The day after being "robbed" by those thugs, I saw Zhou Shiyun in the school garden. She was walking towards me from a distance. I have to admit that she is a beauty, with a slim figure and a graceful walk. I stood quietly on the road she must pass, waiting for her to "fall into the trap".
When we reached the edge of the small garden, she also noticed me. Her expression froze, and then she turned and walked away very quickly, not caring about her previous grace and image. Looking at her, I felt that the words "fleeing in panic" were very suitable for her.
In fact, I had no intention of settling the score with her. I admitted that she was my friend in front of a few thugs because she was still in my heart. Even though she was pestering Su Yunjin, deep down I always felt that she was not a bad person, so I still wanted to help her. But now it seems that I really overestimated Zhou Shiyun.
For many days afterwards, the relationship between Zhou Shiyun and I was like cat and mouse. She would hide far away from me, and even when she saw me, she would lower her head like a child who had done something wrong, and then she would quickly run away, and also quickly escape from my circle of friends. Many times, watching her leaving, I silently told myself that she could no longer be considered my friend.
However, Zhou Shiyun's avoidance of me also indirectly benefited me, because I was close to Su Yunjin and Su Mo, and in order to avoid the embarrassment of seeing me, she stopped bothering Su Yunjin.
Without Zhou Shiyun by Su Yunjin's side, I felt much better. Although he was still lukewarm towards me, and always looked distant yet gentle, I believed that as long as I persisted, he would definitely belong to me.
However, Su Mo, who had been trying to bring Su Yunjin and me together, did not take any action during Zhou Shiyun's silence, and because of her depression, I had to shift my attention from Su Yunjin to her.
Ever since she was beaten that day, Su Mo has been unhappy. She has lost interest in doing anything and often gets distracted when studying with me.
"Momo, have you lost your heart…" Looking at Su Mo's dazed look, I couldn't help but sigh.
Su Mo smiled bitterly, looked at me and said, "My heart is still here, but there is someone else living in my heart."
After that, Su Mo was distracted again. Seeing her sad for Zhuang Yi, I couldn't even say a word to comfort her. Deep and devoted love, these are originally beautiful words, but why do they become synonymous with pain when it comes to us?
I don't want Su Mo to suffer the same torment as me, and I don't want Su Mo and Zhuang Yi to be together, so all I can do is introduce some of the more outstanding boys around me to Su Mo.
So, Su Mo and I spent most of our time eating, but Momo didn't chat happily with my friends like before. Most of the time, we were talking together while she continued to be sad alone in the corner.
I introduced almost all the good boys around me to Su Mo, but Su Mo didn't change at all until she took the initiative to talk to me after a meal.
I thought she finally fell in love with the boy I introduced to her, but I didn't expect that all my efforts would go to waste as soon as she opened her mouth.
"Xiao Di, you don't have to worry about it anymore. In my heart, Zhuang Yi is the best and irreplaceable." Su Mo's expression was firm when she spoke, making it impossible for me to say no.
"But Momo, he already has a girlfriend, no, a fiancée..." I still said this fact with difficulty. Although I know that nothing I say can change Su Mo's mind, but as a good friend, I think it is necessary to remind her.
Su Mo looked at me with a smile and said seriously: "Zhuang Yi deserves a better girl. Lin Luofei is not worthy of him."
Su Mo said this a long time ago, but I didn't expect that this idea has taken root in her heart after these days.
Thinking of what Bao Kangqi said to me, I couldn't help but say to Su Mo: "Have you forgotten what happened that day? The wound on the corner of your mouth has just healed. Do you want to continue to be beaten or do you want to be disfigured?"
Su Mo and I both knew that if she didn't let go, what happened that day would happen again, and Lin Luofei would definitely not just let it go with a slap in the face.
Su Mo looked at me and said seriously: "Xiao Di, I have decided to sign up for a Taekwondo training class. If she dares to come again, I will let her see how powerful I am." While speaking, Su Mo also performed two Taekwondo moves.
I looked at her determined look, and my worry grew even more.
I thought Su Mo was just learning Taekwondo on a whim, but I didn't expect her to stick with it and go to study every night. On the way home, she would call me excitedly to tell me that she had learned a few more moves and that she would become stronger and stronger, and that she would not be bullied in the future, and would also be able to protect the people around her.
During this period, I met Su Mo several times. Seeing her excitement and her shy face when she told me about Zhuang Yi, I felt even more ominous. I always felt that Zhuang Yi might hurt Su Mo.
But I still couldn't say any words of comfort. I could only support her and keep encouraging her to move towards love.
The light in Su Mo's eyes reminded me of two words: lonely courage.
In Su Mo's love, even Zhuang Yi didn't respond, she was willing to work hard. Su Mo was like a sculptor, using her own body as a mold, carving flesh and bones, just to make herself the right person, just to stand by Zhuang Yi's side.
But when I think of Zhuang Yi, who speaks in a sarcastic way and acts frivolously, I feel sorry for Su Mo.
