Chapter 8 Everyone has something on their mind 1
The sky is blue and the sun is shining.
The breeze rustled the leaves.
I sat in the comics club's activity room, my chin resting on my hands, staring out the window, my mind blank.
The huge activity room was quiet, without any sound.
Today is not the day for the comics club's activities, but I begged Bai Yaning to help open the activity room. I wanted to read comics here alone and adjust my mood which had fallen to the bottom.
According to the tutoring schedule, I should have gone to the Platinum Hall to do the test questions, but I couldn't erase the scene I saw that day from my mind. I could only curl up in the activity room of the comics club like an ostrich, deceiving myself and escaping from reality.
This was the first time I lied to Luo Zihan, and it was also the first time I used a lie as an excuse not to go to Platinum Hall for tutoring.
Yes, I am confused and at a loss. The scene I witnessed with my own eyes always hurts my heart like a sharp dagger. The more it hurts, the clearer it is, and the harder it is to forget.
Why did Shin Jung-yu appear in the Platinum Hall?
Why are Luo Zihan and Shen Jingyu still so close?
I was stunned at the time, not knowing how to face Luo Zihan, so I immediately ran to the study upstairs, carrying my schoolbag and unfinished test papers, and fled like a flash. Before leaving, I told the servants of the Platinum Hall that I had to leave first because of an emergency, and asked them to tell Luo Zihan.
Later, Luo Zihan called me and asked me why I suddenly left the Platinum Hall, but he didn't mention anything about him and Shen Jingyu meeting in the lounge. I felt even more wronged and a sense of helplessness surged in my heart.
Why?
CWhy did Luo Zihan meet Shen Jingyu without telling me?
Tears blurred my vision, and when I blinked my eyelashes slightly, the tears fell silently.
I raised my hand to wipe away my tears, took a deep breath, and stood up from the chair.
There are many comics on the bookshelf in the activity room, many of which are my favorite works, but I just can't muster the energy to read them now. Even my favorite comics can't eliminate the strong sense of loss in my heart.
I picked up a few comics and put them in my schoolbag, ready to take them back to the apartment to read. Turning around and closing the door of the activity room, I stood in the quiet and deserted corridor, looking at the blue sky, smiling bitterly and shaking my head.
Luo Zihan, I'm hurt, really hurt.
My heart always aches, and it hurts like I'm suffocating. There's no place to confide in, and no way to escape. Everything I do is just deceiving myself, and it's all in vain.
After leaving the campus, I came to a relatively quiet beach and sat on the sand reading comics.
Many times, I wanted to call Brother Minhe, even if I just cried to him on the phone, it would be like I found an outlet to vent my emotions.
However, I don't have that kind of courage, and I don't want to worry Brother Minhe who loves me. Or maybe Brother Minhe is right. If I fall in love with Luo Zihan, I will be destined to face the pressure from the two major families of Luo and Shen, and I will be destined to endure many times more pain than other lovers.
but……
All of this is my own choice, and I have to accept it. I have no regrets.
The humid sea breeze blew towards me, bringing with it a hint of coolness, blowing my school uniform and hair ends, and also raising a light dust, which lightly hit my cheeks, causing a slight pain.
I put the comic book next to me, slowly lay down on the beach, closed my eyes, and sighed. Yao Qianqian, Yao Qianqian, how did you become like this? You are so depressed and decadent, so melancholy and frustrated, it's not your personality at all! Instead of looking for trouble, why not take the initiative to find Luo Zihan and ask him about it like before.
Ah, that's strange.
Before I understood my feelings, no matter what doubts I encountered, I could ask Luo Zihan calmly and fearlessly. Now that we are in love and have a mutual understanding, I have become full of concerns, conflicted and entangled, and have lost my true nature.
If you care too much, you will be afraid to face the truth.
If you cherish too much, you will choose to escape from yourself.
Now, I finally understand how much I love Luo Zihan and how much I fear losing him. It turns out that I am not as strong as I thought...
The sea breeze gradually died down and the surroundings became even quieter.
I slowly opened my eyes, and in a trance, I saw Luo Zihan's heroic face.
