Chapter 20: Do you love him? Sometimes, maybe.

As Chen Huixing got up and dressed, she looked up and saw Pei Jiqing, barefoot, rubbing himself against the end of the bed, propped up. A sliver of white skin was visible from his lower back. He was still half asleep, his eyes half closed, and his skin was still tinged with bruises. But that didn't stop him from extending two slender white fingers and gesturing towards Chen Huixing: "Honey, let me button your shirt."

Chen Huixing reluctantly walked over. Pei Jiqing's reckless hand first touched the Alpha's pecs.

"A little soft," he spun, his voice swirling under his collar. His warm breath tickled the side of his neck.

Chen Huixing thought, this is how they should live a normal life. Pei Jiqing has finally returned to normal.

Everyone could be intolerant of Chen Huixing, but Pei Jiqing couldn't. He was used to Pei Jiqing being a beautiful canary, vain and noisy, beautifying their nest with golden threads in his mouth all day. How wonderful! But he wasn't as useless as he'd imagined. His work was glamorous, his reputation growing, and almost everyone who mentioned him as an Omega would mention his talent and beauty.

Pei Jiqing's face, still beautiful on the big screen, would lift his eyes and chuckle just when the camera zoomed in for a close-up.

The first time Chen Huixing thought Pei Jiqing resembled a canary was during one year's TV station's annual party. He was a guest of honor at the awards ceremony, dressed in makeup, drunk, and lying obediently on his bed in his bedroom, a finger on the side of his face, lost in thought.

Only when Chen Huixing approached did he see clearly that his eyes were slightly open. Golden eyeshadow outlined the corners of his eyes, and scattered gold fell into his irises, forming a stream of light. His raven-feather eyelashes cast a light gray shadow when they fell, and his lip gloss was an amber tinted with fine shimmer.

He could imagine the breathtaking beauty that would appear on the dazzling stage, the ring lights chasing Pei Jiqing, and the way the waist of his custom-made suit would be cut to create a contour. For

all these years, Pei Jiqing had never accused Chen Huixing of being overbearing or selfish. He had naturally accepted everything Chen Huixing did, willingly and happily, because he loved him. This was what Pei Jiqing had always told him.

Chen Huixing had gone from initial disbelief to complete faith.

It was all thanks to Pei Jiqing.

So when Pei Jiqing said he wanted his job and hated him, Chen Huixing was shocked and worried. His brows furrowed, his gaze fixed on Pei Jiqing, as if trying to discern something from that familiar face.

This should not be what Pei Jiqing, who loves him, should say.

That person always looks up at him with sparkling eyes, saying that he will support all his decisions.

So he must have been led astray by his so-called friends.

If there is someone who plays the willful role in a family, then there must be someone who plays the balancing villain role. Chen Huixing thinks it’s okay to sacrifice for the family.

Pei Jiqing grabbed Chen Huixing’s cufflinks, blinking his eyelashes as he tilted his head: "Just pretend you didn’t see the small report from the secretary. I will never talk nonsense again. I will chew up the sensitive words and swallow them, okay? Let me go back to work in two months, okay?" Chen

Huixing looked at Pei Jiqing for a while for some reason, his Adam’s apple rolled, and his thumb suddenly pinched the tip of his chin, with his tiger’s mouth holding the lip scab that he had bitten last night: "Are you obedient?"

His fingertips rolled over the Omega’s lower lip. The force was not strong, but it revealed a bright color.

Pei Jiqing nuzzled him, staring into Chen Huixing's eyes like a child seeking praise: "I'm obedient."

Chen Huixing lowered her eyes and said, "Why don't you want to do something else?"

Pei Jiqing muttered, "I've bought so many beautiful clothes. Do I have to sit in the office every day wearing haute couture? That would be visible to so many people, and my fans would even edit my outfits." He

was as naive and vain as ever, his mind empty.

Just like when he was being plotted against, who could protect him without him?

Chen Huixing said yes, three months.

Pei Jiqing said, "How about two and a half months? My fans will miss me."

But there weren't many of them.

Chen Huixing suddenly changed her tune and said, "Then half a year."

Pei Jiqing compromised, "Okay, okay, three months is three months."

