After Shen Qingyu left heartbroken, Mu Lingsu stood alone in the pharmacy for a long time.
Since she left Nanjing, she never thought she would meet Shen Qingyu again. He was a prince who grew up in the deep palace, while she was the daughter of a fallen criminal. A palace wall, an order, the fate of the two people has been completely different. After several years of tempering in the rivers and lakes, her attitude towards things is also very different from before. Although there is nothing to influence her cognition, and nothing to interfere with her judgment of the good and evil in the world, she has now understood the principle of trying to stop a chariot with a mantis arm, and has never dreamed of avenging her father.
She thought she was stubborn, but she didn't expect that an incident would change her stubbornness. She didn't blame Shen Qingyu for thinking she had changed, because she really had changed.
Perhaps it was from the moment she knelt in Fengzao Palace that her pride and innocence had dissipated, and until the day she left the palace, they were completely gone. From then on, she no longer had to worry about how to read people's expressions to please the queen, and she no longer had to walk on thin ice in the harem. Although she was free, she faced a bigger problem after leaving the palace, which was to find a place to live.
It was Yu Linzhi who gave her a job to make a living. Not only did she survive, but she also had the spare money to take care of the family's food and drink. This prompted her to forget the family feuds in the past, and her attitude towards Yu Linzhi changed drastically.
Over time, the happiness she had with Shen Qingyu at the age of fifteen has been overshadowed by the resentment deeply engraved in her bones and blood. Although she understands that it was the Queen who caused her to become like this and it has nothing to do with Shen Qingyu, she can no longer treat Shen Qingyu the same way as before.
It was too difficult for her.
She still remembered that when the queen issued an order for her to stop kneeling, it was also at this time of day, around the evening hour. When the queen's maid came to announce the order, she had already been kneeling for a day and a night. At first, her knees were numb and painful, but then they gradually lost all feeling. She had been forced to this point, and it didn't matter whether she kept her legs or not.
"Miss Mu, the Queen wants you to go back." The maid did not come out, but stood at the palace gate and passed the message to her from a distance.
"Please, Queen..."
Seeing that the Queen finally paid attention to her, Mu Lingsu raised her voice, hoping that the Queen could hear her. Before she could finish her words, the maid standing at the door interrupted her: "Miss Mu, please don't waste your time. The Queen can't change her mind. If you really want to save Doctor Mu, it would be easier to go to Guanju Palace and ask Concubine De for help."
The palace maid said this, but everyone knew that Concubine De had been ordered to be under house arrest.
Mu Lingsu was completely hopeless, but still didn't stand up. Tomorrow is the fifteenth day of the month, and all the concubines in the palace must come to Fengzao Palace to pay respects to the queen. At that time, the queen will come out even if she doesn't want to. Since she is already guilty, she doesn't mind risking her life and asks the queen for permission in front of all the concubines.
Seeing that Mu Lingsu remained indifferent, the palace maid became a little anxious: "Miss Mu, you'd better leave quickly. The eleventh prince will be here soon." The palace maid's original intention was to make Mu Lingsu understand that this matter was of great importance and it was not appropriate to involve the queen, including the queen's son. As long as the queen's shadow was there, the case of Mu Simiao would not be easily resolved.
When Mu Lingsu heard that Shen Qingyu was coming, he instantly felt a little happy. The last time he saw Shen Qingyu was on the day her father's execution order was issued. Since then, he has been avoiding her. He even rarely set foot in Fengzao Palace after learning that she cried and remonstrated in front of Fengzao Palace . His intentions could not be more obvious.
At that time, she thought that he didn't want to be caught between the queen and her. She knew in her heart that it was not easy for him to intervene in this matter, and she was unwilling to ask him for help, nor did she want him to be involved. But at this moment when she was about to give up, she only hoped that Shen Qingyu could ask her a question, even if it was "Is it important?" After all, in this huge palace, he was the only light in her life. Everyone could not protect themselves, and only he could let her relax for a moment.
She really didn't know who else, besides Shen Qingyu, could show her sincere kindness at this time.
She straightened her back, counted Shen Qingyu's footsteps, and waited for him to approach.