Love is a matter between two people, a third person will never understand it.
However, a third person often plays a role in promoting or hindering their love. As Su Mo’s good friend, she chose me to be the matchmaker of their relationship.
"Xiao Di, please ask Bao Kangqi to come out for dinner together, please." Su Mo's face was full of pleading, with a longing light flashing in her eyes.
"Momo, I..."
As my good friend, Su Mo obviously knows what I am thinking. The person I like is Su Yunjin. For Su Yunjin, I can't wait to draw a clear line between myself and Bao Kangqi.
Even if I didn't provoke him, I would be covered in blood. How could I dare to take the initiative to ask him out? I don't like him and don't want to have anything to do with him again, and Su Mo should also be clear about this.
"Su Mo, Bao Kangqi and I..." I looked at Su Mo in embarrassment, hoping that she would change her mind. If someone else had made such a request, I could have refused with confidence, but Su Mo, who had always helped me with my pursuit of Su Yunjin, now asked me to help her fulfill her love, I could not refuse, but...
"Xiao Di, just this time. It won't happen again." Su Mo grabbed my hand and looked at me pleadingly.
I closed my eyes and dared not look at her. I was afraid that if I saw her begging look, I would become soft-hearted.
"Xiao Di, I will explain everything to my brother, please." Su Mo understood me well, and seeing that I didn't dare to look at her, she continued to beg me, eliminating my worries.
I couldn't help but sigh and told her very seriously: "This won't happen again."
Su Mo nodded happily, and then kept saying that I was the best and that I was a very loyal friend. I smiled and tried to suppress the worry in my heart. I didn't even know whether I was helping Su Mo or hurting her by doing this.
Seeing that I agreed, Su Mo couldn't wait to help me take out my phone and signaled me to call Bao Kangqi. Seeing her anxious look, I sighed and picked up the phone.
Bao Kangqi was obviously excited when he received my call. Before I could say anything, Bao Kangqi on the other end of the phone asked, "Xiao Di, what do you want to talk to me about? Tell me quickly."
"I want to... invite you to dinner." As soon as I said this, Bao Kangqi on the other end of the phone excitedly said "OK" and asked me where and when to eat.
I was about to answer when Su Mo grabbed my hand and silently said the words "Zhuang Yi".
"Bring your good friends to Yuelai Restaurant at noon today." I hung up the phone right after I said that, because Bao Kangqi's excitement and excitement on the other end of the phone were hard for me to handle, and I couldn't handle Su Mo's nervousness on this end of the phone either.
"Will Zhuang Yi come?" Su Mo asked anxiously when she saw me hang up the phone.
"I don't know. Bao Kangqi said he would call him, but I'm not sure whether he will come or not." I told the nervous Su Mo frankly, and the hand that Su Mo held on to me suddenly felt cold.
"He should come. I have told Bao Kangqi to call Zhuang Yi. If he doesn't come, I will ignore Bao Kangqi." I comforted Su Mo softly, but the coldness in Su Mo's hands never dissipated.
While waiting for Bao Kangqi and Zhuang Yi at Yue Lai Restaurant , Su Mo was always worried that Zhuang Yi would not come. She even asked me to send a text message to Bao Kangqi, asking him if Zhuang Yi was on the way with him. She was relieved when Bao Kangqi confirmed the answer. But just as she was relieved, she started to worry about whether her clothes were suitable, whether there was anything wrong, and whether she should put on light makeup. I could only tell her over and over again that she was great now.
In my heart, Su Mo is always the best, no matter what clothes she wears or whether she wears makeup or not, because she is my friend. As for how Su Mo is in Zhuang Yi's heart, it depends on whether she is the person Zhuang Yi cares about.
In fact, I already knew the answer, but seeing Su Mo being so attentive, I still had some expectations and hoped that he would not let Su Mo down.
Zhuang Yi and Bao Kangqi appeared in Su Mo's anxious waiting. The moment she saw Zhuang Yi, Su Mo's eyes lit up. If I hadn't grabbed her arm, she might have rushed over uncontrollably.
I was afraid that Su Mo could not control herself, so I quickly called Bao Kangqi and Zhuang Yi who were standing not far away to sit down. Bao Kangqi smiled at me and dragged Zhuang Yi to the table. He sat next to me as a matter of course, looking at me from time to time.
"Zhuang Yi, long time no see." Su Mo still couldn't control her excitement, and before I could speak, she couldn't wait to talk to Zhuang Yi. When I turned to look at her, I only saw her face, which was red all the way to her ears.
"Indeed, it's been a long time." Zhuang Yi said slowly, and did not forget to smile at Su Mo while speaking.
When Su Mo saw his smile, she lowered her head as if she had been electrocuted, but she couldn't hide the joy on the corner of her mouth.
"An Xiaodi, I didn't expect you to invite us for dinner, it's really..." When facing me, Zhuang Yi had already put away the "affection" between his eyebrows, and looked at Su Mo meaningfully while speaking. It was obvious that he had understood my intention of inviting him here.