Is this my hallucination? Did I close my eyes for too long and suddenly feel the sunlight shining on me?
I sat up suddenly and stretched out my hand tentatively, wanting to touch that unreal face. At this moment, a warm big hand gently covered my wrist, and pulled it forward with force, and the slender and strong arms hugged me tightly.
Our eyes met at a close distance, and I finally saw everything clearly.
Luo Zihan!
The person who appeared in front of me was really Luo Zihan! This was not an illusion, not a dream, Luo Zihan was by my side, as long as I raised my hand, I could touch him.
"You, why are you here?"
I looked up at him, my eyes burning with anger, and the grievances that I had tried so hard to suppress came flooding back up.
Luo Zihan frowned, held my face lovingly, and said helplessly, "Qianqian, I'm a little sad. How could you lie to me?"
"I……"
"No need to explain, I know there's a reason for it." Luo Zihan kissed my forehead lightly, his obsidian eyes looking deeply into my eyes, "Qianqian, who am I in your heart? You would rather hide in a corner and cry than see me. Am I so untrustworthy? That day, you suddenly left Platinum C Hall and didn't even want to say hello to me. I felt something was wrong. So, I secretly sent someone to follow you and keep an eye on your situation at all times, and your various behaviors made me sure of one thing. Qianqian, you saw Jingyu that day, saw me with her, and perhaps more coincidentally, you also saw her suddenly..."
"Yes, you guessed right." I shook my head in self-mockery, looking at him with a raised smile, a tear slowly sliding down from the corner of my eye, "Luo Zihan, I believe in you, and I really want to always believe in you. But, what can I do? My heart always hurts so much, I can't forget the scene I saw that day..."
Tears welled up in my eyes like a dam bursting. I raised my hand and wiped them across my face. Even though I looked miserable, I still had the most beautiful smile in my eyes when I looked at Luo Zihan.
"flourishing……"
Luo Zihan stared at me blankly, his dark eyes like deep pools without any gleam of life.
"Luo Zihan, you know that everyone has a small heart, and I, Yao Qianqian, am no exception. Here..."
I patted my chest and smiled at him with tears in my eyes, "There is only room for two people here. One more will be crowded, one less will be lonely. I would rather be alone forever than be so crowded that I can't breathe!"
"Qianqian, can you..."
"cannot!"
"Qianqian, listen to me..."
"No, that's not necessary."
"Yao Qianqian!"
Luo Zihan suddenly raised his voice, quickly lowered his head, and kissed me deeply.
I struggled desperately in his arms, pushing his chest hard with both hands, but the gentle touch on my lips was so familiar, so sweet, with care, love, and infinite affection... "Qianqian, I'm sorry." Luo Zihan let me go, raised his hand to rub my hair, and said in a deep voice, "Silly girl, I'm most afraid of letting you misunderstand and make you sad, so I want to explain it to you. In fact, the butler came to me about the venue for the Shen Group's promotional event. I didn't know Jingyu had followed."
I pouted and murmured, "No one is here anyway, so whatever you say is what it is."
"Qianqian, I don't care about others, I just hope you can believe me." Luo Zihan stared at me, with a sincere and expectant light in his eyes, "Qianqian, I didn't mean to hide what happened that day from you. Jingyu's arrival was a surprise to me, but it was also expected. She showed up at the Platinum Hall to plead for those seniors who bullied you, and also hoped to persuade me to change my mind and give up the relationship between you and her with the support of the elders at home."
"So, Master Luo, how did you handle it?" I raised my chin deliberately and glared at Luo Zihan angrily. "A beautiful woman took the initiative to throw herself into your arms, and you took it for granted to accept her kiss?"
Whenever I think back to that scene, my heartache grows worse, as if I were being bitten by millions of ants.
Luo Zihan sighed quietly, his beautiful face cooled a little, but his deep eyes were still firm, like the cold and quiet moonlight, clear and dazzling.
"Qianqian, I don't want to make excuses for myself, and I don't want you to misunderstand that there is someone else in my heart. You are not mistaken, Jingyu did that day... and I, I didn't expect her to do that, I was completely shocked. But after I reacted, I immediately pushed her away. Qianqian, if you don't believe me and think these are just excuses for myself, then you can punish me however you want."