Listening to Shen Qingyu's footsteps, Mu Lingsu felt as if the sound was stepping on her heart. If she said she had never thought of asking Shen Qingyu for help, it would be a lie, but she knew in her heart that even if she asked Shen Qingyu for help, the possibility of success would be slim. If Shen Qingyu was willing to help her, he would not have waited for her to ask for it.
Shen Qingyu avoided her, naturally implying to her that he was unwilling to get involved in this matter. She couldn't blame him. After all, the queen was his mother and she was just his playmate.
Mu Lingsu didn't begin to understand the fickleness of human relationships in the palace until her father was arrested and imprisoned. Even though he was a prince, he couldn't easily beg for mercy. Compared with friendship, self-protection was more important. Moreover, she also hoped that Shen Qingyu, who was not favored by the emperor, would be safe.
Shen Qingyu had already walked to her side in the moment she was thinking. She almost dared not breathe. The fatigue and fear of the past few days made her physically and mentally exhausted. Waiting for Shen Qingyu to stop almost used up her last bit of energy. She secretly hoped that Shen Qingyu would stop and ask her a question, but she was also afraid that this scene would be seen by someone with ulterior motives and reported to the emperor, causing Shen Qingyu to fall into the quagmire.
It seemed like less than a moment had passed before Shen Qingyu had already arrived in front of the gate of Fengzao Palace.
Mu Lingsu felt as if a cold arrow had pierced her chest. Before she realized Shen Qingyu's indifference, her heart had been crushed by Shen Qingyu's actions.
She didn't even dare to raise her head, and could only pretend to kowtow, trying her best to lower her head, trying her best not to expose her embarrassment of being happy in vain. She had always been pampered and had never thought that she would have such a miserable day. She was like a warrior holding a sword to face evil spirits, facing the dangers of the world alone. No one cared about her, and no one asked if she could hold on.
She was really tired. But her father's life was hanging by a thread, so she had to persevere.
Although Mu Lingsu lowered her head, she could still see Shen Qingyu's feet. She stared at his feet intently until he entered the main hall of Fengzao Palace, and then she closed her eyes.
As if the fire in her heart was extinguished, Mu Lingsu's eyes flashed with scenes of her and Shen Qingyu growing up, their first meeting, the first time Shen Qingyu showed his affection to her, the first time she sewed a sachet for Shen Qingyu...
Everything seemed to have happened yesterday, but she knew that she and Shen Qingyu would only drift further and further apart. Mu Lingsu opened her eyes and tried to stand up with her hands. However, her limbs had not been used for a long time, and she fell down as soon as she tried to exert force.
The fall drained all her strength away, and even though pain filled her body, she didn't have the strength to scream. She no longer thought about getting up, and lay motionless, letting herself remain in the position she fell, crawling on the ground.
She wanted to continue struggling, but Shen Qingyu's indifference and indifference extinguished her last glimmer of hope. She finally gave up her high expectations and excessive expectations of her current situation, ended her self-paralysis, and admitted that no one in the former court or the harem was willing to help her.
After two incense sticks had passed, Prince Yi Yang hurried out of the palace. He seemed to be very angry. After a few steps, he got on the sedan chair and left Fengzao Palace.
The head maidservant beside the queen was ordered to see Prince Yi Yang off. She wanted to return to the inner hall after Prince Yi Yang left, but when she saw Mu Lingsu had fallen so hard and hadn't gotten up yet, she felt sorry for her, so she walked up to her and helped her up steadily: "Miss Mu, please take care."
Mu Lingsu just waved her hands weakly and didn't even want to speak.
The head maidservant had always been a half-master in Fengzao Palace. She called over a eunuch and a maid and asked them to take Mu Lingsu back to the side room given by the queen to rest: "Miss Mu, why do you have to torture yourself to impress the queen? A mother loves her child deeply. No mother would protect an outsider in front of her own flesh and blood. Why do you have to do this, young lady?"
"Why do you say that, aunt?"
Mu Lingsu then realized that the queen's cold attitude was related to the crown prince or Prince Yiyang, so she asked. Mu Lingsu knew that the storm of the murder of Concubine De had not completely dissipated, so she would pay special attention to any movement related to this matter.
The head maid was very secretive. She looked around and whispered to Mu Lingsu, "There can only be one between Crown Princess Mu and Princess Yi Yang."
The implication is directly about the relationship between Prince Yi Yang and her.
