Chapter 10: No Deer in the Deep Forest Lu Shuang 02
Xia Xingfeng handled all the procedures for Su Xin from diagnosis to hospitalization. This was the first time I tried to rely on someone, and I suddenly felt that the burden on me was lighter.
It feels good, just like a traveler carrying a heavy load finally reaches an oasis in the desert and can finally put down the burden and have a good rest.
Su Xin had made arrangements, and Lu Lan also found a job in a restaurant during the winter vacation. After careful consideration, I decided to return to the newspaper.
Xia Xingfeng thought that I wanted to return to the newspaper because I still had feelings for Shen Yuxi, so when I told him my decision, he was a little disappointed.
I hesitated for a moment and added , "I returned to the newspaper only because I found that I really like this job as a reporter. There is no other reason."
Xia Xingfeng didn't seem to expect me to explain. He was stunned for a moment, then a smile spread across his lips: "Come on, fight for your dream, I support you."
"Thanks."
I am really grateful. Without him, I might still be stuck in the quagmire and unable to get out; without him, my world might still be shrouded in darkness and without sunlight.
He is like a gust of wind that blows away the clouds and allows me to see the sun.
Because of my good , the editor-in-chief happily agreed to my return. Since Shen Yuxi no longer took apprentices, I returned to Han Shao's group.
The days became busy again . Occasionally, Yu Nansheng would ask me to go out for a walk, and I would always take the opportunity to tell her about the newspaper. I could see that there was still hope in her eyes, but perhaps the shadow was too deep, and she could never muster up the courage to return to the newspaper.
January in S City was very cold. If you stood outside, the wind would cut you like a knife. Photographer Xiaoman and I became a regular partner. We often stood on the street holding a cup of hot water, stamping our feet while interviewing. Xiaoman was a freshly graduated student, and she had the same passion as Yu Nansheng. She held a camera like a gun in the hands of a cowboy, brave and handsome.
After finishing an interview mission, I received a call from Yu Nansheng asking me to go shopping.
I was silent for a while, then agreed: "Okay, it's too late today, I'll have a day off tomorrow."
Yu Nansheng sounded very happy: "Then it's settled." After a pause, she asked again, "How is reporter Shen doing recently?"
I smiled, thinking of Shen Yuxi's workaholic look, and after a moment I said, "He's getting busier and busier. I don't get to say a word to him all day."
Yu Nansheng fell silent on the other end of the phone.
I took the opportunity to add, "Since you want to know so much about his recent situation, why not come back and ask him yourself? I believe he hopes you can come back."
Yu Nansheng smiled bitterly on the other end of the phone: "I may not be able to go back. I no longer have the courage I had before."
"Coward," I concluded simply.
"You're right, I am indeed a coward, but I don't want anyone else to get hurt because of me." Yu Nansheng's voice was cold, with helplessness and sadness.
I knew that after all my persuasion she had no intention of coming back, there was no point in talking about it, so I said, "Okay, I understand. I'm going to take a taxi home now. I'm hanging up now. See you tomorrow."
Yu Nansheng responded "OK" on the other end of the phone.
When I was walking home from get off work, I passed by Shen Yuxi's seat and found a few cigarette butts scattered in the ashtray. In fact, he was not a smoker.
Before Yu Nansheng left the newspaper, I seldom saw him smoking, but after Yu Nansheng left, he started smoking more frequently.
He is also a person who likes to keep all his thoughts deep in his heart, and all his emotional changes can only be guessed through his actions.
However, I haven’t guessed his thoughts for a long time. When I still had a vague crush on him, guessing his thoughts was almost a must-do for me every day - I was worried that the manuscript was not well written and would not please him, that the questions listed in the interview outline were not profound enough and the perspective was not unique enough, and that one day he would think of me as a useless person and disappoint me.
This time when I came back, the only communication between him and I besides submitting manuscripts was that he casually said "welcome" to me on the day I returned to the newspaper.
These two short words made me feel relieved. They meant that he didn't mind my return and he wouldn't dwell on my confession at the celebration party.
This is the best ending for me.
