Chapter 8 Our Song 1
The heartbeats written in the story are far less real than the ones you feel in person. Shen Muxi, do I make your heart beat? If I make your heart beat, come to my arms, and let's be together, okay?
——He Yue
When I was recuperating in the hospital, He Yue always prepared some nutritious food for me. It was then that I realized that He Yue’s cooking skills were actually very good.
Someone with such great cooking skills had to pretend that he knew nothing and asked me to cook. Looking back on it, I just want to laugh.
Li Chuan and Min You also came to see me. They both told me to have a good rest and to discuss other things after I got better.
Yes, everyone came to see me, except Sunai and Xiao Anning.
Thinking back to the past, if one of us three fell ill, the other two would stay with him/her day and night.
I was afraid of taking medicine because it was bitter, so Sunai always prepared candies for me. Xiao Anning gave half of my medicine to herself and took it with me.
I even joked that she shouldn't eat too much to harm her body. At that time, Xiao Anning patted her chest and said, "Now pathogens will run away when they see me!"
I laughed and came to my senses, and the ward was empty.
I don’t know what will happen to the three of us in the end, but I hope that no matter what happens in the future, we will never forget the good things we once had.
A few days later, I asked He Yue to pick me up from the hospital.
He Yue drove me back to Qingshui Bay and took care of me in every possible way.
I sat in the car, watching the scenery flash by outside the window, watching groups of girls walking by talking and laughing, and a group of children playing around.
He Yue turned his head from time to time and looked at me worriedly. I knew what he meant and shook my head and said, "I'm fine."
After returning to Qingshui Bay, He Yue asked me: "What do you want to eat? I'll make it for you."
"Anything."
I didn't have much of an appetite, so He Yue picked some lighter food and went to the kitchen to get busy.
I went back to the bedroom, closed the door, and sat in front of the desk in a daze. There was a photo frame on the desk, which contained a photo of me, Sunai, and Xiao Anning. The three girls in the photo had pretty faces and innocent smiles. It was taken after we took the college entrance examination, only three years ago.
My emotions were so complicated that I couldn't sort them out myself. I took the music book on the table and looked through the notes I had written.
They danced in front of my eyes like dancing elves. I sat there blankly with my vision blurred.
I sang the melody unconsciously.
I don’t know what kind of song it was. All I could think about was Sunai and Xiao Anning. I wanted them to come back and become the way they were before.
I don't blame Sunai, she can be with whoever she wants, and I don't blame Xiao Anning either, as long as she can protect herself well.
I don’t know how long I hummed, and finally, I lay on the table and cried silently.
He Yue stood outside the door, listening to my voice, his brows furrowed deeper and deeper.
After a while, he knocked on the door and asked me to eat.
I wiped away my tears, opened the door and went out.
"The meal is ready." He Yue said with a smile.
I nodded and followed him to eat.
At the dinner table, He Yue handed me a piece of paper with some melodies written on it.
I took it in surprise, looked at it, and realized that this was the song I had just hummed in the room.
He heard it all. He must be very worried.
"I'm sorry." I looked at He Yue with an apologetic face.
He Yue shook his head and said to me: "Don't say sorry to me."
"Thank you then." I waved the paper in my hand and said with a smile.
He Yue said gently: "Let's eat."
I nodded and continued eating.
After dinner, He Yue went to wash the dishes. I sat on the sofa, looking at the music score in my hand, thinking about how to write the lyrics.
He Yue finished washing the dishes and came over and sat next to me. I had other things to ask him, so I put the music score aside.
I asked him questions like I did before, leaning on the sofa and saying, "He Yue, if it were you, what would you do if you encountered a situation like mine?"
He Yue said truthfully: "I don't know, because I haven't encountered it, so I can't predict it. But Mu Xi, you have to know that we are in a situation now, arguing and stubborn because of ignorance, but one day, when we get out of the maze, we will know who is good and who is bad."
"Then will Suna and I still be together?" I leaned my head against the back of the sofa, and a few tears flowed from the corners of my eyes.
"Just wait until they get out of the maze." He Yue said earnestly.