Mu Lingsu was still young at the time and could not understand Shen Qingyu's feelings for her. She mistakenly thought that the queen had misunderstood that they had an affair, so she summoned Prince Yi Yang to confront him. However, she did not know that it was Prince Yi Yang who took the initiative to confess that he liked Mu Lingsu and even took the initiative to ask for her hand in marriage.
The selection of the Crown Princess was arranged in the early years, and the Emperor's decree had already been a foregone conclusion. No matter how dissatisfied the Queen was, she could not change it. Even if Mu Yaoguang was from the same clan as the criminal, she had to accept it. Mu Lingsu was different. Regardless of her identity as the daughter of a criminal, even if her background was innocent, the Queen would not allow a pair of sisters to be her daughters-in-law.
The Princess of Yi Yang has such a good job. Although it cannot compare to the bright future of the Crown Princess, it is also an enviable high position. How could the Queen only give the favor to the Mu family who have been practicing medicine for generations? I think she will also wait for the right price, seek maximum benefits, and seek help for her son and her family.
Fifteen-year-old Mu Lingsu thought Shen Qingyu had already drawn a line between himself and her in front of the Queen. She was extremely disappointed with him and completely gave up hope in him, giving up the idea of ​​asking for a change of heart. She asked weakly, "Aunt, if I want to leave the palace now, can I do that?"
Staying away from the palace and hiding her identity is what she wants to do most at this moment.
The head maid had long known that the Queen wanted to expel Mu Lingsu from the palace, but she had not expected that Mu Lingsu wanted to leave on her own before the Queen summoned her.
She said, "Miss Mu, now that all your uncles and cousins ​​have been imprisoned, where are you going after you leave the palace?"
She has always been a cautious person, but today she was particularly soft-hearted. She had taken care of Prince Yi Yang since he was a child, and she treated him like her own child. She also knew that Prince Yi Yang really liked Mu Lingsu, so she naturally couldn't bear to see Prince Yi Yang's sweetheart suffer too much.
"Let's go where we are going." Mu Lingsu was exhausted and had to lean on the palace maid who was supporting her. She wanted to stand on her own, but she couldn't muster the energy. "As long as we are not in the palace, it doesn't matter where we are."
The head maid didn't say much and ordered the two eunuchs and maids to send her back.
The next day, the Queen summoned her and told her that Shen Qingyu had come to Fengzao Palace the night before to ask for an imperial decree to grant them a marriage.
The queen sat at the head of the hall, playing with a string of red sandalwood Buddhist beads. She hadn't looked at Mu Lingsu since she came in, and said coldly, "Let's not talk about whether I agree or not. Yesterday, I was in the hall and saw you kneeling at the door from a distance. Yu'er clearly passed by you, but she didn't recognize you." She smiled meaningfully and asked Mu Lingsu, "If a man really loves you, how could he not recognize you?"
After what happened yesterday, Mu Lingsu's heart was as still as a pool of stagnant water. She kowtowed without any emotion and replied expressionlessly: "How can a minister be worthy of the love of King Yi Yang?"
"The one he likes is just Mu Lingsu, the daughter of the imperial physician and the sister of the Crown Princess." The queen smiled happily. She was very happy about being able to shatter Mu Lingsu's self-esteem.
Although she still liked Mu Lingsu, she would not agree to her becoming her daughter-in-law. It was not because of Mu Lingsu, but because when the Empress Dowager was alive, she always suppressed her as the Empress, and even took the initiative to instigate the Emperor to arrange a marriage between her eldest son and the Mu family's legitimate daughter.
After so many years, she still had resentment in her heart. Therefore, she could only try her best to stop the Mu family's daughter from joining the royal family, and she could not agree to it readily.
"Once you are down and out, he will automatically ignore you." The queen wanted to break Mu Lingsu's psychological defenses and force her to give up and leave Shen Qingyu. She knew that Mu Lingsu had been kneeling for several days, and thought that Mu Lingsu still wanted to get her forgiveness so that she could marry Shen Qingyu, so she spoke very ruthlessly.
Mu Lingsu was determined to leave, and followed the Queen's wishes and said, "Your Majesty is right. I am of humble origin and know that I am crude and cannot be compared with His Royal Highness Prince Yi Yang." She kowtowed to the Queen solemnly and said, "I would like to leave the palace. I hope Your Majesty will grant me permission. I thank Your Majesty."