Pei Jiqing placed an affectionate kiss on Shen Huixing's lips, as if celebrating. He took Chen Huixing's wrist with both hands and said, "I shouldn't have said that to you before: 'Hubby, you're so good to me.'" Chen

Huixing suddenly pinched the back of his neck, pressing her fingertips against the scabby bite mark on his gland. Pei Jiqing's eyes flushed with pain, his last plea for mercy crushed between their lips, his tongue laced with water and sent it down his throat.

The kiss ended.

Chen Huixing placed his palm on the protruding joint of Pei Jiqing's neck: "Just so you know, don't let me hear such nasty words in the future."

Pei Jiqing's arm around his waist suddenly tightened, and his nose rubbed the outline of his chest muscles through the fabric of his shirt. He was used to lowering his posture and speaking softly. He stretched out his arms to hug Chen Huixing's waist, buried his face in his chest, and rolled his eyes while saying that he wouldn't do it again.

Damn that authoritarian chauvinism, wait until he gets the program back first.

Chen Huixing suddenly pinched his chin and lifted it up, digging his thumb into the scab on his lip he had bitten last night, and said he would apply some medicine later.

The bed sheets were soaked with sweat from last night, sticking sticky to Pei Jiqing's back. As his breathing became rapid and broken, Pei Jiqing's vision went black, as if he was about to fall into endless darkness in the next second. The fingertips on the back of his neck almost sank into his skin.

Pei Jiqing's eyelashes were wet with tears and stuck to his lower eyelids. His vision was so blurred that he couldn't see the crystal chandelier on the ceiling. What was he thinking? He had been cautious all these years, afraid of causing trouble for Chen Huixing. But just this time, why did he run into the trap?

Chen Huixing nodded and said, "You can enrich yourself at home during this time. Spend less time on the Internet and read more."

Pei Jiqing had something to say about studying. The year he returned to the Pei family, he did exercises every day without a break in order to break away from his previous life. As a result, he was not willing to study at all

. Pei Jiqing pressed the tip of his tongue against the soft flesh of his cheek and thought resentfully, why should I marry you if I want to study.

When Chen Huixing put his eyes back on him, Pei Jiqing reached out to straighten his clothes and said, "Husband, I'll go to your study later. You have a lot of books."

Chen Huixing went to work and received a farewell kiss from Pei Jiqing after a long separation.

Whenever Pei Jiqing kissed him, he wouldn't stop until he had a kiss on his face. He clasped his hands tightly around Chen Huixing's neck, his fingertips practically digging into her skin. He tilted his chin up, his lips straining upwards, his eyelashes fluttering as if he were using all his strength. Chen Huixing looked down at him, his gaze resting lightly on Pei Jiqing's flushed cheeks, thinking to himself, He must love me very much, just like everyone says.

Pei Jiqing would kiss him until he was exhausted, but Chen Huixing would always stand erect, like an iceberg, refusing even to lower his head, aloof and superior, as if offering alms.

Chen Huixing opened the car door and slid into the back seat, a silver watch peeked from his sleeve, the dial reflecting the gloomy sky.

"It's a nice day today," he said in a steady voice, his tone light and relaxed, as if discussing something perfectly ordinary. The driver tightened his grip on the steering wheel and glanced out the window—withered yellow leaves swirling in the wind, dark clouds hanging low, and the air thick with a damp scent. He opened his mouth, as if about to say something, but swallowed it back in the end. He just nodded and responded vaguely.

"...Indeed."

As soon as Chen Huixing's car was out of sight, Pei Jiqing threw off his slippers and rushed into the cloakroom, his fingertips brushing against the clothes hanger, sunglasses on his nose.

Pei Jiqing sat on the leather sofa in the director's office with his legs crossed, the tips of his shoes swaying intermittently. He leaned one hand behind his back, tapping the dial of his watch lightly with his fingertips, his eyes sweeping across at the Omega opposite him like a knife. The man still had a bit of immaturity on his face, standing awkwardly beside the director, timidly calling him uncle.

Pei Jiqing always assumed the worst of people, who knew if he was a real uncle or a fake uncle.

His eyes narrowed slightly under his sunglasses, like a cat staring at its prey. He slowly took off his sunglasses, flicked his fingertips on the temples, and the lenses reflected a cold light that happened to hit the Omega's face.

The director sat opposite him, his fingers unconsciously touching the top of his shiny head, a layer of fine sweat beads on his forehead.

"No one is allowed to touch my show," Pei Jiqing said with undeniable determination.

"But you've asked for leave," the station director's voice was dry, as if forced from his throat. "And it was the executive who personally requested it."

