Chapter 78: Fear
Gu Yun had actually seen the Wuergu attack, but he was kept in the dark at that time. Chang Geng's condition happened to be not that serious, so he mistook it for a case of demonic possession. He had never seen such a scene before.
Chang Geng curled up into a ball, his muscles tensed and hard as iron. After a while, he began to tremble violently, as if he was enduring great pain. Moreover, his strength was so amazing that Gu Yun was unable to hold him down.
Chang Geng shook off his hand violently, and his ten fingers were like eagle claws, grabbing at himself fiercely. Gu Yun certainly couldn't watch him hurt himself, so he stretched out his hand to block his arm and shouted, "Chang Geng!"
His voice seemed to bring a ray of clarity to Chang Geng, but it only made him pause for a moment.
The gas lamp hanging on the bedside that broke down at the critical moment made a "creaking" sound for a while, and finally slowly came on again with a breath. The light was dim and unstable, flickering and illuminating Chang Geng's bloodshot eyes.
Gu Yun was shocked - he saw that Chang Geng's face and lips were pale, as if all the blood in his body was shrouded in his eyes, and double pupils were faintly visible in his originally normal eyes.
It really looks like a legendary evil god.
When Gu Yun heard about "Urgu" from Miss Chen, he only felt distressed. He didn't really believe some of the unbelievable things. Until this moment, a chill slowly climbed up his spine. Chang Geng's eyes, which were neither sad nor happy but full of blood, actually made this battle-hardened general suddenly feel cold all over.
Their eyes met, and Gu Yun suddenly had the illusion of encountering a wild beast in the wilderness. He did not dare to look away for a moment, and slowly spread out his empty hand, tentatively reaching out to Chang Geng. Chang Geng did not dodge, and even when the warm palm touched the side of his face, he slightly lowered his head and rubbed Gu Yun's hand with an indifferent expression.
Gu Yun asked in a low voice with fear: "Do you still know who I am?"
Chang Geng lowered his eyelashes, which were thicker than those of ordinary people in the Central Plains, and called out softly: "...Zi Xi."
As long as I can still recognize someone, Gu Yun didn't notice the strangeness in his tone and breathed a sigh of relief first, but he was relieved too early. Before he could breathe a sigh of relief, Chang Geng suddenly stretched out a hand and grabbed his neck: "You are not allowed to leave!"
Gu Yun: “…”
The throat is a vital part of the human body. Gu Yun instinctively leaned back and held the cold hand. Chang Geng took advantage of the situation and grabbed his wrist, pushing it down fiercely. Gu Yun had no choice but to bend his fingers and hit the numb tendons between his elbows. In the extremely narrow space, the two exchanged several moves. The madman was already a master of martial arts. At this time, he was as powerful as an evil spirit and rushed around. Gu Yun was afraid of hurting him by accident. He was sweating and angrily cursed: "I just got back, where am I going?"
Chang Geng paused for a moment, and Gu Yun's hand on his neck stopped moving. He slapped him lightly on the chin with the back of his hand: "Wake up!"
This light tap might not be strong enough, not only did it fail to wake him up, but Chang Geng's eyes, which seemed to be dripping with blood, suddenly narrowed, like an enraged leopard, turned around and bit him, biting Gu Yun's arm.
Gu Yun: “…”
If I had known this, I would have slapped him!
Gu Yun let out a light "hiss" and his eyes twitched fiercely. He had been chopped and exploded in his life, but this was the first time he had been bitten by someone who wanted to eat him alive. He really wanted to swing his arm to knock out a few of the madman's front teeth.
However, his arms were stiff for a long time, and he finally couldn't do it. After a while, Gu Yun slowly relaxed the muscles in his arms, pinched the back of Chang Geng's neck from time to time, and whispered while taking a breath, "Skinning, pulling out the tendons and eating the meat - how big a grudge do we have? Do you hate me that much?"
This touched a nerve in Chang Geng. He blinked slightly, and then two lines of tears fell without warning.