"Xiao Di didn't say to call you. I just couldn't bear to see you eat alone at home, so I brought you along." Seeing that I was a little unhappy after hearing what Zhuang Yi said, Bao Kangqi hurriedly explained to Zhuang Yi.
Zhuang Yi glanced at Bao Kangqi, then at me, and said slowly: "An Xiaodi, you are really amazing. You have taken advantage of my buddy. If someone else has this ability, then..." Zhuang Yi's words were meaningful. He always felt that I had taken advantage of Bao Kangqi by some means. Bao Kangqi's explanation for me obviously became a thorn in his heart.
"Zhuang Yi, I called you here to eat, not to listen to you talk. Can't I shut your mouth even when eating?" I finally couldn't help but fight back.
After hearing what I said, Zhuang Yi's face was already filled with anger, but Bao Kangqi grabbed his arm and signaled him with his eyes several times not to go too far, and his anger gradually subsided, but from time to time he would glance at me with eyes as sharp as a knife.
I looked at him, not wanting to be outdone.
However, Su Mo, who was sitting next to me, obviously had a different understanding from me. When Zhuang Yi and I were fighting with each other with our eyes, she had already asked about Zhuang Yi's life. Zhuang Yi just answered casually, but his unintentional words could make Su Mo excited.
"So you like black. I saw you always wearing white shirts, so I thought you liked white." After Zhuang Yi told Su Mo his favorite color, she was surprised.
"Silly girl, the day does not understand the darkness of the night." Zhuang Yi's pretentious words stunned Su Mo, and then she smiled and said that this sentence made sense.
I looked at Su Mo's excitement and couldn't help wanting to wake her up. Su Mo was infatuated with love, but I was sober. Black had nothing to do with the fact that the day didn't understand the darkness of the night. He said this just to tease Su Mo, just like he was teasing his pet at home.
Su Mo, who was immersed in love, would not understand this point, because she had already excitedly asked Zhuang Yi which he liked better, day or night. The expectant look in her eyes moved me a little.
If you don't keep someone in your heart, you won't care so much. But a girl cares so much, but Zhuang Yi doesn't know how to cherish her.
Looking at the nervous and excited Su Mo, I felt a chill in my heart. Su Mo, who was immersed in love, would not understand that her current appearance was the humble appearance that she once despised the most. For love, she has lowered herself to the dust, but I also understand that Zhuang Yi's words can make her bloom in the dust.
Bao Kangqi sat next to me, as if he had seen my disappointment, and he was very attentive in picking food for me and talking to me. I knew that because he liked me, he also put himself into the dust, but I didn't like it.
In fact, in my love for Su Yunjin, I am no different. I have also been poisoned by Su Yunjin. His words can affect my mood, and his expression can determine my happiness and sadness. I just don't know how others see me being so cautious and humble, and what kind of mentality the person I love has when he sees me trembling with fear because of him. For example, Zhuang Yi is just a spice of life for Su Mo, and for me, Bao Kangqi, I am just a friend?
In fact, I am more looking forward to another possibility. I look forward to living in his heart one day.
There are too many coincidences in the world. It is indeed a big surprise when the person you are thinking about suddenly appears in front of you. Of course, it may also be a fright.
I was frightened by Su Yunjin. When he walked to our table, to be exact, I was frightened by Zhou Shiyun who was beside him. Zhou Shiyun, who had been avoiding Su Yunjin to avoid me, actually started to pester Su Yunjin again.
I glanced at Zhou Shiyun, who looked very proud, and then turned my gaze to Su Yunjin. He still looked at me gently, his eyes like water were intoxicating, but at this moment I felt suffocated. Because of his arrival, because of the person who came with him, and because that person was holding Su Yunjin's arm, the two looked intimate, just like a couple.
It was obvious that Zhou Shiyun was pestering Su Yunjin, and the flattering and fawning smile on her face made me feel sick. Su Yunjin still had a faint smile on his face, and he was always gentle, but he let Zhou Shiyun hold his arm and did not resist.
Their intimacy hurt my eyes. I stared at them and watched them walk towards us step by step.
"Xiao Di, I didn't expect to run into you guys here." Zhou Shiyun saw me standing there in a daze and greeted me enthusiastically. I looked at Zhou Shiyun for a long time before I managed to squeeze out a few words through my teeth: "What a coincidence indeed."
Because of the arrival of Su Yunjin and Zhou Shiyun, Su Mo also recovered from her deep affection for Zhuang Yi and said to us with a smile: "How can there be so many coincidences? I told my brother yesterday that I would invite Xiao Di to dinner here today."
Knowing that we were going to have dinner here, Su Yunjin came?
After Su Mo finished speaking, the joy in my heart was like fire, as if it could set the prairie on fire at any time. I looked at Su Yunjin excitedly and almost forgot about the girl standing next to him.