Pei Jiqing's lips curled slightly, his gaze piercing. "That's my show, too. Doesn't changing the host require my permission?"

More beads of sweat formed on the station director's forehead. He wiped them away. "Jiqing, the station has its own arrangements."

Pei Jiqing said, "No one is allowed to touch my show."

Pei Jiqing always wore a gentle smile, her lips slightly raised, her eyes soft as spring sunshine. She spoke softly, her tone imbued with a touch of humility, as if she were polite to everyone. Her colleagues at the station always described her as easy to get along with, despite her husband's high position, despite her romantic acumen.

However, only those who truly knew her knew that Pei Jiqing herself possessed an almost obsessive desire for sovereignty, a sovereignty she would never tolerate.

His program is his territory, and no one can touch it. Pei Jiqing's fingers tapped lightly on the table. The force of his fingertips was not strong, but it was carried with an unquestionable firmness. There was still a gentle smile on the corner of his lips, but his eyes were as cold as ice, as if silently telling everyone - this is mine, no one can get involved.

The director's eyes were meaningful, as if he was choosing his words. His gaze stayed on Pei Jiqing's face for a moment, and the corners of his lips moved slightly, as if he wanted to say something, but he hesitated.

"...Jiqing, it's no use for you to stand firm here, but..." The director's voice was very long, and the ending tone was a bit tentative.

Pei Jiqing didn't even raise his eyelids, and lightly swiped his finger on the screen of his mobile phone and directly dialed Wei Ji's number. He threw the phone on the table, and the metal shell collided with the wooden table, making a crisp sound.

"Wei Ji, the program needs to be replaced, you should withdraw your investment." Pei Jiqing's voice was as calm as if he was talking about the weather.

The director's face changed instantly. Before he could say anything, Wei Ji's crisp voice came from the other end of the phone: "Okay."

The director's eyes went dark for a while, and he quickly picked up the phone and said, "Mr. Wei, please think about it again."

The director finally managed to appease Wei Ji. Pei Jiqing said lightly, "I'm going out for a walk," and turned around and slipped away.

He slumped down on a chair in the studio, turned around on his toes, and the chair creaked. Pei Jiqing squinted at the spotlight above his head, thinking that it might be good to retreat behind the scenes. At least he didn't have to smile fakely at the camera every day.

He reached out and touched the button on the console. His fingertips were covered with dust, and he rubbed them on his trouser legs. The air in the studio was still filled with the smell of hairspray, mixed with the bitter aroma of coffee, which made people feel at ease.

Pei Jiqing crossed his legs, the toes of his shoes swaying, and he thought to himself that he would be back in a few months, and the corners of his mouth curled up unconsciously.

He walked out, and the setting sun shone in from the floor-to-ceiling windows on the 29th floor, and the golden light sprinkled on the tip of Pei Jiqing's shoes. The holographic screen of the building opposite was playing advertisements in a loop, and the picture flickered, making his eyes sore.

The phone suddenly vibrated, and Pei Jiqing glanced at the caller ID. It was Wei Ji. He curled his lips. He just took advantage of him, so it would be bad to not answer

the phone. "Hello?" Pei Jiqing responded lazily. Wei Ji's voice on the other end of the phone was a bit teasing: "Aren't you going to be a good wife to Chen Huixing? Why do you care about your crappy show?"

Pei Jiqing rolled his eyes, thinking that Wei Ji was really talking about something that was irrelevant.

Pei Jiqing's voice was a little helpless: "I just can't go back for the time being."

When he said this, his eyes were a little empty, as if he was looking into the distance, or as if he was not looking at anything at all.

Wei Ji didn't respond immediately. A brief silence filled the air, as if something were weighing on him. When he spoke, his tone was calm, yet it carried an indefinable weight: "It seems you don't know yet."

"Know what?" Pei Jiqing's voice rose slightly, a hint of doubt, as if he had a premonition, a subtle unease within him.

Wei Ji's voice remained calm, yet like a blunt knife: "The military commander is about to retire, and your husband has long had his eye on that position. Otherwise, why do you think he's been eliminating dissidents and promoting his own? I'm a businessman, but I know that politics and business are inseparable, and I've heard a little bit. All those vacancies are filled by your husband's people. Do you think a good wife like you, who has made mistakes, has a chance to return to the screen?"

