Chapter 9 But I like you, bastard! 3
Yao Duotao said in disbelief: "Oh my God! So 'Firefly Forest' is written by Xia Senshi...but he just said he wants to stop writing? This is too sudden, isn't it? He is so famous, why does he suddenly want to stop writing?"
The total time of Xia Senshi's live broadcast was no more than one minute, but the viewership had already reached over 100,000. Even after it ended , people were still wandering around in the live broadcast room, and the comments never stopped for a second.
This is really Xia Senshi's style. He decides to do something decisively and without leaving any room for maneuver. No matter what others say, he will not change his mind.
But...why did he have to give up comics at this time? Comics are the last connection between him and me!
Why would he suddenly say he wanted to stop writing, without even giving me the chance to look at his comics and imagine how he drew?
Oh my god... why does my heart hurt so much? Why? Could it be... is Xia Senshi so important to me? Am I in love with him?
The emotions in my heart gushed out like water from a burst pipe, reluctance, grievance, surprise, anger... they mixed together and made my heart pound.
I couldn't care about anything else. I quickly changed my clothes, smoothed my messy hair, picked up my phone and wallet, and rushed out.
Yao Duotao yelled behind me, "Hey! Where are you going in the middle of the day? Yan Dingding!"
"I'm going to go find Xia Sen. I don't care if he lets me go to Hanamachi Research Institute or not. Anyway, I can't stand it this time. I must go and ask him in person why he suddenly gave up comics!"
I quickly got into a taxi and found that the driver was the one who took me back from Hanamachi Research Institute that day.
When he saw me, he was startled: "Hey... little girl, are you okay this time? I just washed my car yesterday!"
Thinking of myself lying on the back seat that day, wiping my nose and tears, I felt a little embarrassed. But now I was so anxious that I had to urge him: "What a coincidence, uncle, it's me again. I will definitely not make your car dirty today, as long as you drive faster and let me get there faster..."
"Don't worry, little girl, it's absolutely fine!"
…
However, the fact is that half an hour later we were still stuck in traffic in the city center.
The uncle was sweating profusely and kept looking at me through the rearview mirror. He also comforted me: "Little girl, wait a minute. Once we get out of this intersection, I will definitely increase the speed. Don't fall down and cry again!"
I anxiously flipped through my phone, constantly refreshing the news about the announcement of the closure of "Firefly Forest". The news that popped up told me that all this was true and not my own crazy imagination.
Xia Senshi, didn't you say that drawing comics is too easy and you can draw anything you want? Then why don't you keep drawing? Why did you leave so suddenly? Do you really not want to leave me any thoughts? You are too heartless!
"I will definitely find out everything! Don't even think about running away!"
Finally, the road was cleared and the orange taxi was speeding along the road. The scenery outside the window slowly changed from densely packed high-rise buildings to low-rise buildings, and then to endless fields and grasslands.
Hanamachi Research Institute is at the end of this green meadow.
The first thing that caught my eye was the familiar little garden, which had a blue swimming pool and was surrounded by a garden of black lilies, which looked strange and gorgeous, like an eternal dream that would never wake up. Going further in, there was a slightly raised grassy area, and a tree that was not very tall but had a particularly large crown stood there.
I took a casual glance and saw two familiar figures under the big tree!
Who else could that giant lizard playing in the water beside the swimming pool be but Rouwan? And who else could that tall boy leisurely leaning against a tree trunk be but Xia Senshi?
It was really effortless, saving me the trouble of climbing over the wall to find him.
At this time, Xia Senshi was still sleeping on the lawn? No, no, no, he was not sleeping. There was a food box next to him, and he was throwing it around, as if he was feeding Meatball...
Shouldn't he be working hard in the lab right now? Asshole! Why is he so relaxed?
I patted the driver's shoulder anxiously and said, "Stop, stop, stop, uncle, no need to go any further, just stop here!"
The uncle braked suddenly and my head hit the back of the chair, which made me dizzy. I rolled down the window and shouted to Xia Senshi impatiently: "Xia Senshi, listen to me! Stay there and don't move. I will come to you!"
The uncle was frightened by my powerful roar. He smiled awkwardly and said, "Girl, is that your boyfriend? Are you here to have a fight with him?"
My face suddenly felt hot.
Xia Senshi stood up and walked a few steps towards me. I quickly leaned down, but I didn't know if he saw my red face.
Oh, I was too impulsive, Yan Dingding, what are you shouting for? You are so fierce, did the uncle misunderstand you?
The uncle looked at me with great interest: "This boy is really good-looking and has a good temperament. Little girl, you have to talk to him nicely and don't be so aggressive!"
I explained angrily: "No! We are not boyfriend and girlfriend!"
When I saw Xia Sen walking towards me leisurely and showing no intention of stopping, I got angry and said to him, "Didn't I tell you to stand there and don't move? I'll come over by myself!"
However, when I got off the bus, I realized that there was no money in my wallet!
No money? That’s embarrassing!
After I yelled at him, Xia Senshi stopped obediently at the garden gate and didn't move.
And I... don't have any money, so I can only borrow from Xia Senshi? This is too embarrassing...