I waited for Su Yunjin to give me an answer. Even if it was a lie, my heart, which had been broken into pieces, would be able to bloom. However, Zhou Shiyun's words turned my extravagant hope into despair.
She said, "I was the one who suggested coming to Yuelai Restaurant. I like the boiled fish here the most. Yunjin has come with me here several times." She spoke in a delicate voice and looked at Su Yunjin after she finished speaking. However, Su Yunjin did not respond. She still stood there with a faint smile and asked gently, "Do you mind if we go together?"
I looked at Zhou Shiyun, who was looking at Su Yunjin affectionately, as if our existence had become a foil. I instinctively wanted to drive them away, but before I could open my mouth, Bao Kangqi grabbed my hand tightly under the table. He smiled at me, then said to Su Yunjin: "It's fate that we met, let's sit down together."
Because of Bao Kangqi's answer, Su Yunjin and Zhou Shiyun were about to sit down. Bao Kangqi stood up and said to Su Yunjin, "You sit here."
I couldn't help but look at Bao Kangqi in surprise. He was sitting close to me, and his delicate thoughts touched me. When I looked at him, he was also looking at me, with a faint smile on his face, but there was clearly another emotion in that smile.
Zhou Shiyun saw what Bao Kangqi was thinking, and suddenly grabbed Su Yunjin's arm, saying delicately, "Yunjin, I want to sit with you."
Su Yunjin looked at Zhou Shiyun indifferently, and after a long while, he said softly, "Okay."
After saying that, Su Yunjin and Zhou Shiyun sat next to Bao Kangqi, and Bao Kangqi had no choice but to sit next to me.
As soon as my eyes moved away from Su Yunjin's face, I felt Zhou Shiyun's gaze. I looked at her, and she was looking at me with a smug and arrogant look on her face.
I couldn't hold back my anger, and was about to speak, but Bao Kangqi held my hand tightly again under the table. I looked at him, and he smiled and glanced at Su Yunjin. I also understood that he was signaling me to pay attention to maintaining my image. I glanced at Su Yunjin who was entangled by Zhou Shiyun, and the anger in my heart finally subsided.
"Brother, you didn't tell me you were coming." Good friends will always help each other when they are in trouble. I have to maintain my image, but Su Mo doesn't need to maintain her image in front of Su Yunjin. She glared at Zhou Shiyun unhappily, and then questioned Su Yunjin.
Su Yunjin looked at Su Mo and said with a smile: "I know you are here, and I thought it doesn't matter where we go to eat. We haven't gathered together for a long time, so I came here."
Su Yunjin's words were sincere and gentle, sweeping away the gloom in my heart like a spring breeze. Seeing a faint smile on my face, Su Mo turned her head and asked Su Yunjin: "Then why don't you come by yourself? Why do you have to bring outsiders?"
After Su Mo finished speaking, she looked at Zhou Shiyun unhappily. Even though Su Yunjin explained the reason why she came here, she still stood up for me. However, Su Mo's defense of me made Zhuang Yi, who had always disliked me, a little unhappy. When Su Yunjin looked at Su Mo in embarrassment, he slowly said, "What's the difference between outsiders and insiders? Since we are sitting at the same table, we are a family."
Several people at the table saw Su Yunjin's embarrassment and said yes. The embarrassment on Su Yunjin's face also disappeared because of Zhuang Yi's words. However, I didn't expect Zhuang Yi to point the finger at me again: "Are you right, An Xiaodi?"
Zhuang Yi's voice was still sarcastic, and his eyes were full of evil when he looked at me. I looked at him, stunned for a moment, not knowing how to answer.
"What? You don't agree with me, or do you think you and Yunjin are not a family?" When Zhuang Yi mentioned "family", he deliberately prolonged his voice. It was obvious that he had seen through my feelings towards Su Yunjin, and couldn't wait to use him as a weapon to attack me.
I looked at Zhuang Yi's provocative look and was about to fight back when Bao Kangqi's voice rang in my ears. He said, "Zhuang Yi, you have such a rich imagination. I was so close to Xiao Di and didn't hear Xiao Di say such a thing."
"An Xiaodi, when I said we are a family just now, you clearly didn't nod. Do you think the people at this table are not a family?" Zhuang Yi looked at me provocatively, with a gleam .
"I saw Xiaodi nodded. Zhuang Yi, if you continue to make trouble, it will be a bit too much." Bao Kangqi saw that Zhuang Yi was being aggressive and warned loudly.
Zhuang Yi didn't say anything else, but just looked at me fiercely, as if I was his enemy. Su Mo couldn't help but pull him and said softly, "Stop talking, let's eat."
The people at the table finally quieted down, but when Su Yunjin and Zhou Shiyun sat down at the table, it was already doomed to be a bad party, because Zhou Shiyun would not stop showing off her and Su Yunjin's happiness, and Zhuang Yi would not give up this good opportunity to hit me.
"Yunjin, eat some vegetables." Zhou Shiyun picked up the bamboo shoots in front of her and put them on the plate in front of Su Yunjin.