Pei Jiqing suddenly raised his eyes at this, just in time to catch Chen Huixing making his final statement in the corruption case across from him . His voice was sonorous and powerful, his aura unstoppable, as if he had the whole world under his control.

Pei Jiqing had once admired him, his ambition, his ability, his unstoppable aura.

Later, he realized that what he had cast upon himself was always just a shadow. That kind of light had never illuminated him.

Emotions surged in Pei Jiqing's eyes, as if something had exploded in his heart. In that instant of enlightenment, he suddenly understood many things. The director's meaningful look, Chen Huixing's light-hearted question, "Can't I do something else?"

It turned out that he had always thought that he danced brilliantly on the stage, but in reality, he was just a clown.

Chen Huixing was at a critical juncture in his rise to power and did not need an Omega who was active in public and helpless towards him.

Even if she was really willing to stay at home and be Pei Jiqing's obedient wife, that gentle and talkative flower, that would be fine.

But Pei Jiqing was unwilling to accept that. For so many years, he had buried his own personality, and in return, what did he get?

Chen Huixing's love? No.

A career? No.

He had made a blatant mistake, and those spreading branches were ruthlessly cut off, as if he should never have had his own direction of growth.

Many years ago, Pei Jiqing stood here for the first time, looking at everything in the high-rise building, and he had a little extravagant hope in his heart - he wanted to stand side by side with Shen Huixing, stand at the same height, and share that light. But Shen Huixing is an S-level Alpha, and his ability is so powerful that others can't catch up. No matter how hard Pei Jiqing tried, he could never catch up.

That feeling of powerlessness is like a thin thorn, piercing the bottom of my heart, and it hurts from time to time.

Wei Ji is right, this matter is actually very easy to think clearly. In the past, an officer's wife envied Pei Jiqing, saying that he was lucky to have a job that could develop his own personality. At that time, Pei Jiqing naively thought that this was Shen Huixing's indulgence of him.

But now he understood that indulgence also has a time limit. The days of petty quarrels are over, and he has to go back to being the dignified future commander's wife, put away all the edges, stand obediently behind Shen Huixing, and be a perfect foil.

But Pei Jiqing knew in his heart that he has never been the kind of person willing to be a foil.

Shen Huixing lied to him.

There was no so-called three months.

This time it was not Xu Ze's suggestion at all, but Shen Huixing's direct request.

He said that they were a whole, but Pei Jiqing knew in his heart that the secret he carried destined Shen Huixing to never be his escape route. Those wedding vows were still vivid in his mind, but they had not even experienced poverty and hardship, nor were they tortured by illness, and the two hearts had already quietly drifted away.

Pei Jiqing sometimes wondered, would God forgive him for his hypocrisy towards her husband over the years? He just wanted to play the role of the ideal Omega in Shen Huixing's heart, well-behaved, gentle, and perfect. But after so many years, he still couldn't fall in love with him.

Perhaps Chen Huixing would never forgive him.

"Jiqing, it was my fault back then, I don't deny it. I was too young back then, and you were so cold to me, so I made a mistake. But I've always loved you. Over the years, I've met so many different people, and now I know where my heart truly lies."

Pei Jiqing concealed all emotion, his voice as calm as a pool of stagnant water. "Wei Ji, I can't stand having my things tainted by others. That's why we broke up in the first place."

Wei Ji's emotions suddenly became agitated, his voice filled with resentment and questioning. "What about Chen Huixing?! If he were to become corrupted one day, would you abandon him too?"

Pei Jiqing's answer was crisp and clear, without a trace of hesitation: "Yes."

Wei Ji was stunned for a moment, then pressed, "Do you love him?"

Pei Jiqing's tone was distant and indifferent, as if he was talking about someone unrelated to him: "Sometimes, maybe."

Pei Jiqing thought to himself, I love him too. I love the way he risked his life to save him, I love his handsomeness and his illustrious military achievements. But he also hated him, hated that he always ignored him, came when he was called and dismissed when he was dismissed, hated that he could easily destroy his dream with just one sentence.

Wei Ji suddenly felt very interesting. He remembered that when he made the auction book public last time, Chen Huixing sent someone to deliver a message, saying that his wife loved him very much and asked him to give up this idea, and then turned around and got himself into a lot of trouble. How would he feel if he heard what Pei Jiqing said today?

Pei Jiqing said: "Wei Ji, let's cooperate, it doesn't matter what, give me some strength."