Chang Geng did not say anything, but held Gu Yun's arm while silently shedding tears. The tears seemed to dilute the terrible blood in his eyes. After a long time, Chang Geng's teeth loosened slightly. Gu Yun tentatively pulled out his bloody arm, took a look, and cursed: "You bastard."
But despite scolding him, he still held him in his arms, wiped away the tears from the corners of Chang Geng's eyes, and patted his back from time to time.
Chang Geng lay on his chest for nearly half an hour before he gradually regained consciousness from the chaos. He looked like he had just woken up from a big dream. He was dazed for a while before those messy memories gradually came back to him.
Chang Geng's hair stood on end when he recalled what he had just done. He was originally a mess, but he suddenly froze. Gu Yun knew that he had recovered.
"Awake?" Gu Yun pretended to be calm and lifted his shoulders. He slightly stretched his stiff shoulders and stretched out his hand to ask, "What time is it?"
Chang Geng was so confused that he didn't dare to look at him. He lowered his head to see Gu Yun's arm, which was already covered with scabs. His face became even uglier. He held up his hands, his lips trembled, and he couldn't speak.
"Well, it was bitten by a dog." Gu Yun glanced at it indifferently, and then said, "The dog's teeth are quite straight."
Chang Geng staggered to his feet, found some fine silk cloth and clean water, and lowered his head to wipe his wounds. He looked as if he had just been ravaged, with none of his souls at home, looking extremely miserable.
However, for a man like Gu Yun who was born with an overprotective desire, if we ignore the feelings and just talk about what he saw with his eyes, "vulnerability" is probably what can move him the most, and beauty is secondary. His eyes softened at that moment, and he raised his hand, put his five fingers together, and gently tidied up Chang Geng's messy hair.
"Last autumn, Ji Ping and I traveled to the Central Plains and encountered a group of bandits who were looting in the name of 'uprising'," Gu Yun said slowly in a tone that was even softer than his movements. "We teamed up with Mr. Cai to deal with this group of troublemakers and captured the leader of the bandits. The bandit leader called himself 'Fire Dragon'. He had scars all over his body and had been burned by fire. During the interrogation, we found a barbarian woman's knife on him... It belonged to Huger."
Chang Geng's hand trembled violently, and the thin silk in his hand fell down. He lowered his head to pick it up with a wooden expression, but Gu Yun grabbed his hand.
Gu Yun: "Can you remember it when you were so young?"
Chang Geng's hands were as cold as a dead person's.
Gu Yun sighed: "Actually, Miss Chen told me everything, about that..."
Chang Geng interrupted him: "Stop talking."
Gu Yun kept silent obediently and watched him silently from the side.
Chang Geng sat there stiffly for a moment, then his hands suddenly became more agile, quickly taking care of the bite, then suddenly stood up, turned his back to Gu Yun and said, "It's been several years since Prince Yan's Mansion was built, and no one has been taking care of it. This is not right. I... I will go back to the Military Affairs Office at dawn, and move in after I'm done with this period..."
Gu Yun's face darkened.
Chang Geng stopped talking at this point. He couldn't help but think of the time when he went to the northwest to reward the troops at the end of the year, and Gu Yun's attitude that made him feel flattered - so he just knew the truth about Wuergu? He just felt sorry for him?
It seemed unreasonable that Chang Geng could show his old scars in front of Li Feng without restraint, but he didn't even want to let Gu Yun see any clues. He thought he had covered it tightly, but the wind still leaked out from between his fingers. Chang Geng clenched his teeth tightly, and he could still feel the blood in his mouth from when he went crazy just now.
Fishy and sweet.
Ever since he received the report that Gu Yun was going to return to Beijing to report on his work, he had been looking forward to it day and night, and every moment seemed to be a waste of time. However, when he finally saw the person, Chang Geng wished he could escape from Gu Yun's sight immediately.
His mind was in a mess and he subconsciously wanted to escape, so he turned around and walked out.
Gu Yun: "Stop, where are you going?"
Chang Geng was in a daze and ignored him.