Su Yunjin lowered his head to pick up the dish and was about to open his mouth when Su Mo, who was sitting next to me, asked, "Brother, when did you start to like eating bamboo shoots? I remember you didn't eat them at home. Don't you like rapeseed the most? Xiaodi, you are closest to the rapeseed, help my brother pick some." Before I could say anything, Su Mo couldn't help but speak. She said a long time ago that she couldn't stand Zhou Shiyun's pretentiousness.
Because of Su Mo's words, Su Yunjin couldn't eat the bamboo shoots on his chopsticks, nor could he put them down. He looked at Su Mo helplessly, and finally put the bamboo shoots on the plate in front of him.
I breathed a sigh of relief and was about to pass the rapeseed to Su Yunjin when the turntable in front of me started moving. The rapeseed flashed before my eyes and finally stopped in front of Su Yunjin. Zhuang Yi, who was turning the turntable, was looking at me with a smile and said, "We are not a family anymore. It's so unhygienic to pass the rapeseed back and forth. This thing is better. It just turns over at a push..."
While speaking, Zhuang Yi deliberately turned the dial, then looked at me with a smile.
If I could, I really wanted to stand up and throw Zhuang Yi out right away because of his tit-for-tat and his excessiveness.
"Zhuang Yi, are you still my buddy?" Bao Kangqi had already seen through Zhuang Yi's thoughts and said unhappily.
Zhuang Yi glanced at Bao Kangqi and finally stopped talking. I couldn't help but breathe a sigh of relief. Bao Kangqi put the sweet and sour pork tenderloin in front of him on the plate in front of me as if to apologize, and said softly: "I remember you said that this is your favorite."
I glanced at Su Yunjin who was indifferent in the distance, and then at Zhuang Yi who still had a smug look on his face. Finally, I stretched out my chopsticks to pick up the fish not far away, put it in my mouth and chewed it slowly. But I didn't expect that the delicious fish would taste bitter to me.
I focused all my attention on Su Yunjin and didn't notice Bao Kangqi sitting next to me. The boy who had always been in high spirits now had a look of loss in his eyes.
When Bao Kangqi lost his mind because of me, I only had eyes for Su Yunjin, who was still being pestered by Zhou Shiyun. She often asked Su Yunjin to help her pick up food, as if she had forgotten the turntable that Zhuang Yi had mentioned just now. After eating the food that Su Yunjin picked up, Zhou Shiyun would smile and say something in Su Yunjin's ear, and Su Yunjin would sometimes nod gently, and sometimes smile knowingly.
Su Yunjin's response to Zhou Shiyun seriously affected my appetite. At this moment, I finally understood the full meaning of being unable to swallow food and eating something tasteless. Zhuang Yi, who had always regarded me as his enemy, saw my embarrassment and mercilessly stepped on my pain again.
"Yunjin, you two are a bit dishonest. If you have anything to say, go back and say it. Don't say it at the dinner table. Shiyun, what did you just say? Say it out loud, so that we can feel the sweetness between you two." Zhuang Yi looked at me smugly while speaking. He knew what I was thinking and knew what to say to make me sad. What I least wanted to see was Su Yunjin and Zhou Shiyun together, but he insisted on treating them as a young couple and their whispering as tenderness, but this was exactly what Zhou Shiyun wanted.
Seeing that her enthusiasm for Su Yunjin had successfully attracted the attention of all of us, she couldn't help but smile shyly, blushing and saying, "What did I say? I just said where to go after dinner. I have a bad stomach, so I have to take a walk after dinner or something."
Zhou Shiyun's words were gentle, and the fragility in her words made people want to pity her, but I knew the unbearable situation behind her lovely face.
Looking at her pretentious appearance and seeing her pestering Su Yunjin, my heart felt so blocked that it seemed like even breathing became difficult.
"If you have a bad stomach, just eat less. You don't have to worry about feeling uncomfortable if you eat too much." I held back the depression in my heart and said to Zhou Shiyun viciously.
Zhou Shiyun looked at me with an expression of innocence. She looked at Su Yunjin aggrievedly, her eyes shining, obviously with tears in them.
"What do you want to eat? I'll get it for you." Looking at Zhou Shiyun who was about to cry, Su Yunjin said softly.
"I'd better pick it up myself, so that others won't feel uncomfortable." Zhou Shiyun actually rejected Su Yunjin, which I didn't expect. I was a little surprised by her sudden change, and couldn't help but look at her, watching her stand up and pick up the dish next to Su Yunjin, and the dish fell on the table as soon as she picked it up. Zhou Shiyun suddenly turned sideways to see the dish that fell on the table, but her lips slid across Su Yunjin's face beside her.
The angle of my seat was just right, so I could see the whole scene clearly. I stood there in a daze, not knowing what to do.