I know, in fact I know everything.
Thank you, He Yue, because someone affirmed me, I had the courage to wait.
I leaned forward and rested my head on He Yue's shoulder. He didn't move and let me lean on him.
No matter what, they will be my friends, because I made friends with them voluntarily.
After I recover from my illness, I have to go back to school. The exams are coming soon and I still have a lot of things to do.
After returning to school, I didn’t meet Su Nai and Xiao An Ning, but met Qiao Xinyu first.
As soon as Qiao Xinyu saw me, he came over and asked me, "Muxi, why do you look so haggard? Are you feeling better? I went to the hospital to see you, but He Yue didn't let me in."
I didn't respond to his enthusiasm and said calmly, "I'm fine."
"I know everything, Muxi." Qiao Xinyu stopped me and said, "I'm sorry, I almost... I almost made you..."
I raised my head and asked, "Qiao Xinyu, is it interesting for you to tell me this now? We have no relationship now. If you really want to say sorry to me, please be nice to Sunai. She likes you so much." After saying that, I wanted to walk past him.
But before I could take a step, I stopped.
Not far behind Qiao Xinyu, Su Nai was standing there, looking at me with complicated eyes.
"Sunai." I called her, my tone unusually calm.
Sunai came over and said to Qiao Xinyu as if she didn't see me, "Ayu, where have you been? I've been looking for you for a long time."
She stood right next to me but didn't even look at me.
Qiao Xinyu didn't reply to her words. He walked around to me and said with concern: "Muxi, you don't look very well. Why don't you go back first and I'll ask for leave for you."
"Qiao Xinyu..." Su Naila stretched out the last syllable, turned around and looked at him, smiled with tears in her eyes, "Let's go back."
Qiao Xinyu didn't respond to her, nor did he look at her.
Su Nai endured for a long time, still looking at Qiao Xinyu with a smile on her face, and said, "Qiao Xinyu, I am your girlfriend."
"I've already told you that we're breaking up." Qiao Xinyu said in a cold voice.
Su Nai couldn't help laughing. She taunted, "Qiao Xinyu, you're amazing. Why didn't you reject me when you conspired with me to create a false situation to hurt Shen Muxi? Now that you're breaking up with me, do you think what happened before can be changed?"
"I was so stupid that I left Shen Muxi for you before." Qiao Xinyu said.
I was upset and couldn't listen any more, so I quickly stopped him and said, "Okay, don't bring me into your quarrel. Qiao Xinyu, I have nothing to do with you anymore. You two should handle your own affairs. I'm very tired."
After saying that, I strode away resolutely.
I really don't want to see them quarreling in front of so many people. Is it honorable to say such things? I don't understand why Sunai, who has a good temperament in the forest, would like Qiao Xinyu.
I couldn’t hold so many things in my mind, so I went back to Clearwater Bay early after class.
I spent three nights writing the lyrics for that song. There is nothing special about it, but it is all my true feelings. Some people will see love, some will see friendship, and some will see youth.
I borrowed He Yue's guitar and played and sang for him.
He Yue held my music score for a long time, then sighed and said, "Just use this."
I nodded, and then he took me to see Li Chuan.
When I was singing and playing the guitar, He Yue helped me record it. After listening to the song, Li Chuan thought about it for a long time and said to me: "Record this song and I will help you promote it unconditionally."
It seems easy to get such an opportunity, but when I think back on the past, I feel it was full of ups and downs.
I was not as excited as I had imagined. I nodded and said to Li Chuan, "Thank you."
He Yue saw that I still hadn't recovered from my emotions. When he sent me home, he asked me, "Shen Muxi, do you think people should be a little more selfish?"
I lowered my eyes and thought for a while, then said, "I think so."
He Yue said: "Yes, you should be a little selfish, so don't punish yourself because of what they do, think or think, even if they are your good friends. I have told you many times that they are not children anymore, and every choice they make is their own, and they should bear the corresponding consequences of their choices. You are destined to fight for your own future in the future, so don't have too many ties and obstacles to each other. You have to walk your own path, so why blame your fellow travelers?"