"Really?"
Luo Zihan nodded solemnly: "Yes, but you must not leave me! Qianqian, my heart is also very small, it can only accommodate you. I have been lonely for so long, I really want someone to accompany me, are you willing to stay by my side forever?"
"Humph! We'll see how you perform in the future."
"Silly girl, thank you..." Luo Zihan hugged me tightly, buried his head in my long hair, and whispered, "I'm really sorry about what happened this time. I'm sorry, Qianqian. I will make it clear to my family and will no longer meet Jingyu, so as not to make you waver or worry in the slightest. I'm sorry, I obviously care about your relationship with Cui Minhe, and I obviously understand the tension and uneasiness, but I didn't consider your feelings and made you so sad..."
I raised my head slightly, turned my face to the side, and bit the corner of Luo Zihan's mouth hard. Only when I saw his handsome face twisted in pain did I let him go.
"Hmph! Does it hurt?"
C He just smiled without saying a word, caressing my cheek with his fingertips, his eyes more gentle than ever before.
What is this? Is he trying to win my sympathy or to make me feel guilty? I won't be soft-hearted. He made the mistake first and made me suffer for several days!
"Luo Zihan, you... cough cough, this is my punishment for you!" I looked at the teeth marks on his mouth, with faint traces of blood, and couldn't help but blame myself for using too much force. "Um, does it hurt? It seems like the bite was very deep, will it bleed? Luo Zihan, move the corner of your mouth and see..."
"It's okay. This little pain is nothing compared to your heartache." He pursed his lips and chuckled, kissing my forehead. "It's my negligence, my fault, that made you sad for so long. My Qianqian is the kindest, and I don't want to hurt her. It's great to be able to fall in love with Qianqian."
"Luo Zihan, don't think that if you say something nice, I will..."
The ringing of my cell phone interrupted me at an inopportune moment, and an unfamiliar caller number flashed on the blue screen.
Huh? I have no idea who this number is. Who is it?
"Hello, hello! Wha, what? Um, okay, thank you... Don't worry, I will do my best... I am also very happy to meet you. Okay, goodbye!"
Good news, great news!
The call was from the editor of the magazine. My comic work was selected and will be serialized in the weekly comic book soon. The editor also encouraged me to continue with the following creations, and they are looking forward to it very much.
"Luo Zihan, will you be happy for me?"
"Of course." He took my schoolbag and held my hand tightly, the smile on his lips deepening. "Let's go, let's celebrate properly, eat, go shopping, watch a movie, look at the stars... I hope my Qianqian will forget all her troubles and live happily like this every day."
I raised my eyebrows and smiled at him, blinking my eyes: "I heard that someone doesn't like comics very much, and regards them as meaningless cultural garbage. Oh, what should I do? I just happen to like those meaningless things..."
"You, are you deliberately making fun of me?" Luo Zihan pinched the tip of my nose and sighed helplessly, "I can't guarantee other people's works, but I will definitely read your comics. Is that okay?"
"Eh? Was that a stretch?"
"No, I love the whole house."
"Then..." I smiled mysteriously, took his arm, and whispered, "Luo Zihan, please promise me that you will get along well with Brother Minhe in the future, okay?"
Luo Zihan frowned slightly, and his deep and bright eyes dimmed a little.
"Qianqian, I am willing to love my cousin for your sake. He is your cousin, and I will respect him with normal etiquette. However, I cannot give in to his hiring my sister as his agent!"
Huh? He, he already knew?
I stared at Luo Zihan intently and asked with a guilty conscience: "When did you..."
"Accident?" Luo Zihan sighed, his smile seemed forced. "Maybe I'm too sensitive. I'll notice any abnormal behavior from my family, friends, and loved ones. My sister suddenly applied for early graduation, which aroused my suspicion. After sending someone to investigate, I found out that she became Choi Min Hyuk's assistant. Many times, I wanted to talk to my sister, but I still hoped that she would tell me the inside story. So, I've been waiting, waiting for her to explain it to me, but now I've changed my mind."