"I'm sorry, Yunjin, I didn't mean it, I..." Zhou Shiyun turned into that pitiful little girl again and apologized softly, which made people unable to bear to blame her. Su Yunjin just sat there quietly, patted Zhou Shiyun's shoulder gently and said, "It's okay, it's okay."
"Yunjin, you are taking advantage of me and acting cute. Others can't see it, but I can see it clearly. How does it feel to have sex with her?" Zhuang Yi looked at Su Yunjin excitedly. He looked as excited as a gossiper who gets excited at the smell of gossip.
Su Yunjin blushed and sat there quietly without saying anything, while Zhou Shiyun blushed and put her head on Su Yunjin's shoulder, and said to Su Yunjin shyly: "I didn't mean it."
With just a few simple words, anyone could hear how coquettish Zhou Shiyun's words were.
I stared at Su Yunjin closely, waiting for him to speak, but he just sat there quietly, with a blush on his face. After a long while, he said softly, "Stop making trouble, let's eat."
I had been waiting for Su Yunjin's reaction, but I didn't expect it to be like this. I looked at Su Yunjin, and the disappointment in my heart was overwhelming, sweeping away my rationality, and I couldn't control my tears anymore. I looked at Su Yunjin with tears in my eyes, and listened to Zhuang Yi loudly praising Su Yunjin and Zhou Shiyun for their talent and beauty, and my heart felt like it was stabbed by needles.
I put down my chopsticks and tried several times to speak and say goodbye to them, but I couldn't say anything. I tried to hold back the tears that were about to flow, looked at Su Yunjin calmly, then stood up and fled in embarrassment.
This scene of affection created by Zhou Shiyun was a great humiliation to me, but I couldn't fight back because I didn't know what position I held in Su Yunjin's heart, nor did I know from what standpoint I should speak, so I could only escape.
Only by leaving here can I stop thinking about the scene where Zhou Shiyun kissed Su Yunjin; only by leaving here can I ignore the scene where Su Yunjin did not respond to Zhou Shiyun's kiss; only by leaving can I stop them from seeing how embarrassed I am.
"I was so busy eating that I forgot about things at home. I have things to do, so I'm leaving first." I tried hard to suppress the sadness in my heart and said calmly.
After saying that, I stood up, turned around and left without waiting for them to speak, looking as strong as I could. No one knew that after I turned around, I was already in tears.
When I ran out of Yuelai Restaurant, it started to rain in the already gloomy sky. I rushed into the rain without thinking, because only in the rain could I deceive myself and tell myself that I was not crying.
But I couldn't deceive myself, because my tears fell in the early autumn drizzle, and together with the rain, they split my face and shattered it, like glass falling to the ground, with only fragments left.
I walked aimlessly on this familiar street like a helpless child. There were shops playing music on the street, and a mellow male voice was singing softly: "When you are old, your hair is white, and you are drowsy..."
Listening to that familiar melody, it was as if all my strength was drained away. I squatted limply in the autumn rain, listening to the soulful singer repeating over and over again: "How many people have loved you in your youthful days, admired your beauty, whether falsely or sincerely..."
Time seemed to stand still, and I was immersed in the melody of "When You Are Old" to the point that I forgot time, purpose, and even myself.
When the rain stopped, I managed to stand up, but I was still shaky as I walked. I forced myself to walk home, but I was so dazed that I couldn't even tell the passing cars.
When I was about to cross the road unconsciously , my hand was tightly held by a warm hand. I struggled unconsciously, but my hand was tightly wrapped by that warm hand. I turned my head and saw Bao Kangqi looking at me quietly through my tearful eyes, with pity in his eyes.
"Don't worry, wait until the green light comes on and I'll accompany you." Bao Kangqi's voice is mellow and low, but it makes me feel inexplicably at ease.
I stood on the side of the road, letting Bao Kangqi hold my hand, giving me warmth and support.
But Bao Kangqi let go of my hand. I looked at him in confusion. Just as I met his brown eyes, his clothes were draped over me.
I reached out to pull off my coat, but he held my hand and whispered, "It's raining, it's too cold."
"You will be cold too." I whispered, taking off the clothes he had put on me and handing them to him. He took it, sighed, and put the clothes back on me. He looked at me with a smile and said seriously, "I am made of steel and I am not afraid of the cold."
I could see the determination in his eyes, so I stopped refusing and let him hold my hand and walk across the street towards home.
Just thinking about the scene at the dinner table, I still couldn't help crying. Bao Kangqi was at a loss to comfort me, and even told me: "I think Su Yunjin still likes you."
The bitterness on his lips was obvious when he spoke. I looked into his eyes and finally couldn't help crying out loud.
"Xiao Di, did I say something wrong? I'll change it, don't cry, I said something you don't want to hear, tell me, I won't say it again." Bao Kangqi comforted me incoherently, his eyes that were calm just now were full of panic. I looked at his helpless look and couldn't help but smile with tears in my eyes.
"Bao Kangqi, you lied to me. How could Su Yunjin like me? He doesn't like me at all. I know this better than you." I spoke, and my words stunned Bao Kangqi. He just looked at me quietly, waiting for me to explain to him.