I smiled and said, "I know, don't worry. If they need me, I will run over immediately. If they don't need me, I will definitely do nothing and say nothing."
He Yue glanced at me, nodded and said, "The arrangement will be out in about five days. You will have to go to the recording studio to record songs in five days. During this time, you must maintain a happy mood and avoid eating foods that are bad for your throat. Forget it, give me all your time for these five days, and I will take you to relax."
When I heard that, I smiled and said, "Okay, where are we going?"
"Suzhou." He Yue said.
Lao She once said in "My Ideal Family" that "the best place for this family is in Beijing, the next best is Chengdu or Qingdao, and the worst is to live in Suzhou."
So Suzhou is a suitable place to live, and you won’t feel that much pressure when you go to Suzhou.
When He Yue said this to me in the car, I asked him with a smile: "Then let's travel to Beijing, Chengdu and Qingdao in the future and settle down wherever is good."
I was just joking and just trying to please him, but after hearing that, He Yue smiled and said, "As long as you are willing."
I sat in the passenger seat, and ripples began to form in my heart.
During the few days in Suzhou, He Yue took me around and arranged the time for entertainment and rest properly.
When I hung out with him alone, I found that He Yue was sometimes really like a child. I don’t care whether he was doing this to take my feelings into consideration, but I was very relieved to see He Yue like this.
We returned to Shanghai as scheduled, the arrangement has been completed, and I am ready to record the song.
I stood outside the recording studio, feeling nostalgic for the past, remembering the first time Sunai, Xiao Anning and I came here.
He Yue poured me a glass of water and asked me, "Are you ready?"
I nodded and told him not to worry.
Li Chuan, He Yue, Min You, and some staff were outside watching my performance. I turned around and walked to the corner and sent a text message to Sunai and Xiao Anning:
Nana, An Ning, I'm going to record a song, our song.
Then I put my phone down and went into the recording studio.
I held the lyrics and music I wrote in my hands, and I felt as if I were in another world.
Li Chuan made an OK gesture outside. I put on my monitoring headphones and listened to the melody of the accompaniment:
The original years
Never spared any moment
Like a desert turned into a dry spring
With a shoulder
A period of time
It turns out that it snows heavily
Never appreciate every kind of warmth
Like flying flowers turning into dust
Any posture
No one is spared
But we believe that innocence is enough to resist rumors
Youth is a time for kindness
But after the show
Who will clean up this wound for me?
Just because you suddenly walked so far away
If we don't know that the future will require us to face empty arguments
Have you come here once? Do you know how to turn things around?
But surrender to
Silence shuttles between you and me
Well, we'll be safe.
My entire mind is filled with Sunai and Xiao Anning, and occasionally Qiao Xinyu.
The strange thing is that when the melody came in, I seemed to forgive everyone, including Qiao Xinyu.
I recalled the scene when I met Sunai and Xiao Anning. It was June of the fourth grade. We were still ignorant little girls. One day after school, I was attracted by the fragrance of gardenia.
In the summer of that time, if a girl could wear a gardenia on her head, she would be beautiful all summer long.
I saw many gardenias planted in other people's homes. The flowers were big and white, and the fragrance was fragrant. I was only eight years old at that time. Although I remembered the teacher's advice that we could not pick the flowers planted, the gardenias were too attractive to me. I looked around and saw no one, so I secretly picked one and put it in my hair.
At this moment, a crisp voice sounded behind me. I looked over in shock. Xiao Anning, who was also only eight years old, was wearing a white dress and pointed at me and said, "The teacher said we can't pick flowers!"
I panicked and quickly explained: "I didn't pick the flowers, this is what my grandma bought for me when I got home from school!"
"You're lying. I just saw you picking the flowers here." Xiao Anning put his hands on his hips and tilted his head to look at me like a little messenger of justice. "You're not obedient. You picked the flowers planted by others. You have to apologize to them."
I looked at the somewhat Western-style building behind me and compromised, "But I don't dare to go alone."
Xiao Anning came over with a smile, took my hand and said, "I'll go with you."
So, Xiao Anning and I entered the building together.
