. As early as more than a year ago, when I was acting as my father's government affairs before I ascended the throne, I found that an unknown small country was gradually expanding. I thought it was normal, but who knew that in just a short year, its power would expand far beyond my expectations-"
"Are you talking about Feiyan Kingdom?"
Zhao Ziheng suddenly talked about politics, and Lin Wei hit the nail on the head. It was obvious that this was not the first time they had discussed politics. And from Lin Wei's tone, she seemed to have some understanding of state affairs? Was it because her father was a university scholar?
"Well, I sent people to keep an eye on them a long time ago, but I still couldn't get the inside information. On the surface, they are still a small country, but in fact, they have absorbed many countries and become stronger. Judging from the current progress, the world will face a catastrophe sooner or later. And from the recent intelligence, they have already shown their claws to my border country. Their power is already at the level of competing with our Zhao country. If it were in the past, maybe we could easily suppress them, but-"
Zhao Ziheng fell silent in the middle of the conversation, his expression gloomy. Even so, Lin Wei was very clear that because of the death of the former King of Zhao and the twists and turns that Zhao Ziheng encountered after ascending the throne, and his brother Yu Mochao usurped the throne, the power of Zhao State was greatly weakened. If it weren't for Zhao Shu supporting the national defense, I'm afraid that Zhao State would have been devastated by now...
On the surface, Zhao Ziheng was indeed worried about state affairs, but Lin Wei felt that it was far more than that. Deep in Zhao Ziheng's heart, there was something shocking that she didn't know about. Although she had known for a long time that Zhao Ziheng was hiding something, as long as Zhao Ziheng didn't say it, Lin Wei remained silent and pretended not to know.
Just when Lin Wei was feeling uneasy about Zhao Ziheng's matter, Zhao Ziheng walked lightly to her side...
"It is no longer possible for my uncle to shoulder the heavy responsibility of defending Zhao State. After the enthronement ceremony is over tomorrow, I will set off for the border—"
Zhao Ziheng's words hit Lin Wei's heart like a bolt from the blue. They had just reunited and met again, but they were about to separate again. Moreover, this was something that would only happen at a critical juncture. Lin Wei didn't know how to respond.
"I have already arranged everything. Prime Minister Wang and Grand Secretary Lin will lead the important officials to handle government affairs. The border areas have also been ordered to set up new defense lines. As the king of a country, I have the obligation to inspect these, so -"
Once again, Zhao Ziheng was halfway through his conversation when he looked at Lin Wei, who had been keeping her head down and keeping silent. Suddenly, he stretched out his hands and held Lin Wei's hands tightly.
"Although I know that you are the one who will be hurt the most by doing this, I also know that I shouldn't leave you at this time. It was the same before. I always left you when you needed me the most. You can blame me or scold me, I will do anything as long as I can avoid making you sad."
Beat? Or scold? Lin Wei felt her heart bleeding. She no longer regarded Zhao Ziheng as a man who was both familiar and strange to her. Since the change three years ago, Lin Wei knew that she had already fallen in love with the current Zhao Ziheng, a man who was both familiar and strange to her. For more than a year, she had been alone in her empty room, enduring the gossip of others, silently praying for his return, just hoping that it would be just once, just for a while. She really hoped that this man she loved deeply could give her a little warmth, a chest for her to lean on. However, reality was always cruel and brutal...
"If you feel that you cannot eliminate the pain in your heart, I will give you absolute authority, an authority that can set you free. You can decide whether to stay in the palace according to your own wishes-"
As expected, Lin Wei felt that every word Zhao Ziheng said was like a sharp blade, cutting her true feelings for him. He neither asked her to wait nor asked her to stay by his side. He completely avoided the topic. Tears flowed silently, falling drop by drop on the back of Zhao Ziheng's warm hands that were holding hers tightly...
"Weier——"
It was so obvious that how could Zhao Ziheng not feel the pearl-sized tears dripping on the back of his hand? Although he had expected it, the damage Lin Wei suffered was far deeper and more painful than he had imagined...
That being the case.
"I don't know when I can come back, so I can't let you wait . It may be three months, or a year like before, or three years, or even ten years. If you want to restore peace to this turbulent world, you must be prepared to fight it for a long time. At this important time, I don't want to disturb myself because of other things. I want to quell this turmoil and catastrophe. This is the path I have chosen, so you don't have to abandon your happiness for me. You also have the right to choose-"
The gentle and low voice seemed gentle but was actually so cruel. Perhaps Lin Wei had known this from the beginning.
"Would you say the same thing if it was Shu'er?"
Lin Wei's shocking words made Zhao Ziheng stunned. Lin Wei raised her head and looked at him with tears in her eyes. With such an expression and such a look, Zhao Ziheng would of course think of Shu'er instead of Lin Wei...
As for Lin Wei, ever since Zhao Ziheng called her name in front of her three years ago, she knew that there was no room for anyone else in Zhao Ziheng's heart. She thought time would allow him to forget, but he was not only unable to forget, but he had never even forgotten. During the time she spent with him, Lin Wei personally realized that deep in Zhao Ziheng's heart there was still a place that she could not reach, and that place belonged to another woman, a woman he loved.
Ever since Lin Wei mentioned Shu'er's name, Zhao Ziheng's face showed a great deal of pain. He was staring at Lin Wei, but in his heart he was thinking about Shu'er. Not only was his Shu'er's life or death uncertain, but he couldn't be with her either. With so many mixed feelings, he mistook Lin Wei for her...
"Shu'er——"
Heartbroken and helpless, Zhao Ziheng mistook Lin Wei for Shu'er and hugged her tightly...
"I'm sorry that I can't be with you, but you must understand that I can't abandon the people of my country now. I believe you will forgive me. If possible, if we were still in that era, I think I would definitely be with you all the time, but fate has brought us here, and let us each bear a different fate. Even if we all want to give up, life is fragile and the people are innocent. Since I can do it, I want to fight for it. Shu'er, you must hope so too, right? That's why you chose to survive in pain when so many lives were threatened-"
He told everything that had accumulated in his heart since the separation, and forgot that the Shu'er in front of him was Lin Wei. He was thinking about Shu'er and loving Shu'er with all his heart. He wanted to be with her all the time and stay by her side all the time. However, the disordered fate took him away from his beloved. He had to face the cruel fact. He hated his current identity. If he was still just a policeman like in the present life, if he came here as a civilian, he could love the one he loved and live the life he wanted. Even if Shu'er was in a half-dead sleep, as the king of a country, he could not be with her and might never see her again. He still resolutely chose many lives. Who knows his sadness? Who can understand his pain?
She had no idea what happened to Zhao Ziheng, but she could still find the fact that he did not belong to her from his words. She was powerless to push him away or scold him, and could only cry silently with pain. Once she fell in love, even if she knew he did not belong to her, she still fell into it. Even though she was covered with scars and wounds, she had no one to complain to, and no one to resent, so she could only silently endure this relationship that she should not have fallen into...
