Chapter 10 We agreed not to separate
Why don't you believe me?
We agreed that no matter what happens, we will face it together and never separate.
But why did you leave me alone?
——Chi Yanze
1
I didn't expect to meet Chi Yanze at my doorstep.
I thought that after saying those words at the hospital gate, I would never see him again.
But unexpectedly, when I rode my bicycle back home with my aunt, I found him squatting alone at my door.
The raindrops from the eaves fell on him, but he seemed unaware of it and did not dodge, just getting wet in the rain.
I felt like I was in a dream. I had no idea how he knew where my home was or why he was sitting here.
My aunt recognized him, and she pushed me, motioning me to come over, and she called a neighbor who was passing by, and the two of them started chatting. As they chatted, she simply let the neighbor support her and went to visit the neighbor's house, deliberately leaving space for us.
My heart was beating so fast and every step I took required a lot of effort.
Chi Yanze didn't seem to notice that I had returned. His eyes were slightly closed, and his slender fingers were tapping on the floor in front of the house again and again, as if he was counting something.
I stood in front of him in a daze, not knowing whether I should call him.
However, the next second, a faint smile suddenly appeared on his face.
"Ruo Qiqi." He called me, his voice was very soft and full of indescribable intimacy.
"Yeah." I was attracted by his smile as if I was possessed, and nodded stupidly in response.
He stood up, put his hands on my shoulders, looked down at me, and said seriously: "I counted hundreds of times, and then I saw you. I knew I would wait for you."
What an idiot! He is waiting at my doorstep, he will definitely wait for me and I will definitely go home.
But what did he mean by that? Why was he waiting for me?
"Did my stuff fall on your car?" I asked confusedly.
I don’t know if I’m too stupid or if his hints weren’t clear enough, but until now, I haven’t noticed the restlessness in his heart.
"Ruo Qiqi." He suddenly raised his voice and called my name excitedly.
I responded reflexively, "Yes."
Chi Yanze touched my hair that was messy from the wind, sighed helplessly, and then, as I looked at him in astonishment, he held me in his arms with my mind blank.
Like before, his warm breath filled my ears, and my heart beat so fast that it seemed like it was about to jump out of my chest.
"I have had a very bad time in the past two years. Because when I sleep, when I get up, when I eat, when I take a bath, when I go to school, when I do anything, I will think of someone." A pleasant male voice sounded beside my ears .
Is that person me?
A hint of anticipation actually arose in my heart.
"When I go to bed, I can't help but say goodnight to the phantom on the ceiling. When I eat, I can't help but bring a breakfast to school, but I don't know who to give it to. Because I know that the person who often forgets to eat breakfast and goes to school is not Yao Haiyan, but Ruo Qiqi." The voice in my ear continued, "During class, I will always look towards a seat. The girl in the seat turns around and smiles at me, but I panic and avoid her sight, because that person is not the one I expect to see. The panic in my heart is getting stronger and stronger, and the longing is getting stronger and stronger."
"Chi Yanze..."
Is the person this boy is talking about really me?
This is probably the first time he spoke to me so gently!
This was probably the first time he expressed his true feelings !
Has he really become so good at talking?
"You said you were only gone for three days. I knew it was a lie, but I still waited for three days after three days. I looked for many places where you might be, but I couldn't find you."
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." Hearing his words, I couldn't help but apologize.
I'm sorry, I lied to you, but I had no choice.
I don’t want to either…
"I keep asking myself, are you hiding too far away, or am I not trying hard enough?" Chi Yanze's voice became a little excited, "Qiqi, why didn't you ask me if I would be angry with you, drive you away, or not want you? Why didn't you ask me and just left like that? Whether you are Yao Haiyan, Ruo Qiqi, or anyone else, I have never thought of driving you away."
I was held tightly in Chi Yanze's arms, and it was a little hard to breathe, but I couldn't bear to push him away, so I just listened to him quietly. My eyes and nose were sore, and I didn't know when tears started to flow.
I know that the tears at this time are tears of happiness.
In the past two years, I have never dared to imagine whether he resents me, hates me, is angry with me, or whether he will still care about me.
I have never dared to think about it because I was afraid that the answer would make me sad.
So I arrogantly thought that as long as I hid in a place where I couldn't reach them and missed them alone, that would be enough, and I would be very happy.
However, when I saw him and Yao Haiyan at the jewelry stall for the first time two years later, I realized that my heart had always longed for more.
I can't stand his indifference to me. I don't want him to pretend not to know me, I don't want him to ignore me, I don't want him to be angry with me...
Am I very selfish?
I clearly lied to him, but I still didn't allow him to hate me.
"I like you, not because your name is Ruo Qiqi or Yao Haiyan, but because you are just you. I am not good at expressing my feelings, but my heart knows that I like you."
The sincere confession rang in my ears, and I couldn't help sobbing. I stretched out my hands, hugged him tightly, and punched his back again and again, shouting his name loudly.
"Chi Yanze!"
"Chi Yanze!"
…
The name that I had only dared to call silently in my heart , now I kept repeating it over and over as if I could never call it enough.
I really miss him, I really miss him, I think about him when I go to bed, when I wake up, when I eat... I think about him no matter what I do...
But I didn't know that he was thinking about me too.
I really am a fool.
I never dared to ask him whether he liked the name "Yao Haiyan" or Ruo Qiqi who pretended to be Yao Haiyan.
"Ruo Qiqi, I've said so much, do you have anything to say to me? I like you, what about you?" Chi Yanze hugged me tightly and asked uncertainly, but before I could answer, he immediately said, "Ruo Qiqi, I don't allow you to say you don't like me, anyway, I'm relying on you, who told you to provoke me first."
My face couldn't help but turn red, and I suddenly remembered that no matter when I was pretending to be Yao Haiyan or now, it was always Chi Yanze who took the initiative to confess to me, and I seemed to have never told him how much I liked him.
Seeing that I didn't answer, Chi Yanze gently pushed me away from his arms and looked at me deeply with his clear eyes.
"Ruo Qiqi..."
Chi Yanze frowned, seeming a little angry.
I couldn't help laughing, wiped my tears hastily, didn't say anything, just swiftly moved away from him, took out the key from my pocket and opened the door.
"Why are you so talkative now? You are totally different from the person you were two years ago. Do you want to come in? You are soaked."
I opened the door and turned around to say to Chi Yanze.
I just don't tell him how much I like him.
I like him so much that I can't express it in words.
Is that love?
Only my heart knows.