The one who opened the door for us was Suna, who was dressed like a little princess.
I stammered and told her the reason for coming here, but Sunai didn't blame us. She even took us into her home and asked her mother to make flower tea for us. When we left, her mother gave Xiao Anning and me a gardenia each.
Later, we found out that we were in the same school. In junior high school, we were in the same class and our relationship grew better and better.
The first time I met Qiao Xinyu was when I reported to high school.
It was very hot at that time. My father took me to queue up for registration. Qiao Xinyu ran out from somewhere, saw that I was sweating profusely, and folded a paper fan for me.
He handed me the paper fan and ran away immediately. The only thing I can remember was the pair of white headphones hanging on his ears.
Later, because of my personality, I didn't dare to talk to him and could only observe him secretly. Meeting Qiao Xinyu is the most romantic and happiest thing I have ever experienced.
But now, all those beautiful things are gone.
No longer here.
With the arrival of the end of the accompaniment, the song is about to end.
A song is like a life, with the gradual birth and growth, the ups and downs of youth, the gradually stable daily life and the slowly sinking old age.
I am still on the road of youth and I don’t want it to end.
When the song ended, a tear rolled down my cheek.
I saw them all silent outside the soundproof glass, and finally raised their hands to applaud me. I didn't smile, didn't walk out immediately, and didn't jump up to give them a hug.
Everything is different from what I expected.
It's so sad that many fantasies and hopes cannot escape the reality.
I sighed, walked out and celebrated with them.
After the song was recorded, it was summer vacation. During the summer vacation, Li Chuan helped me push the song on music websites such as Baidu and Kugou, and the response was very good. From then on, everyone no longer knew "Yue Ren Ge" but the name "Shen Muxi".
When I went home during the summer vacation, my parents couldn't help praising me everywhere, which made me feel embarrassed and I just stayed at home.
In late August, my mother suddenly knocked on my bedroom door mysteriously and asked me, "Muxi, are you in love?"
I said in a daze: "Not yet."
My mother was very surprised and asked, "There's a young man coming to our house, and he said he's your boyfriend."
"What?" I jumped up from the sofa.
At this time, I heard my father's voice warmly welcoming guests in the living room.
I ran out in a hurry and said in surprise: "He Yue!"
Yes, that’s right, it was He Yue. He came to my house with some fruits, cigarettes and alcohol in his hands.
He Yue smiled at me and said, "Long time no see. You are much more casual at home than at my place."
I was stunned and quickly went back to the bedroom to comb my hair, change out of my pajamas, and then ran out.
He Yue and my father have started chatting.
"Why are you here?" I sat next to my father and asked He Yue opposite me.
He Yue said: "Li Chuan asked me to come to you and said he has something to discuss. Please pack your things and we will go back tonight."
"Oh, okay." I was still a little confused.
At this time, my mother stuck her head out of the kitchen and asked, "He Yue, are you leaving tonight? Have dinner first, and I'll make you something delicious."
He Yue smiled and replied, "Okay."
I'm a little overwhelmed by He Yue now.
I guess my parents are old, and they were so happy to see a pretty outstanding man coming to our house that they insisted on asking him to stay for a meal, asking about everything, including his family situation and his horoscope.
I finished my dinner in a depressed mood and left with He Yue. My mother was still telling me to be obedient, and to listen to He Yue.
"I don't see you usually listen to my dad." I muttered softly.
He Yue heard it, pinched me secretly, and then said goodbye to my parents.
On the way back in the car, I asked He Yue what Li Chuan wanted to talk to me about. He Yue said, "He wants to film your song."
I looked at He Yue in disbelief.
Did I hear it right? Li Chuan wants to film my song?
He Yue took me straight to Li Chuan's home. Li Chuan was lying by the floor-to-ceiling window, drinking coffee leisurely. Outside the window were the city lights and the starry sky at night.
He Yue and I sat on the bar stools next to us and watched Li Chuan pretending to taste his coffee.
"The effect is better than I expected, little girl." Li Chuan said softly.
I sat up straight and said seriously, "Mr. Li, my name is Shen Muxi."