I got off the car dejectedly, lowered my head, and moved step by step to Xia Senshi's side. I said in a weak voice: "Hey, Xia Senshi, lend me some money. I have no money in my wallet..."
He was wearing a light blue T-shirt and dark grey pants, his honey-blond hair gleaming in the sun. He chuckled barely audibly and handed me the money without saying a word.
I paid the money and walked back to him dejectedly, with all the arrogance I had just felt gone.
"Let's go sit on the lawn together. It's cool under the shade of the trees. Meatball is waiting for you there!"
I was very surprised to hear Xia Senshi speaking to me in a tone that couldn't be more normal. Shouldn't he be very annoyed with me now? After all, I had become a traitor in his eyes, so why would he lend me money and talk to me in a friendly way?
A lot of question marks suddenly popped up in my head, and I even forgot to ask him why he stopped writing. I just followed him stupidly.
Rouwan was playing with water happily, and when he saw me coming, he splashed water twice excitedly. Now my clothes were all wet.
I rushed over angrily, and Rouwan dived into the swimming pool with a look of fear on his face. I almost fell down, but fortunately Xia Senshi reached out and grabbed me.
His hands were warm, and he pulled me back to him. My back was pressed tightly against his chest, and he laughed happily above my head. I felt like this beautiful laughter had disappeared for a century, and now when I heard it again, my mood also improved a lot.
The resentment of being wronged, the grief of not being trusted, and the anger and reluctance when I heard that Xia Senshi was going to stop writing, all faded away, as if Xia Senshi and I had returned to the carefree days in the cottage by the sea, and we were the only ones left in the whole world.
The air suddenly became quiet. I don’t know why, but I had stabilized my body. However, Xia Senshi still didn’t let me go, and I didn’t struggle.
Both of our heartbeats quickened and merged into one.
Xia Senshi was the first to break the silence: "Yan Dingding, do you still remember that time when you and Rouwan rolled into the swimming pool together? That scene was so similar to now!"
His tone was full of nostalgia.
I reminded myself several times that he was just reminiscing and that it didn't mean anything else, but I couldn't help feeling happy.
Did Xia Senshi become happy because he saw me?
When did I start to regard Xia Senshi as not just a friend, but someone so important and someone I loved so much?
I figured this out in an instant, but I didn't dare to look up at Xia Senshi. After all, he probably just regarded me as a friend. The gap between us was so big...
I said bitterly, "Xia Senshi, why did you say you wanted to stop writing?"
He didn't answer immediately, but paused for a few seconds before speaking: "What do you think?"
A wave of disappointment surged in my heart. Although he did not answer my question, he indirectly confirmed the fact that he was going to stop writing. So, what else could it be?
"Is it because you decided to devote yourself to the research of Hanamachi Institute? Or is the director putting pressure on you again?" I shrugged disappointedly. "Any reason is important, more important than comics. What's so important about those who want to see your work?"
Xia Senshi's voice was very calm, as if it came from another dimension: "I don't care about those people at all. I started drawing comics just to relieve stress. What does it matter if I stop now?"
What does it matter? He asked me in such a cold tone.
I'm so angry, so angry! Doesn't this person realize my feelings at all?
I struggled to break free of Xia Senshi's hand that was around my shoulders and said, "You're going too far! Am I not one of those fans? Or, in your eyes, I am exactly the same as those fans you don't know, and you don't need to consider my feelings at all..."
When I said the last part, I didn’t know whether I was sad or angry. My trembling voice betrayed my inner unrest.
Xia Senshi approached me and held my shoulders with his hands. He leaned down slightly, looked into my eyes, and asked, "Then, Yan Dingding, why do I need to consider your feelings?"
This time, he only had eyes for me.
If I hadn't heard what he said, but only his calm yet gentle tone, I would have been intoxicated. But in fact, his words were like an icicle, piercing my chest.
I lowered my hands with a sad look on my face and stopped looking into his eyes. What else do I have to lose? Even if I reveal my true feelings to him, he will just smile indifferently...
"Because... Xia Senshi, I like you! From the first day I knew you, I was full of romantic longings. If I hadn't come to Hanamachi Research Institute and lived with you for so long, maybe I would have longed for you all my life. But I came, and I like you more and more... I like you so much that I am willing to give you the best of myself. If... If I hadn't met you, how great it would be! I would just go to the autograph session of 'Firefly Forest' every year, and like all ordinary fans, I would be so excited that I couldn't sleep after getting an autographed photo. How happy I would be then! But now..."
A teardrop fell into the soil and immediately disappeared. I wonder if a black lily will grow here next year?
Xia Senshi asked: "But what's going on now?"
I didn't answer.
He actually shook my shoulder a little anxiously and asked again: "How are you now?"
I smiled bitterly, thinking that he was really cruel. Did he really want me to finish speaking quickly so that he could drive me away?
My lips trembled, and finally I said with a trembling voice: "Now, I can no longer be an ordinary fan of yours. I like you so much, and I may never be able to forget you in this life. I..."
Xia Senshi suddenly pulled me into his arms.
I pressed my face against his hot chest, too shocked to speak.
His heartbeat was extremely fast, but his voice remained calm, with an unprecedented doting tone: "Silly Dingding, I know everything you said."
