Chapter 9 Let loneliness surge into an ocean 03
Some dreams are true, some dreams are false.
When I opened my eyes and saw Fang Chongyan 's sudden change in expression, I understood. This dream was real.
When he saw me wake up, his eyes began to turn red with tears in them. The silence in the room made me feel a little scared for no reason.
I asked, “What about him?”
Fang Chongyan's eyes were flustered and confused, as if he wanted to escape from something. As soon as I finished speaking, his tears flowed uncontrollably. I sensed something and suddenly my face was full of tears.
I heard someone shouting my name, and the voice was getting closer and closer. I sat up suddenly, not daring to ignore the figure, and stared at the door.
Suddenly, the door opened.
It’s Lu Feng.
My throat seemed to be stuck by something. I stared at him intently. The hope in my heart emerged bit by bit, as if hope would exist forever if I didn't ask.
"Who can tell me where he is?"
"he died……"
The light in my eyes gradually died out with his words. I heard my heart slowly split open, warm blood spilling out from the cracks, erupting into a sea of blood.
In the center of the sea, Fang Xuyou was drowning.
I saw the sea water in front of me spreading little by little, covering my eyes, flowing into my throat, and filling my body. Inside my body, I felt like I was drowning.
He is in front of me, in my heart, and everything around me is him.
He said, help.
"Weiwei..." Someone called me in a low voice.
I can not hear.
"He was on your boat, and when it capsized he saw you fall into the sea, so he jumped overboard... He didn't come up to save you, and the lifeguards searched for him for a long time, and when they found him..." someone told me.
I can not hear.
I could only hear Fang Xuyou's voice and see Fang Xuyou.
He said, the sea water is so cold, Fang Weiyang, can you take me out?
He said, I'm going to die.
He said, goodbye...
Fang Xuyu, you hate me so much that you want to take revenge on me with your own life?
So cruel!
So desperate!
I held onto Fang Chongyan's hand tightly, holding my suffocating heart, and cried, "I haven't seen him yet, I haven't said I love him, I haven't apologized to him, how could he be dead?"
Fang Chongyan didn't say anything, he just hugged me and patted my shoulders. The glaring light stung my eyes and my tears, making it impossible for me to see anyone's face.
Fang Chongyan whispered: "Cry... it will be better if you cry..."
I twitched my lips, muttered incoherently, and my body trembled violently. At this moment, I hated my stupidity, hated myself for not looking for him earlier, and hated that I had let him down in this life.
The body is warm, but the heart is cold.
I opened my eyes and tears flowed from the corners of my eyes. I didn't know if there was something wrong with my body, but I couldn't stop the tears from flowing.
When I fell asleep, he was not in my dream; when I woke up, I was still in my dream. Whether it was a dream or reality, there was no Fang Sumo. He left without even looking at me.
I couldn't bear to see his body.
I heard that Fang Chongyan held a grand funeral for him; I heard that Zhong Maner also came to the funeral and she cried so hard that she fainted several times.
Fang Xuyu, you are very proud, right? Zhong Man'er still doesn't know that you are the one who did it to her. You ruined her, but she still loves you.
You have also destroyed my heart, what can I use to love you in the future?
Seven days later, Lu Feng took me to Fang Xuyu's tomb.
On the tombstone was the only photo of him smiling. I just realized that he could smile. His smile was like the spring breeze in March. I hugged his tombstone and cried as if I had lost the whole world.
When Zhong Maner saw me crying on the ground, she pointed at me and laughed, "Poor thing."
Yes, I am a poor creature.
"I told you not to compete with me. Look, you can't have him either." She rushed over and grabbed my hair, shouting, "Neither of us can have him! I didn't lose!"
She smiled like a winner, but her tears could not deceive herself.
"What are you doing!" Lu Feng rushed over and pushed her away.
"I have never lost!" Zhong Man'er stepped back, shouting with tears in her eyes and a smile.
Yes, we all lost.
Fang Xuyu died without leaving a word, so he is the biggest winner.
After returning from the cemetery, I couldn't sleep all night.
I haven't been to work for a long time, and Lao Fei is yelling that he wants to fire me. I turn off my phone, bury my head in the quilt, and go to work.
This year, it snowed heavily again.
Shen Huai asked me to go home for the New Year, saying that Nianxuan always missed me as her sister.
I remember the last time I saw her, she had just learned to walk, with small arms and legs, and she often fell after taking a few steps.
She didn't cry even after she fell, she just opened her arms to me and shouted "Sister, hug me". When I hugged Nianxuan, I always thought of my mother, and I felt a little warm.
The past is not as good as the present.
During the Chinese New Year, I really went back home.
I looked at Nianxuan in my arms, as if I was holding the hope of a new life. In the days to come, she will be my sustenance. I want to live well for Shen Huai and Nianxuan.
My love and friendship have become so old that only memories remain. Family affection is my only comfort.
I heard from the neighbors that Lin Jiaxuan had a big fight with a gangster over a girl. The girl died trying to save him during the fight, and the Lin family paid the family a sum of money. In order to atone for his sins, Lin Jiaxuan went to Tibet. It is said that Tibet is the closest place to heaven, where the soul can be forgiven and sins washed away.
After the Chinese New Year, during the Spring Festival, I was flipping through photo albums at home. My mother in the album had a beautiful smile, and Lin Jiaxuan in the album still looked young and innocent.
Flipping through those photos, I look back on those years that can never be returned.
The moment I closed the album, I received a text message from an unfamiliar number. I recognized .
There is only one simple line of words on it -
Xiao Weiyang, I'm back.
My tears fell. I hadn't cried for a long time. The moment I saw July's message, I cried again.
On the eighth day of the Lunar New Year, I left Flower City and returned to City C. I walked in the same neighborhood I had met in July. There were more stray cats. I took out the biscuits in my pocket, crushed them, and fed them. One cat came up and licked my finger. The other cats saw that there was no danger and surrounded me for food.
They finally trusted me, a stranger.
"Ah...ah...ah..." The homeless man stretched out his hand and pointed at me, babbling, as if he recognized me.
"Are you still here?" I asked him.
He was hunched over, smiling foolishly. He was wearing a red cotton jacket, which was still greasy but much cleaner than it had been a long time ago.
"I've always wanted to say thank you to you. I thought you were..." I smiled and saw that he had a few pieces of bread in his hand. I asked him, "Was it given by a kind person?"
His eyes moved rapidly, and suddenly he thrust one towards me, saying excitedly: "Ah, ah...ah..."
Seeing that I didn't react, he suddenly stuffed it into my hand. I realized that he wanted me to eat it.
I wanted to refuse, but when I saw him excitedly pointing at the bread and munching on it with anxiety in his eyes, I tore open the wrapping paper, took a bite, and my heart warmed up.
"It's delicious." I whimpered in a dry voice.
His world is simple and beautiful.
It turns out that he is not a "madman".
It's those of us who claim to be smart who are crazy.