Gu Yun suddenly shouted in a low voice: "Li Min!"
From childhood to adulthood, Gu Yun had rarely said harsh words to him, and it was even rarer for him to get angry. However, he had always been the one who had the final say in the army, and his authority was extremely high. This slightly angry shout, with a hint of murderous force, made Chang Geng shudder and instinctively stop.
Gu Yun sat on the bed with a gloomy face: "Get back here."
Chang Geng said blankly: "I..."
"If you walk out of this door today," Gu Yun said coldly, "I will break your legs, and the emperor can't save you. Come back, don't make me say it for the third time!"
Chang Geng: “…”
This was the first person who dared to break Prince Yan's legs to his face after he took charge of the Military Affairs Council. Chang Geng was stunned by his sudden temper and didn't dare to walk out for a moment. He mustered up the courage to look back at Gu Yun, and all the grievances and pains in his heart that were difficult to express surged up from his chest.
...But there are still traces of tears on my face. I am too awake to cry anymore.
Gu Yun couldn't stand his gaze, so he had to compromise and stood up and walked forward, hugged Chang Geng from behind, half-forced him to lie on the bed, and pulled the already cold quilt over him: "Why didn't you tell me all these years?"
Chang Geng took a deep breath and whispered, "...afraid."
What are you afraid of?
Gu Yun was slightly stunned, then he lifted Chang Geng's face with one hand: "Who are you afraid of? Me?"
Chang Geng looked at him deeply, and this look made Gu Yun understand what "love breeds fear" meant.
Gu Yun wanted to ask, "What are you afraid of me for? Are you afraid that I dislike you? Suspicious of you?", but he swallowed the words back. He had nothing to say for a moment, so he just took action, grabbed Chang Geng's collar, and kissed him fiercely. Chang Geng's breathing suddenly became heavy.
Gu Yun placed his hand on his ear and raised his eyebrows: "Are you still afraid now?"
Chang Geng: “…”
Gu Yun looked down at him, his heart suddenly warmed up, and he licked his lips. He decided to play the hooligan to the end, and raised his hand to reach for Chang Geng's messy collar.
Unexpectedly, at this moment, there were a few knocks on the door, and a poor fellow named Huo shouted indiscriminately, "Your Highness, it's almost time to prepare for court. Do you want to change your clothes?"
Gu Yun: “…”
It turned out that after all this trouble, daybreak had already arrived.
Huo Dan knocked on the door, but no one answered. He thought Chang Geng was too tired to hear him, so he was about to knock again when the door suddenly opened from the inside. Commander Huo was startled when he saw the person coming and exclaimed in shock, "My Lord, My Lord!"
When did Gu Shuai, who was behaving more and more strangely in private, come back? How did he get in without alarming any of the family guards?
Wall jumping?!
Chang Geng in the room was a little embarrassed. While tidying up his miserable appearance, he replied: "I will..."
Gu Yun interrupted without further ado, "Go and ask the prince for sick leave. He won't be going today."
Huo Dan was surprised and asked hurriedly, "Then...should we call the imperial physician?"
"Imperial physician? Imperial physicians are all good-for-nothings." Gu Yun said this unhappily, turned around and walked in, ordering, "Don't bother me if there's nothing wrong, go away."
Huo Dan: “…”
Chang Geng, who was under house arrest, looked helplessly at Gu Yun who acted on his own initiative: "I'm not sick."
"You're not sick, am I?" Gu Yun took out a handful of calming incense and put it on the incense table at the side and lit it. At this point, there was no need to hide anything. "This is what Miss Chen asked me to bring back for you."
A refreshing fragrance filled the room. Chang Geng sniffed it gently and asked, "Miss Chen changed the recipe?"
Gu Yun rubbed the teeth marks on his arm: "I specialize in treating those crazy people who bite people."
The calming incense took effect quickly, filling the lungs, making people feel lazy and unable to muster any strength or anger. Chang Geng leaned against the bed exhausted, staring blankly at Gu Yun. He looked haggard, his hair was disheveled, and his confused eyes kept chasing after him. He looked a little sick, and he didn't look like a man of steel at all.