Everything the queen said was true; she had no way to refute it, nor did she want to refute it.
There is no point in saying more, she will never stay in the palace .
Mu Lingsu's request was exactly what the Queen wanted, and she arranged for a carriage to take her back to Suzhou the next day. She and Shen Qingyu never saw each other again for the next eight years.
At first, she had fantasized about her reunion with Shen Qingyu countless times, but she could not have expected it to be so awkward, making both of them unhappy.
On this side, Mu Lingsu was trying hard to get rid of the past, while on the other side, Yu Linzhi was busy drinking and chatting.
This was the first time that the Yu Mansion had hosted a banquet to welcome guests since the arrest of Yu Jianwu, the owner of the Yu Mansion. The guests were from afar, coming all the way from the Western Regions, bringing a whole caravan of iron ore to deliver the goods.
Mu Lingsu wanted to eat the dinner cooked in the kitchen in her room. Before she even picked up her chopsticks, she heard Yu Linzhi knocking on her door: "I'm inviting people to dinner at home. I've made some Suzhou dishes. Do you want to eat?"
"It's already this late, why are you inviting guests? I hope you're not hungry and want me to test the poison in your food?" Mu Lingsu said as he opened the door.
She thought that Yu Lin was the only one at the door, but she didn't know that there was a foreigner with deep eyes and a high nose standing next to him. She thought that this was the guest that Yu Lin was going to entertain.
She nodded as a greeting: "Nice to meet you."
Yu Linzhi pointed at the foreign man and said, "This is my junior fellow apprentice Sutijia from the Tang Sect. This time he is here to deliver goods to the Wulin Alliance and he came here to have a quick meal." Then he turned the topic back to the main topic, "Do you want to eat?"
Just as she was about to agree, she heard the door of the next room open, and then she saw Princess Yongjia and Prince Yiyang coming out. When Shen Qingyu saw Yu Linzhi coming, she thought he was looking for Mu Lingsu, so she didn't plan to greet him. She silently called Shen Hanyan over and wanted to take her away.
Yu Linzhi had no idea about the conversation between him and Mu Lingsu. When he saw him and Shen Hanyan coming out, he invited them: "Your Highness Prince Yiyang, Your Highness Princess Yongjia, are you interested in having a drink?"
Shen Qingyu wanted to refuse, but Su Tijia at the side took over the conversation: "So you are a visitor from the palace. I am a foreigner, but I have the honor to meet the descendants of the emperor. It is really a pleasant surprise." He bowed to Shen Qingyu and said, "Please honor me, Your Majesty."
Sutijia has been traveling on the border for many years, so he naturally knows that it is easier to get things done by making friends with high-ranking officials. So when he knew Shen Qingyu's true identity, he subconsciously wanted to make friends with Shen Qingyu.
"You..." Shen Qingyu looked at him straight in the eye, and suddenly realized that this person looked familiar, but he couldn't remember when and where he had seen him. Maybe they had met when they were traveling in the Western Regions to sell goods, or maybe they had simply mistaken each other. His intuition told him that this person's identity was not simple, so he changed his mind, "That's fine, let's have a drink together."
Shen Hanyan has always hated seeing her brother and Mu Lingsu together, so she said impatiently, "Eleventh brother, Yan'er wants to go too!"
"Don't mess around." Shen Qingyu looked serious and his tone became stern.
Su Tijia looked at Princess Yongjia and felt that she was cute and adorable, and he immediately liked her: "If your highness wants to go, it's fine. Your Highness doesn't have to be so serious."
Shen Qingyu thought about it and decided that it was not appropriate to discipline his sister too strictly, so he agreed.
There was great joy at the banquet, both the host and the guests were toasting each other.
Sutijia wanted to make friends with the prince Shen Qingyu, so he took out a token with a black iron lion pattern and gave it to him, promising: "Your Highness's business is all over the world. If your business reaches the thirty-six countries in the Western Regions in the future, you will definitely need me. At that time, I will definitely help you with all my strength, even if it means my death."
Shen Qingyu was drinking happily at the banquet. When he saw Sutijia handing him such a finely crafted sign, he took it without saying anything, saying, "Brother Su, you are too modest. I don't want to bother you." Just as he was about to say something else polite, Shen Qingyu felt that he had seen this sign before. It had a lion pattern, was made of black iron, and had Kushan characters on both sides. He had seen it about two years ago when he was robbed in the Western Regions.