"Bao Kangqi, I have liked him for two years. I know everything about him, his academic performance , his class schedule, the brands of clothes he wears... Unconsciously, his likes and dislikes have become mine, and he can easily affect my emotions. Everyone around me can see that I like Su Yunjin, but he is the only one pretending not to know." I wiped away my tears and told Bao Kangqi about the two years, more than 700 days and nights, that I had fallen in love with Su Yunjin. If I hadn't told him, I would have almost forgotten that these were once my days.
"Bao Kangqi, you may not believe it, but I have always known that Su Yunjin doesn't like me. He really doesn't like me. Everyone, including you, knows that I like Su Yunjin. How could he not know? He is such a smart person, but he just doesn't accept or refuse. That's why I spent time waiting for a result. Everyone around us thinks that we are a perfect match, but I know very well that he doesn't like me, otherwise, he would have accepted me long ago. Look today, I'm not sure if he likes Zhou Shiyun, but I'm sure he doesn't like me. If he liked me a little, he wouldn't let Zhou Shiyun kiss him.
"Bao Kangqi, do you know? I have been deceiving myself. I have been telling myself that he has not rejected me. As long as I work hard and become the person he likes, he will accept me. So I have been working very hard to study Su Yunjin and become the girl he likes. But no matter how hard I try, it is useless. Today I finally understand."
As I talked about my infatuation for the past two years, I couldn't help but burst into tears again, because in the previous two years I could still lie to myself and say that Su Yunjin just didn't want to express it, but today I can only tell myself the truth: Su Yunjin doesn't like me, so more than two years of dedication, my thoughts, and my infatuation have become the biggest joke.
Bao Kangqi was at a loss when he saw me crying. He reached out to wipe my tears, but as soon as he wiped them away, tears filled my eyes again. He looked at me with regret and couldn't help but sigh softly. But I didn't have the strength to support myself standing in this autumn wind.
I squatted on the cold ground after the rain, and my mind gradually became clear. I looked at Bao Kangqi, and he also squatted down and looked at me helplessly, his expression full of worry, just like the way I looked at Su Yunjin when he was unhappy.
"Xiao Di, what's so good about him that makes you do this?" These were clearly words of complaint, but coming from Bao Kangqi's mouth they sounded full of pity.
"Bao Kangqi, have you ever heard of "When You Are Old"? " I looked at Bao Kangqi seriously, waiting for his answer.
He didn't say anything, just looked at me for a long time before shaking his head.
I sang softly with tears in my eyes: "When you are old, your hair is white, and you are drowsy. When you are old and can no longer walk, you take a nap by the fire and recall your youth. How many people loved you when you were young and singing, and admired your beauty, whether it was false or true, but only one person still loves your pious soul and the wrinkles on your old face..."
Bao Kangqi sat next to me, listening to me singing this soulful tune with a choked voice. His face was gentle and tears of emotion gradually welled up in his eyes.
After I finished singing, Bao Kangqi looked at me seriously, and after a long while he said, "You sang really well."
"The one who sang the best was not me, nor was it the original singer Zhao Zhao. In my heart, the one who sang this song the best was Su Yunjin. It was two years ago, at the school's welcome party, he was in the center of the stage, under the dim lights, he held a guitar, strummed and sang softly. His sexy and mellow voice intoxicated me like wine, and made me feel that if I could grow old with this person, and when he was old and could no longer walk and was drowsy, I could still stay by his side, that would be the greatest happiness of my life." I said softly.
Bao Kangqi held my hand, and his warmth made me feel at ease.
"Bao Kangqi, am I too sentimental? I fell in love with someone just because of a song and was completely devoted to him. Now when I think about it, I admire my courage." I tried to make the smile on my face brighter, but I could feel that the happier I smiled, the deeper the pain in my heart. But I didn't want to show this bitterness to anyone, not even Bao Kangqi.
"It's nothing. I'm more emotional than you. I once fell in love with a girl. I only looked at her once, and the impression she left on me was her back. But it was this back that I can't forget." Bao Kangqi had a smile on his face when he spoke, but I could see the same bitterness as mine. I couldn't help but hold his hand tightly.
"But Bao Kangqi, was I wrong? I shouldn't like him so much. I shouldn't have missed more beautiful scenery for an illusory dream." Thinking of Su Yunjin's attitude towards Zhou Shiyun, my heart ached even more. I only regretted that I shouldn't have been so infatuated.
Bao Kangqi didn't answer, but just looked at me and held my hand tighter.
The autumn rain was still drizzling. Bao Kangqi and I squatted in the rain like fools, watching the sky gradually become darker and the lights on the street light up one by one.
"Xiao Di, since you know Su Yunjin's thoughts, just let her go." Bao Kangqi finally sighed and spoke slowly in my ear.
After hearing his words, I felt a pain in my heart and the tears in my eyes fell uncontrollably.
