Chapter 34: Gathering Together (3)
"hateful--"
Zhou Yan growled again, and one could hear the grief and powerlessness in his heart, and more of it was regret and self-blame. If he could have suppressed it at the beginning, perhaps the situation would not be like this today. He has tried everything to undo the harm he had done to Yin Yin. Her life now was worse than death, which made Zhou Yan feel more painful than death. Compared with Yin Yin's current situation, the injuries he suffered were not worth mentioning at all. The same went for his right hand. It no longer mattered whether it was disabled or recoverable, because there was no way to save Yin Yin anymore, and even the only hope had been lost. How could he care about what would happen to himself?
Thinking of the happiest time in his life that he had spent with Yin Yin, even though she had lost her memory at that time, she would not resist him, she would smile in his arms and give him warmth. Such time had reappeared in his dreams so many times...
"Yin Yin——"
Only when he called that familiar name did Zhou Yan's tone carry a gentleness that belonged only to him. His heartache was far more painful than the flesh wounds on his body. In terms of his feelings for Yin Yin, he did not lose to anyone, including Zhou Cheng and Zhao Ziheng. It was a pity that no matter how much he gave, he could not win her heart. Whether it was Yin Yin or Shu'er, he had never won the hearts of any of them. All he had were the beautiful memories of the time when they were together after Shu'er entered Yin Yin's body and she had truly lost her memory...
'I don't ask for permanence, but I ask for possession.'
Perhaps what Zhou Yan needed was far more than what he had, so in the end both of them were hurt, not only hurting the person he loved the most, but also leaving an indelible pain in his heart. Loving someone is not just about getting her, but also about wanting her to be happy. Zhou Yan had never considered this, and what he lacked was also thinking about the person he loved. But there is nothing wrong with wanting something when you love someone, but the mistake is falling in love with someone who already has someone in his heart. One wrong step, all wrong...
The bedroom of [Chaofeng Palace].
"Are you feeling better?"
"Well, the emperor came to visit me personally, and my illness has improved a lot--"
Early this morning, the news that Xia Ningshuang was ill reached Zhou Cheng's ears. He had not thought of coming to see her, but the person who told him the news was the Queen Mother, and accompanied by the Queen Mother, so he came to Xia Ningshuang [Chaofeng Palace] with great reluctance.
"That's good. Shuang'er, as the mother of a country, you must take good care of yourself. The emperor should also not neglect the queen for state affairs. Come here more often in the future when you have nothing to do--"
"Yes, I will follow your mother's instructions..."
Everyone knew that Zhou Cheng was just trying to please the Queen Mother. Since Xia Ningshuang married into the palace, Zhou Cheng had never stayed overnight here, let alone touched Xia Ningshuang. Fortunately, the Queen Mother would occasionally host a banquet for them to have a homely meal or some large celebration, so that Zhou Cheng and Xia Ningshuang could be seen together. Otherwise, Zhou Cheng had never taken the initiative or come to her, because everyone knew that Zhou Cheng's heart was all for the sleeping Yin Yin. His actions made Xia Ningshuang, a princess and queen of a country, extremely embarrassed, but who dared to say anything to the king of a country? Occasionally, only the Queen Mother would say something that Zhou Cheng would not accept, just like now, although Zhou Cheng agreed, he never took any actual action...
Xia Ningshuang also knew Zhou Cheng. She had heard such words many times, but none of them could be put into practice. She hoped day and night that Zhou Cheng would take the initiative to come to see her and think of her as his wife. Since she married to Zhou Country, she was deeply attracted to Zhou Cheng when she first saw him at the wedding. She thought that she could get some favor from this taciturn, handsome and cold man in front of her. Unexpectedly, when she just had such an idea, it was completely destroyed by the sudden appearance of Yin Yin. From Zhou Cheng's cold face, he would become nervous when he saw Yin Yin. From the look on her face, she knew that the person Zhou Cheng loved was Yin Yin. She didn’t know what happened between them, let alone everything that happened around Yin Yin. She only knew that Yin Yin’s appearance was destined to make her be neglected , so she wanted to strike first. Unexpectedly, she was knocked unconscious the first time she wanted to attack Yin Yin, and she never had the chance to attack again. From the time Yin Yin fell into a deep sleep until now, she could only watch Zhou Cheng running around for Yin Yin, even to the point of leaving her aside and ignoring her. As a princess and queen of a country, this made her suffer humiliation...
"Then, you two should get along well with each other from now on. I'm going to go down first—"
"Yes, I send my mother off——"
"Farewell, Mother—"
"Um!"
Seeing that the two were thinking about their own things, the Queen Mother had no choice but to give them some time alone. Perhaps they should have a good talk. The Queen Mother left, taking all the palace maids and eunuchs with her, leaving Zhou Cheng and Xia Ningshuang alone...
"Emperors like you are so cruel—"
After the Queen Mother left, Xia Ningshuang was the first to speak. Her words made Zhou Cheng shift his gaze from watching the Queen Mother leave to her, but Xia Ningshuang just lowered her head. Did she not want to see Zhou Cheng's face?
Since ancient times, emperors have been amorous and romantic. They would keep the woman they loved by their side, and when they no longer loved her, they would throw her aside and find a new love at any time. Zhou Cheng might be different from other emperors, but he was just as cruel. He was concerned about other women and didn't take his own wife seriously or pay any attention to her. Maybe because of her, the queen, he would occasionally say a few words to her in some large occasions, but at other times, even his shadow could not be seen.
Perhaps knowing the meaning behind Xia Ningshuang's words, Zhou Cheng remained silent...
"It's been more than half a year. If you don't have any feelings for me, why did you agree to the marriage? Why didn't you make her your queen?"
Xia Ningshuang really didn't understand what happened between Zhou Cheng, Yin Yin, and Zhou Yan, and she didn't understand that he didn't realize he loved Yin Yin until he lost her. Also, Yin Yin seemed to have someone in her heart, a situation that even Zhou Cheng couldn't step into...