Chang Geng murmured, "Zi Xi, can I hug you?"
Gu Yun thought to himself: "How disgusting."
Then she walked over and sat next to him, allowing him to come closer and put his arms around her waist.
"Call for sick leave." After a long while, Gu Yun suddenly said, "Don't we already have the Military Affairs Council? Jiang Hanshi is capable, but he just lacked some opportunities in the past. This time he was unexpectedly promoted, and he will surely be able to show his skills. The purple gold tribute from the Western Regions has almost arrived in Beijing, and we can rest and recuperate for a year or two. The barbarians are not engaged in production, so we can afford to delay, but Calais Yinghuo cannot. The war situation in the north will definitely change over time, and only Jiangnan will be left... After all, the foreigners have come thousands of miles across the sea, and the cost is huge. Even a powerful dragon cannot defeat a local snake, so we must have an advantage over them, right?"
Chang Geng lay in his arms, slightly opening his eyes, feeling Gu Yun's calloused fingers unconsciously moving between his head and neck, making his scalp itchy and numb.
"The civil service reform has just begun," Gu Yun whispered, "Although this matter was initiated by you, I don't think the officials have made much of a splash, and they basically all acquiesce. If you withdraw now, then the credit and blame will all be on others. If we don't fight for the credit, we may not be left behind... Forget about those things, go home and rest for a few years, okay?"
Shen Yi had a lot to say, but only the sentence "How will it end in the future" caught Gu Yun's attention.
The Gu family has been marquisates for generations and are royal relatives. He has seen the rise and fall of the powerful and wealthy, and the ups and downs in the officialdom. He also knows the fate of powerful ministers and generals. Even if he is a descendant of a royal family, can he avoid the reckoning of those in power and the Spring and Autumn Pen if he is too popular?
"I can't retreat," Chang Geng whispered after a while, "The first cut of the civil service reform has already been made, which is equivalent to scraping the bones to cure the poison. The skin and flesh have been cut open... If we retreat now, will we let him stay with the skin torn open, or will we have to sew it up again?"
The reform of civil service is only the first step. If we only regard it as a means to promote beacon tickets and stop at this step, after the war... or even before the war, there will be a situation in the court where everyone will scramble for beacon tickets. By then, not only will corruption become rampant, but if there is no wise person to supervise it, the beacon tickets will probably end up being worthless, and Daliang will probably die faster.
Gu Yun's hand tightened around his, and when Chang Geng opened his eyes again, the blood color and double pupils in his eyes had completely faded. He suddenly turned over and somewhat clumsily pressed the person he had been thinking about day and night onto the soft and thin quilt: "Zi Xi, do you know what Wuergu is?"
Gu Yun was slightly stunned.
"Urugu is an evil god and the most ancient curse of the barbarians. When their entire tribe is destroyed, they will leave behind a pair of children who will be trained to become Urugu. The person trained in this way will have unparalleled power and will surely bring about bloodshed and even the greatest enemy will be put to death." Chang Geng leaned over him, his chest trembling slightly as he spoke, and his voice was as gentle as before, but with a little indescribable hoarseness. "Before Huger died, he said to me, 'Throughout my life, my heart has only hatred, tyranny, and suspicion. I must be tyrannical and bloodthirsty. Wherever I go, there will be bloodshed and I am destined to drag everyone down with me. No one loves me, and no one treats me sincerely.'"
Gu Yun took a deep breath. He always felt that Chang Geng had too many thoughts when he was young, which were full of twists and turns that made people confused. However, he didn't know that behind the countless twists and turns, there was such a heart-piercing sentence.
"But there are people who love me, and there are people who treat me sincerely... Is that right? You were the one who called me back just now." Chang Geng whispered, "She has never given me warmth for a single day, and I will never do what she wants. Do you believe me? Zixi, as long as you say one word, I can go through mountains of swords and seas of fire."