"Brother Su, this sign..." Shen Qingyu held the sign between the two of them and asked Su Tijia, "What is it?"
Two years ago, he was robbed by a group of Kushan bandits in the Western Regions and suffered severe brain damage. He forgot many things at that time. He vaguely remembered that this pattern was once a token of an organization , but when he thought more deeply, his mind went blank.
Sutijia pointed at the sign and said with a smile: "It is a token of the Kushan royal family. I walk around the palace all year round, and the king gave me this sign for convenience."
Shen Qingyu was half-believing and half-doubting. He stared at the lion on the sign for a long time, but couldn't figure out what it meant, so he had to put the sign away.
Yu Linzhi drank too much at one time, his eyes were blurry, and he was obviously a little drunk. He looked at Su Tijia and Shen Qingyu talking happily, secretly pointed at the two and asked Mu Lingsu: "Xiao Mu, Xiao Mu...what are they talking about?"
Mu Lingsu had tried to persuade Yu Linzhi for a long time at first, not wanting him to drink too much. But today, for some reason, he insisted on drinking one glass after another, and the bottle of wine was about to be empty. When she saw that Yu Linzhi was already drunk, she became more and more anxious: "Who knows what they are talking about? You'd better go and rest."
"I'm fine." Although he said this, Yu Linzhi's tongue began to get tied.
He turned his head and wanted to look at Mu Lingsu and talk to her calmly, but the blurred double image in front of him made him upset.
He blinked, but the double image didn't go away. Yu Linzhi was a little impatient, and wanted Mu Lingsu not to move, so he reached out and grabbed her wrist, and said vaguely: "Don't move."
Mu Lingsu was frightened by this overly intimate action, as if a heavy object fell from the sky and hit her heart. She had an urge to avoid him: "Yu Linzhi." His name came out of her mouth, and she didn't know what to say next. In fact, she knew she should break free from his hand, but she didn't.
The two of them had known each other for so many years, and he had held her hand more than once, but she could feel that this time was different from all the previous times. But she couldn't tell what was different.
Yu Linzhi looked at the uneasy-looking woman in front of him with hazy eyes. She was not beautiful, but now reflected by the candlelight around her, he could actually see some charm of a stunning beauty.
How is this possible?
He suddenly smiled softly. He knew that he must have drunk too much wine and his eyes were blurry.
He said, "Xiao Mu."
Mu Lingsu couldn't hear Yu Linzhi's drunken words clearly, so she wanted to get closer to hear more clearly: "What's the matter?"
"I..." Yu Linzhi put his lips close to her ear, "I'm drunk, please help me go back."
Judging from Yu Linzhi's appearance, he was indeed drunk. Mu Lingsu didn't want to care about him, but she was worried, so she could only grit her teeth and help him up: "Why don't you drink more."
Yu Linzhi was already drunk, and when he got up, he felt weak all over, so he could only lean on Mu Lingsu to help him up. Mu Lingsu trembled as she helped him stand , and called the housekeeper of the Yu Mansion to come over to help.
Shen Qingyu was drinking happily with Su Tijia. When he looked up and saw Mu Lingsu holding Yu Linzhi in his arms, his heart suddenly ached. But he quickly forced himself to suppress this feeling. Since they talked not long ago, he had accepted the reality that he and Mu Lingsu would never go back to the past. He should not care about her affairs, let alone interfere.
Shen Hanyan saw her brother's reaction and followed his gaze. What she saw was Yu Linzhi and Mu Lingsu hugging each other in public. She always hated Mu Lingsu, so she always remembered to report her to her brother. This was the perfect opportunity for her.
"She is so unfaithful to her husband. No wonder she is still unmarried at the age of 23." She said disdainfully.
Shen Qingyu ignored her words and turned around to drink and chat with Su Tijia.
"Brother..." Shen Hanyan was very disappointed. She secretly pulled the corner of Shen Qingyu's clothes and said timidly, "Brother, look, the person she likes is obviously not as good as you..."
"Shut up." Shen Qingyu glared at her angrily. He had never used such an impatient tone to Shen Hanyan before. Shen Hanyan shuddered and dared not speak anymore.