Bao Kangqi didn't expect that I would suddenly burst into tears, and he helped me wipe my tears in a panic. However, my tears kept flowing. After a while of panic, he suddenly hugged me in his arms and comforted me softly.
"Xiao Di, don't cry, don't cry, I was wrong, I shouldn't have said that. If you like Su Yunjin, then go after him bravely. Such an outstanding girl like you will definitely impress him, you have to believe in yourself." Bao Kangqi advised me anxiously, but the more he spoke, the sadder I became, because I knew his words were just consolation. It was impossible for Su Yunjin to like me. This was a fact, but I just didn't want to admit it.
"Xiao Di, you have to believe in yourself. Zhou Shiyun can never compare to you, either in appearance or temperament. You have to have confidence in yourself." Bao Kangqi saw that I was still crying and continued to persuade me. His tone was a little flustered, but I understood that he cared about me in his heart.
"Xiao Di, it's too late. Can I take you home first?" Bao Kangqi spoke in the tone of one who was coaxing a child. After he finished speaking, he helped me stand up without waiting for my answer.
When I stood up, I found that my legs were numb. Bao Kangqi helped me walk two steps before I stopped and told him that my legs were so numb that I couldn't walk.
Bao Kangqi looked at me helplessly, sighed, leaned over and hugged me. I didn't expect him to hug me. I was stunned for a long time. When I reacted and struggled to get down, Bao Kangqi hugged me tighter. He whispered in my ear: "Your clothes are wet, it's warm to hold you like this."
I didn't feel the warmth he brought me, but I clearly felt the tenderness in his words, which easily stirred up a wave of passion in my heart.
"Bao Kangqi, put me down." I couldn't control the turmoil in my heart. I knew that only by escaping from his arms could I stop the turmoil in my heart. I kept struggling, but Bao held me tighter.
"Xiao Di, your legs are numb. Just give me a chance to hold you for a while." Bao Kangqi's tone was pleading and full of affection. The moment he finished speaking, I didn't know how to refuse.
I could only let Bao Kangqi hold me and walk towards home step by step.
I understand Bao Kangqi's thoughts very well, but I understand even more clearly that I have no way to respond to his love. All I can do is let him hold me tightly on this rainy night in early autumn, giving me warmth and comfort.
"Bao Kangqi, it's not that I don't want to let go. I have tried to let go, but I like him and I can't help it..." As I said this, my tears flowed. In order to suppress the sadness in my heart, I buried my face in Bao Kangqi's arms and let the tears flow freely on his clothes.
"Xiao Di, I understand you." After a long time, Bao Kangqi said softly. His tone was still soft, but with a hint of sadness.
Bao Kangqi carried me to an intersection very close to my home, then put me down and said, "You will meet your neighbors further ahead. You can walk the rest of the way by yourself."
The warmth from Bao Kangqi's body was suddenly taken away, the autumn wind blew, and I couldn't help but shiver.
Bao Kangqi's eyes were as blazing as fire as he looked at me. I lowered my head and dared not look into his affectionate eyes. But he walked to my side and whispered my name: "An Xiaodi."
When I heard him calling me, I instinctively looked up and met his eyes. Just as I was about to speak, his face leaned down. His soft lips fell on my lips, with the coolness of the autumn wind and the passion of fire.
I don't know why he, who was just talking to me about Su Yunjin, suddenly kissed me. When his lips touched mine, I instinctively pushed him away. Under the dim street lights, his face was also stained with a halo, and his eyes were shining.
"Bao Kangqi, are you drunk?" I don't know how long it took before I hurriedly broke the silence between us. Drunk, this is indeed the best reason I can think of now.
Bao Kangqi just looked at me quietly , with a trace of sadness in his eyes. His lonely look made my heart ache.
"Bao Kangqi, you were careless just now, weren't you?" Bao Kangqi's silence made me even more embarrassed. I tried to find an excuse for what happened just now, but Bao Kangqi still didn't answer. He just looked at me with thousands of words in his eyes, but he didn't say a word.
"Bao Kangqi, you know, the person I like is Su Yunjin, there is no way I can't like him." I hope Bao Kangqi can give me a reasonable reason so that we can still interact like friends.
Maybe the humility of my words made Bao Kangqi feel distressed. After I finished speaking, he raised his hand again and touched my rain-soaked hair. He sighed helplessly and said, "An Xiaodi, I like you, and I can't help it."
I no longer had to find lame excuses for Bao Kangqi because his one sentence gave me all the reasons.
We are all pitiful people who cannot get the love we want, but the person I love, Su Yunjin, likes me.
If the facts could be changed, I really hope that Bao Kangqi could be swapped with Su Yunjin. That way, he would like me and I would like him. Then what belongs to us would definitely not be as cold and lonely as it is today. It would definitely be a long-lasting love that would move everyone.
But that is just a beautiful wish, just like this cold rainy night should have a romantic love, but in my heart, all I remember is its bone-chilling and heart-wrenching chill.